The Merman and the Grump
by Raikun-sama
Summary: Levi, an anonymous writer who's on a break, takes a walk on the beach and encounters a strange boy. A strange boy who is certainly NOT a former merman. A strange boy who Levi is certainly NOT falling in love with. Modern AU Riren. Loosely based on The Little Mermaid.
1. Men Don't Like a lot of Blabber

**A/N: Hey there people...**

**So I got hooked on Shingeki no Kyojin fanficition last month and finally decided to make my own~ ^O^ **

**This story will be a very loosely based version of the The Little Mermaid, both the Disney film and the original story, set in a somewhat modern AU. **

**Unfortunately, there will be no talking animals. )X Don't get me wrong, I LOVED Sebastian, but I don't think I'll be able to write them in without turning this story into a bigger disaster than what it already might be. XD**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Shingeki no Kyojin, The Little Mermaid, Pokemon, Code Geass, Fullmetal Alchemist, One Piece, or Death Note. **

**I DO own the cover art, however. XD Which is why it's of such miserable quality.**

* * *

The day Levi found him, the weather had been beautiful.

The sky was so blue, it was nearly painful to look at it. A few white clouds drifted lazily as a slight breeze blew through the beach. It was one of those mornings where one was glad to be living near the ocean.

It was also perfect weather to take a walk on the beach, and it was then when Levi-

Wait.

WAIT.

NO.

**NO.**

That's not how it fucking went. What the hell? Start over.

* * *

The day Levi found him, the weather had been _crap_.

The sky was an ugly gray. The thick, dark clouds crowded the sky were an even uglier gray. The wind blew with annoying, erratical strengths, sending sand spraying everywhere. It was one of those mornings where one was glad to be living_ inside_ a house.

It was perfect weather to simply crash and do absolutely _nothing_, which Levi was doing at the moment. Stretched out on his bed, one of his legs dangling carelessly off of the edge, the man was aimlessly staring at the spotless ceiling of his room.

Levi let out a quiet sigh, leaning the back of his arm against his forehead. It was really no good today.

There were some days in this house where he could actually get up and _do_ something, and when he woke this morning, he had a feeling that this was one of those days... and it was not.

"Hrmng?" He felt a wet nose nudge his leg. Levi opened one eye reluctantly to glare at his large sheep dog, Bean, who pawed the ground impatiently.

"...Stupid mutt. Go walk yourself if you're that desperate."

* * *

If someone asked about Levi's employment status, he would say that he was a writer... a writer on a break, that is.

Very few people knew that Levi was the anonymous author of an extremely popular string of dark crime and mystery novels. Then again, very few people knew Levi actually existed.

Levi had never been a particularly ambitious person. He hadn't been expecting anything, really, when he had started writing. But from the start, his books had been on an unending streak of (rather disturbing, in Levi's opinion) popularity.

According to his editor, the number of radio and television shows asking him for interviews kept increasing and increasing, while the circulating theories about his identity were getting more wilder and wilder by the day.

It had been too much for Levi. He was not a spotlight person, was never one, and would never be one. Even if his identity was anonymous, the paranoia of someone finding out had been getting to him.

Eventually, Levi had cracked. As frankly as possible, he told his editor there was no way he could write like this with the whole world seemingly intent on hunting him down. He was going to take a break. A _long_ break. Until things would calm down.

His family had owned a large summer house on a quiet beach near a small town. They hadn't visited it very often; Levi could hardly recall anything of it from his childhood.

But at that time, it seemed like the perfect chance for his escape. No city. No noise. No editor. No work.

So here he was, living like a NEET (Not in Employment, Education, or Training). Wasting his time with a goofy dog he hadn't even wanted to adopt and looking at the sea. Fabulous life, wasn't it?

* * *

This day was turning about to be no different than others.

Levi rolled over to his side, wondering if he should just sleep the whole day away.

It was then when he heard it.

"_EEEEEEEEEEEEYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"_

"Wh-what the-" Levi managed to choke out as he instinctively slapped his hands over his ears, his usually narrow eyes widening as the piercing scream split the gray air like a sharpened knife.

Levi had never heard such a horrifying sound in his life. It sounded as if someone was being tortured. It sounded as if they were mercilessly being cut in half. It sounded... human.

The scream continued for a few seconds, then abruptly stopped as quickly as it had started.

"..."

"..."

Now half-sitting up, Levi glanced warily out of his window, still partly in shock. Just what in the world WAS that? Whatever that was, he was pretty sure it had come from the ocean. Bean, who had previously padded sullenly away, came bounding into Levi's room, yelping in shock.

His owner clenched his jaw nervously, the echoes of the scream still ringing in his ears. Levi knew that some animals, such as seals, could make sounds eerily similar to humans, but that scream just now... Levi fought the urge to shudder. There was just something about it that sent his stomach churning uneasily.

He continued to stare warily at the window, half-wanting to lie back now and slowly pretend he hadn't heard that scream. The thought was actually becoming very appealing to him, until-

_Vrrrb. Vrrrrb. _Levi blinked at the vibrating phone near his desk lamp. Reluctantly, he dragged himself near his desk and glanced at the caller id.

"..."

Oh fuck. Muttering curses under his breath, Levi swiped the phone up and opened it, closing his eyes and gritting his teeth as if preparing for a punch to the face.

He's hit, but it's a punch of words. "LEVI~~~~! YOU WOULDN'T GET WHAT I JUST FOUND OUT IN THE LAB-"

"And I would totally love to hear it, you crazy bat, but I've suddenly heard a scream outside my window, it sounds like someone is hurt, so I need to go NOWOKBYE."

"WHAT? A SCREAM? OOH, HANG ON, I WANT TO KNOW E-" _Beep_.

Levi massaged his temple, glaring at the phone as he slowly slid off the bed. God damn it all. Now that Hanji had called him, he'd actually have to _go_ outside and check it out. The woman had an annoyingly uncanny ability to detect Levi's lies, poker face or not.

As if he could understand his master's words, Bean gave a happy bark before running once more out of the room to eagerly wait for Levi at the doorway. Hastily pulling on a plain collared shirt, Levi strode briskly into the cold sea morning air.

In a few minutes, he was walking near the shore's edge, his shirt collar flaring up in the wind while Bean loped about.

The black-haired man gave a slight "tsk" as the sand whipped into his clothes and his shoes. One of the main drawbacks of living on the coast. Sand could create so many problems... he'd have to make sure to shake his shoes out thoroughly before he went back inside.

Despite the bone-chilling shock the scream had given him earlier, Levi's present state of mind was filled with anger and bitterness from Hanji's call. In all honesty, he hadn't expected to come across anything in his "stroll".

So when Bean suddenly started barking frantically and bounding around, Levi made another annoyed sound, thinking that the big mutt had found another crab to chase.

"Woof! Woof! WOOF! WOOF! WOOF!" Levi's eye twitched as the canine's incessant barking began to get to him. There must be a lot of crabs... He finally turned to bad-temperedly stomp after Bean.

Despite his short stature, Levi caught up to the huge dog easily. "You mangy mop!" He raged, managing to snag Bean's collar in an effort to control him. "What the hell is making you so-"

As he spoke, Bean still struggled in his grasp, finally breaking free and causing Levi to snap his head up in the direction the dog was heading. "Hey-" Levi abruptly stopped, his eyes widening once more as his voice died in his throat.

Bean was not bounding around a bunch of crabs, as he had expected, but... a boy, sitting in the shallows. A boy Levi had never seen before. He seemed rather young, a teenager, definitely, his short tousled brown hair dripping with sea water as he vainly tried to push Bean away with tan arms.

It looked like he had been playing in the water before Bean had come up to him, but he didn't seem to mind the dog. The boy smiled brightly, revealing quite white teeth as Bean slobbered happily over his face. Sensing Levi's presence, he glanced up at the man with bright green eyes, eyes that seem to sparkle like the ocean on a sunny day-

... This boy... was actually quite good-looking...

To his utmost horror, Levi realized his mouth was hanging open. He promptly closed it, quickly frowning.

Finally tearing his eyes from the boy's face (because Levi had certainly NOT been ogling him this whole time), Levi glanced down and realized he was clothed in nothing but a... ...wait, what WAS that!?

As he looked closer, Levi realized it was a torn rag of what looked like an old sail mast with rope. His eye twitched. How someone could even TOUCH an article that came from Hanji-knows-where was beyond his thinking. Is THAT was teenagers were wearing these days?! Good grief... it was like he was some lone survivor of a ship wreck...

"Oi, kid," the black-haired man began curtly, taking a step towards the boy. "What do you think you're doing here?"

The boy only stared at him, his large eyes seeming to get wider at the sight of Levi while Bean continued to nudge his now unresponsive hands. After a few seconds, as if realizing he had only been gaping wordlessly, he suddenly lapsed into a flustered expression, fidgeting nervously.

"..." Levi raised an eyebrow. The boy seemed to panic more, turning towards Levi and making frantic hand gestures at his throat and at the ocean, none of which the man could remotely understand. "...you live around here, kid?"

The brunet paused hesitantly before slowly shaking his head.

"...you have any family here?"

More shaking.

"...you have a place to where you're staying at?"

A longer pause before... _Shake_, _shake._

"...you ran away?" Levi questioned, voicing a suspicion that had been steadily growing for some time.

The boy's eyes widened even more as he immediately shook his head in response, scattering drops of sea water everywhere.

"...right..." Clearly unconvinced, the black-haired man sighed, looking at the brunet again. Great. Of course he would have to encounter a runaway like this. It would be impossible for him to just go and leave the kid now without seeming like a complete jerk.

There was a short silence, only broken by Bean, who ran back and forth between the two, still barking intermittently.

"...well..." Levi tilted his head to stare at the rather threatening sky. "Looks like a storm might be coming, so you'd better get your ass out of here. I don't want to be held responsible if you end up getting drowned or something."

The boy gave him an odd look, not seeming to understand Levi's words.

"...You better leave." Levi rephrased slowly. Could this boy be foreign? Levi was starting to find his silence a little unsettling. "Go. Walk away. You know?"

Still no sign of comprehension.

"Get _up_," Levi repeated, beginning to feel a bit of impatience. "Your legs are there for a reason, you know. _Use_ them."

Much to Levi's frustration, the boy simply turned to the said limbs and also stared at them blankly.

"...what? You can stand, can't you?"

The boy bit his lip, as if in worry, then leaned forward awkwardly, placing his palms on the ground before shakily drawing himself up on wobbly legs.

Instinctively spreading out his arms in an attempt to keep his balance, the boy stared down at his quivering feet, his green eyes containing what almost looked like nervous triumph.

Levi continued to watch him, not understanding what was the big deal about _standing_, when the boy's temporary expression of pride was quickly replaced by panic as he suddenly lost his balance. Flailing wildly, he ended up crashing back into the water with a painful _SPLASH!_

Levi nonchalantly looked on for several seconds before shrugging and offering the kid his hand. "You look like you need help..."

Shaking his wet locks out of his eyes, the brunet glared at Levi before shaking his head empathically, drawing his hands behind him.

After witnessing several more stubborn and unsuccessful attempts, Levi finally reached out to stop the poor boy, grabbing onto his waist to stop him from falling again. "Hey, hey, quit flailing, you'll just hurt yourself."

Damn it, the brat would actually be taller than Levi if he stood straight.

"Could it be that... your legs are injured?" He gave the boy's legs a dubious glance. He didn't see any sign of a wound, but something was obviously wrong here.

"What a pain..." Levi muttered as he leaned down to better grip the boy's waist, hoisting him up onto his shoulder like a sack of potatoes. He felt the boy stiffen, shocked, before quickly squirming in protest, clearly not happy about his position.

"Cut it out." The black-haired man snapped, inwardly wincing as his clean clothes came in contact with wet, sandy skin. "I really don't want to do this either, but at the rate you're going, you'll be stuck here until nightfall."

At those words, the boy reluctantly ceased his movements, his fingers digging nervously into the back of Levi's shirt.

"Tch. Relax, brat. I'm not going to drop you. ...on purpose, at least." Most people made the sad mistake of underestimating Levi's strength due to his height. Looks like the boy wasn't an exception.

Now laden with the mysterious kid, Levi began walking back in the direction of his house, Bean shadowing his step.

He shouldn't panic. It was going to be fine. Once Levi got back, he'd get the boy to spill where the place he came from and send the damn brat to wherever it was. Maybe Erwin would know-

A sudden punch to his shoulder abruptly pulled Levi out of his thoughts. Pissed, he turned his head back sharply to see the kid panicking and Bean barking frantically. "What-" For the second time that day, his mouth fell open.

In front of them, without warning, a huge wave had formed and was falling, a wave that was far bigger than what should be possible.

"The _fuck_?" Levi choked out in shock, managing to barely jump out of the wave's reach. Bean gave a loud yelp as half of his body got splashed by the salty spray that should not have been able to travel so far.

As the water slowly receded, Levi began to retreat farther inland, not taking his wary eyes of the coast. What the hell had that been, a miniature tsunami!?

To his surprise and relief, however, the waves continued their usual pattern at the shore, as if the abnormally large wave had never happened.

"..." Well, that was strange. Catching his breath, Levi glanced at the boy, who was still clutching Levi's back in terror. Recalling the way he had been warned, the man narrowed his eyes suspiciously. "...hang on, kid... are you mute or something?"

The boy nodded sadly in response, his green eyes seeming to darken as one of his hands lingered by his throat.

"...oh." Shit. This kid couldn't walk and he couldn't talk. Could he actually be from a shipwreck?! Levi gave another sigh. "Whatever. I'll take you to my place until I find wherever the hell your parents are. Don't touch anything and you'll still have all your fingers. Okay?"

Perhaps the lack of work was getting to him, turning him into a fucking softie like this. Not waiting for the boy to reply (it's not like he could, anyway) Levi continued to trek back to his house.

With all that had happened, he had completely forgotten the mysterious scream earlier.

* * *

Feeling more shocked than any other time that day, Levi let the towel he had been holding fall to the ground. "..._What_ did you just imply?" He hissed slowly at the now confused teenager.

"..."

It had been several minutes after they had arrived back at Levi's house. The more time he spent with the boy, the more Levi realized how unfamiliar he seemed to be with many things. After preventing the boy from curiously poking Levi's kitchen sink handle for the millionth time, Levi finally demanded the boy take a shower before contaminating anything with his grimy body.

To his utmost horror, the boy had only tilted his head, as if to ask "What does shower mean?".

"Did you just imply that you do _not_ know what the word 'SHOWER' means?" Levi continued, his grey eyes flashing dangerously.

The brunet blinked before nervously nodding, not understanding what he had done to land himself into this situation.

Levi felt his eye twitch again. Oh hell no. They were going to have some major problems here. "...Tell me you know what the word 'cleaning' is!" It was an order, not a question.

The boy seemed to be thinking hard for several seconds before brightening up and nodding, lifting his hands up and miming a broom sweeping on the floor.

Thank the heavens... Letting out a breath of relief, Levi massaged his forehead with his hand. "All right, listen closely, brat. Showering... is the same as cleaning, except you're cleaning your body without any clothes on. It is one of the most important things a human needs to do. Every day. DO WE HAVE AN UNDERSTANDING?"

His cheeks slightly red, the boy hastily bobbed his head up and down.

Realizing that the boy couldn't possibly walk to the shower in his state, Levi carried him to shower himself, muttering complaints under his breath the whole way. "Honestly... not knowing what a _shower_ is, a fucking _shower_! No wonder you're so filthy..."

After he set the kid down, the brat continued to look around curiously, as if he had never been in a bathroom before. Levi bit back another groan. He was going to have to explain everything, wasn't he?

He pointed abruptly to the shower stall. "There. You stand... well, I guess you can lean in there... here, let me help you... ...and you... take that thing off..." Levi muttered reluctantly, gesturing to the rags that hung around the boy's waist.

The boy obediently let the rag fall to the ground, but not without a lot of hesitating and blushing. To his mortification, Levi felt his face beginning to heat up as well. "Ah..."

Determinedly keeping his gaze upward, the black-haired man reached to turn the shower on, the boy wincing in surprise as he did. "See? Water comes out from there. To turn it on, you just twist this... and to turn it off, you twist it the other way. You rinse yourself with water. You take soap, you rub it on the cloth, then you rub the cloth... all... over... your body..." God damn it, he was not made to explain these things. "Then you rinse yourself again."

"..."

"...Oh. And for your hair, you do the same, except you use this thing, it's called shampoo. After you're done, you dry yourself with the towel. Okay?"

To Levi's utmost relief, the boy didn't seem to find any problems in his explanation, already experimentally extending his arms to the shower. "All right, I'll go and find some spare clothes for you, I guess..." It felt really weird to be the one talking the whole time. Usually he was the silent one.

Part of him felt that it wasn't a good idea to leave the boy alone in the shower, he could hardly stand, but Levi was not going to stay behind and baby the boy. It wasn't because he was embarrassed at the lack of clothes or anything! Really... Levi had seen nicer bodies... a lot of nicer bodies... ...really...

He was halfway to his room when a horrible thought struck him. Abandoning all sense of dignity, Levi turned and dashed back to the bathroom like a wildman. "BRAT! TELL ME YOU KNOW HOW TO USE THE FUCKING TOILET!"

* * *

Leaving the brat alone in the shower had definitely not been a good idea.

In the short time he had been left alone, the boy managed to spill the shampoo, send the soap flying into the mirror, and flood the bathroom.

Levi took one look at the scene and briefly debated if he should have those OH-MY-GOD-WHAT-THE-HELL-HAVE-I-DONE-TAKING-THIS-HO OLIGAN-IN-moments.

* * *

_Several hours (in which Levi cleans, mops, and ends up having to help the boy put on clothes) later..._

"THIS," Levi gestured to a vacuum, "is a vacuum. VACUUM. It cleans the floor by sucking up dirt and dust and what not. This is how you use it. Got it?"

Clothed in Levi's spare shirt and pants (which were a bit too short for him), the boy nodded for the eleventh time, his eyes shining seriously.

"Good. Now THIS," he picked up a duster, "is a duster. DUSTER. It cleans anything that's dusty. This is how you use it. Got it?"

Another serious nod.

"Hn." Levi casted a glance at the pile of cleaning instruments he had already shown the boy. "I guess that's all of it. Now listen carefully to me. These..." He waved an arm at the pile. "...are the instruments of GOD. When you use them, you use them with CARE. You do not abuse them. They have been made for a great purpose of mankind, and you will respect that purpose. Understood, brat?"

The boy nodded, repeating the action three times for good measure.

"All right." Levi carefully picked up the cleaning supplies and began returning them to their closet. As he closed the closet door, a sudden realization struck him. "...Hmm... I don't know your name, brat, do I?"

"..."

"...nah, I can just keep calling you brat."

The boy immediately puffed his cheeks out in protest, scowling at Levi.

"Fine..." He drew out a chair and sat down, looking at the boy in an unconcerned manner. "Let's see if I can guess it. Ash?"

_Shake_, _shake_.

"Not Ash. Lelouch?"

_Shake_, _shake_.

"Not Lelouch. Edward?"

_Shake_, _shake_.

"Luffy? Light? Ellen?" At the last one, the boy stuck his tongue out at Levi, apparently knowing it was primarily a female name.

"...for someone who doesn't want to be called 'brat', you sure act like one..." Levi grumbled, standing up to get a paper and pencil. Green eyes followed his actions curiously, widening as the materials were pushed towards him.

"Can you read and write?" Levi asked, half-expecting the boy to shake his head again.

Instead, however, the brunet nodded eagerly, immediately reaching for the pencil. Levi looked on in mild interest as the boy pressed the tip to the paper-

_CRACK!_

"..." Apparently, the boy used so much force that the pencil promptly broke into splinters. Levi face-palmed. "I should have gotten you a piece of chalk and slate instead..."

* * *

_Several pencils later..._

"You don't need that much strength. See?" Levi finished writing the word 'clean' in neat letters before handing the pencil back. "Now, try to write _properly_. I don't have an endless supply of pencils, mind you."

Slowly, the boy wrote 'clean' as well, his handwriting large and quite messy.

"You write like a caveman." Levi observed in disgust, crossing his arms and leaning back. "Is that what you really are? No, don't answer that." His grey eyes shifted to the bright green irises. "...so, brat, what _is_ your name? Not that I particularly care..."

Giving a small start, as if he had forgotten why he was trying to write in the first place, the boy hurriedly scribbled several letters across the paper before proudly showing it to Levi.

"E... R... E... N..." Levi said slowly, managing to somehow decipher the letters from the barely legible scrawl. "...Eren?" He asked experimentally, not sure if he had the right pronunciation.

A wide grin spread across the brunet's face as he nodded, beaming happily.

"Huh... I see... you have a surname, Eren?"

The boy, Eren, nodded again, starting to write once more before holding the paper up.

_YEAGER._

"...Yeager?" Levi scowled. He hadn't heard of anyone with that name in town... "Are you German?"

Blank stare.

"Ah... what was it again, damn it... ...Deutsch?" If this Eren was foreign, it might explain why he didn't know certain words. ...Then again, it certainly didn't explain why the boy didn't how to use common household items.

Eren picked up the paper and started writing again. _  
_

_I dont understand._

"...you forgot the fucking apostrophe, brat."

Eren tilted his head.

_Whats an apostofe? _By now, the paper was already running out of space.

"...I'll teach you that later." Levi mumbled, getting up again to fetch a large, spiral notebook. "Here." He carelessly tossed the notebook to Eren, who quickly caught it. Hm. His reflexes weren't so bad...

"You can use that to communicate from now on." Levi explained as Eren ran his hands over the notebook's cover, his eyes sparkling in wonder. "It's a pretty big one, so hopefully you won't run out of pages..." His voice trailed off as Eren held up the notebook's first page, large letters already scribbled over it.

_What is your name?_

Levi blinked. Oh, that was right. He had forgotten about that, hadn't he? His eyes slowly rose from the page to Eren's face, which was nearly giddy with anticipation.

"...Levi. Spelled L-E-V-I."

Eren gave him another wide grin before flipping the page over and writing again.

_Thank you, Levi! You ar kinda mean, but you ar also really nice!_

"...you forgot the fucking 'e's after 'are', brat." Oh fuck. The kid was like an innocent 5-year-old. How the hell was Levi supposed to deal with him!?

Before Eren could write anything else, a loud rumble echoed across the room. Levi's eyes darted down to the teenager's stomach. "...oh. That's right, you haven't eaten anything yet." Teenagers and their appetites... hopefully he wouldn't eat the whole fridge.

"Anything you like to eat, Eren?" Levi called as he trudged towards his refrigerator. "...Ah. Hanji left this lasagna... is it worth it, I wonder? Erwin's still alive, so it might not be poisoned... oh, fuck it. Teenagers have strong stomachs, don't they?"

Not bothering to heat the food up, he plopped some of it on two plates and pushed one towards Eren. "Hang on... let me give you a fork..." Levi already had the utensil in his hand when he froze suspiciously. "...wait..."

He showed Eren the fork in trepidation. "You do know what this is, do you?"

Eren grinned again, recognition flicking in his eyes. He quickly flipped his notebook pages.

_Of course!_

"Oh, all right, that's go-"

_It's a DINGLEHOPPER!_

"..."

"...a WHAT?"

The brat was beautiful, as much as Levi hated to admit it. Beautiful... and brainless...

_to be continued..._

* * *

**Yes, I HAD to put the dinglehopper part in there. XD I don't even know if I spelled that right... oh well. Feedback is always appreciated! ^o^**

**Ah, and if I put the wrong German word there or something, feel free to correct me! ^-^"" **


	2. Come on, Honey, Don't Be Shy

**A/N: WOW. O-O" The other day I opened my inbox and got kinda blown away by all the FF mail I received... I guess people like this story? ^O^"**

**Anyway, thank you so much to those who reviewed~ It made me so happy to know that this fic made you happy/smile/laugh/roll on the floor! XD**

* * *

Soft. It was all Levi could think in his half-awake state, frowning a bit as the bright sunlight fell on his eyes. With a quiet groan, he pulled the softness closer to his body, burying his face into the top of it. So soft... and warm. If only he could stay like this forever, with this warm softness pressed against him-

_BANG!_

The sudden noise rudely jolted him out of his peaceful slumber.

"LEVI! I can't believe you're still not up at this time! You lazy-" There was a loud gasp. "AAAAAAAAAAAH! OH MY GOODNESS!"

Levi managed to drag himself up into a sitting position, feeling rather disoriented. "The hell... H-Hanji?" The sight of the bespectacled woman slowly came into focus, her eyes huge behind her lens and her hands covering her mouth in shock.

"Y-you little shirmp you!" Hanji cackled wickedly, her glasses sparkling with mirth. "While I was spending all of this time worrying about your well-being, you were enjoying yourself, weren't you, Levi~"

"_What_?" Shaking the last spells of sleep from his head, Levi sat up straighter and glanced around. To his horror, the "warm softness" was none other than Eren, who was rising beside him, his eyes tired and confused. Catching sight of Levi, however, he immediately brightened.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAH!" Hanji let out another scream at the sight of Eren, causing the poor teen to nearly jump in surprise. "LEVI! How could you!? He looks so young and innocent! IS HE A MINOR? Levi, you should have known better~" Despite her words, the woman was still giggling in a manner that had Levi's eyebrow twitching.

"Hanji," He began in a calmly dangerous tone, massaging his forehead with one hand, "I will give you ten seconds to get the fuck out of my house. Now LEAVE."

"But Levi! I've never known you to be one for cuddling after sex~! He's so cute! What's his name!? You topped, Levi, didn't you, you monster shrimp-"

"It's _not_ like that, you fucking weirdo! Get out NOW before I skin you alive!"

"But-"

"HANJI."

"All right, all right, I'm leaving! I'll give you _alone_ time with your cute little uke!" Hanji quickly dashed out of the bedroom, but not before turning back and saying, "Say, I know we've just met, but could you tell me how Levi-"

"HANJI."

"BYE~~"

Once her footsteps faded away, Levi tried to resist the urge to bury his face in his hands as he recalled the events of the night before.

* * *

Eren was halfway through his lasagna, having become surprisingly good at using the fork (which he still referred as a dinglehopper, despite Levi's firm corrections), when he suddenly paused and touched his throat.

"Hm?" Levi looked up inquisitively from his own plate. "What?" He asked as the teen reached for his notebook.

_My throat feels dry._

"Oh... right, I forgot to get us something to drink..." Levi walked over to the cabinet and rummaged for some cups. "I'll get you some water."

He set a cup in front of Eren before taking a long sip from his own glass. As he drank, Levi felt a pair of eyes on him and glanced up irritably. "...Ah, come on. You _do_ know how to drink water, right?"

Eren nodded slowly, taking his cup with both hands and starting to carefully drink. He soon drained the glass, looking quite satisfied as he set it down.

"...better?"

_Yes! Thank you, Levi!_

"Good..."

Eren suddenly yawned silently, stretching his arms out as he did. Oh great. Now the brat was sleepy...

"Hang on... you can sleep on the couch, I guess..." Levi reluctantly walked over to Eren as the boy nodded and slowly started to stand.

Thankfully, Eren's condition was seeming to improve. He could now stand and even walk a little, with Levi's help, of course.

After covering the brunet with some spare blankets, the black-haired man turned around, eager to get his own well-deserved rest, when-

_Snatch!_ A tan hand suddenly darted out and latched onto his arm, causing Levi to blink in surprise. He swiveled around to Eren, who seemed just as shocked by his own action.

"..."

"..."

"..._what_?"

"..." Eren hastily released Levi's arm, shrinking back onto the couch and turning away, as if to say "Nothing..."

Unfortunately, Levi knew better than that. "...You shitty brat. You don't want me to leave you, do you?"

Eren simply buried himself deeper into the couch, as if protesting against Levi's words.

Levi put a hand to his forehead, gritting his teeth in frustration. After several seconds of considering the situation, then deciding he did not care anymore, Levi jerked his head up, scowling deeply at Eren. "Fine... FINE! I had to carry you, partially bathe you, clothe you, educate you, feed you... at this point, it doesn't matter anymore! We might as well sleep in the same bed! ...my god that sounded so wrong..."

Still grumbling, he bent down to pick up Eren again and carry him to Levi's bedroom.

* * *

_Present time..._

Now thoroughly confused, Eren paused before picking up his notebook and writing.

_Who was that, Levi?_

"...I'll tell you later..." Levi mumbled, getting off the bed.

_What was she talking about, Levi? I didnt understand alot of what she said._

"...There's a damn space between 'a' and 'lot', brat. She... made a misunderstanding."

Eren tilted his head, still not comprehending Levi's words. Levi sighed. "Listen, Eren, if she or anyone asks, DON'T say that we... ...well, we slept together."

"..." Eren started to write-

"Don't, don't, I _know_ we did, but, sleeping together... it can also mean having sex." Levi explained frankly, hoping dearly that he would not have to clarify the last word. "And we did NOT have sex."

To his relief, Eren's mouth opened in a slight "O" shape as he nodded his head in understanding.

_But what should I say when people ask me?_

"...just say that nothing happened, and that it's the damn truth."

_That is confusing though. How can the same words have different meanings?_

"It's complicated." Levi replied shortly. "Now, let's just get on with the day and I'll introduce you to her properly once I've gotten this mess straightened out."

_Okay, Levi!_

* * *

_Several hours later..._

After Levi opened the door, Erwin gave him a brief nod before looking curiously behind him. "Levi, I heard-"

"There he is, the monster shrimp!" Hanji brightly popped up behind him. "Get him, police chief! Arrest this NEET for having sex with a-"

Levi rolled his eyes. "For the LAST fucking time, Hanji, _NOTHING_ happened. He's mentally like a damn five-year-old and you know I don't go for that shit. Just look at him. He practically _oozes_ smiles and rainbows and all that other crap..." He motioned towards Eren, who, sitting on the couch, smiled nervously and held up his notebook.

_Hello! My name is Eren Yeager! It is nice to meet you!_

Erwin returned the smile warmly, stepping inside and extending a hand towards the teenager. "Hello, Eren. My name is Erwin Smith. I'm the police chief of this town. It's nice to meet you-"

The blond was roughly pushed to the side as Hanji leapt forward, grasping both of Eren's hands eagerly, practically salivating in excitement. "It's a pleasure, a pleasure, Eren! I'm known as Dr. Zoe to the town, but you can just call me Dr. Hanji!"

A bit taken aback at Hanji's approach, the brunet nodded. He freed one of his hands to write on his notebook.

_Chief Erwin and Dr. Hanji, are you Levis friends? _Without waiting for a reply, Eren flipped to another page.

_Levi says mean things, but hes still very kind! He carried me in from the beach and gave me a place to stay! He even taught me the right way to use a dinglehopper! _

"Er... I beg your pardon?"

"Levi did WHAT?"

"Tch. Don't say anymore than necessary, you shitty brat."

Ignoring Levi's comment, Eren continued to write, a determined look on his face.

_So, please dont think he did anything bad to me, Dr. Hanji._

Hanji stared at the notebook page before biting her lip and dancing in place like an insane fangirl. "EEEEEEEEEEEEEEE~! He's so CUUUUUUUUUUTE! Oh, Levi, I can now understand why you cuddled with him! I would h-"

_BAM! _A large, hard-cover book collided with the doctor's face, missing her glasses by a millimeter and effectively cutting off the rest of her squealing. "If there was any choice, I wouldn't let you near Eren for his own safety, but unfortunately, you're the only doctor in this damn town."

A loud barking from Bean prevented any further conversation as another large sheepdog nosed its way into Levi's living room.

"Oh! Sonny!" Hanji exclaimed, hurrying over to the sheepdog's side. "Forgive me! I was so distracted because of Eren that I forgot about you!"

"God damn it, Hanji, did you have to bring him!? That mutt's even worse than Bean!"

Eren's head darted back and forth between the two identical canines, before hurriedly scribbling in his notebook.

_There are 2 Beans!_

Hanji laughed. "No, Eren, this is Bean's brother, Sonny! They look a lot alike, but Sonny is a lot less energetic than Bean! Would you like to play with them?"

Eren bobbed his head up and down, already sliding off the couch towards the dogs.

"Not in the living room!" Levi quickly intervened, holding an arm out to stop the brunet. "If you have to play with those mutts, go to the kitchen! That place is easier to clean..."_  
_

Eren flashed him a dazzling smile before nodding and hobbling off with Bean and Sonny.

Levi raised an eyebrow as he went. "His walking's improved a lot..." He remarked to Erwin and Hanji once the brat had exited the living room.

Hanji smirked. "Are you _sure_ that he wasn't having trouble for a _different_ reason, Levi?"

"Hanji, DROP IT ALREADY."

"Right, right~"

Before a squabble could commence, Erwin spoke up. "I'm assuming that this Eren is the reason why you called us here on our day off, Levi?"

The black-haired man nodded, slowly sinking down into the couch. "I need that brat out of here, Erwin, but I have no clue where the fuck he came from."

"How exactly did you come by him?"

Levi groaned. "Don't get me started on that..."

"I'm afraid we must..."

Much to Erwin and Hanji's surprise, the clean freak soon launched into a rare rant, complaining about all that had happened the other day, from having to carry Eren home to the "dinglehopper" incident.

"He didn't know how to use the toilet, a FUCKING toilet for hell's sake!"

"Levi, that's the fifth time you've said that..."

"Well, I think it's a pretty fucking big deal! Don't you!?"

"Of... of course, but-" Erwin was once again interrupted by Hanji's evil-sounding laughter. "AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA~"

"..." The two men stared at her before Levi finally spoke up monotonously.

"Oi, crazy person."

At that, Hanji quickly bit back her chuckles. "Ahaha, sorry, guys, but isn't it obvious why Eren acts like he does?"

"...do tell..."

"Eren's... a MERMAID!" The doctor declared happily.

"..."

"..."

Levi turned his head to the side disdainfully. "What was Harvard thinking, really, accepting that _thing_ into its medical school-"

"Oh come ON! Doesn't it all make sense!?" Hanji implored, wringing her hands desperately. "He had trouble walking, can't talk, didn't know how to use a toilet, and thinks that forks are _dinglehoppers_! Coincidence? I think not, my dear grumpy shrimp, I think not!"

"Hanji, I know this is asking a lot from you, but be _reasonable_ for once. There are no such things as mermaids!" Levi deadpanned, his narrow eyes glaring daggers.

"But doesn't it all just _scream_ mermaid to you!?" Hanji paused. "On second thought, he would actually be a merman, a former merman, at that, but that's not the point!"

"No, it is not the point." Levi agreed, throwing an arm over the couch lazily. "The point is that he is not a mermaid, or merman, and has never been one. He is just a very confused child that needs help."

"You said that he claimed to know how to read and write, but ended up breaking half of your pencil supply because he used too much force! You know how I think Eren used to write!? He must have written with rocks against rock underwater! It's crude, and requires a lot of force, and that's why his writing is so big and messy!"

"How would mermaids even be able to read and write in the first place? Or understand English, for that matter!"

Hanji shrugged, not deterred. "I'm pretty sure even a merperson would be able to pick up the language if they hung around the docks enough... you even said how he found drinking water weird! That's because he's never had to _drink_ water, Levi! He was dressed in _rags_ when you found him, wasn't he!?"

"Rags which I need to burn sometime today, thank you for reminding me."

"You also said he was making gestures at his throat and the sea! Eren was probably trying to explain that he gave up his voice to leave the ocean!"

"...Like I said before, he is just a-"

"Aah-aah-aah, the fact that you're trying to repeat yourself means you have no more comebacks! Admit it already, Levi, you've fallen for a fish~!"

"God damn it, Hanji!"

"For a guy who used to write fiction for a living, you're pretty against this theory..."

"There are several things wrong with that statement. One, I wrote _realistic_ fiction, not fantasy. Two, are you aware of the meaning of fiction? It means 'not real'. This just happens to be real life. Go figure!"

"Erwin, you believe me, don't you?" The police chief tried not to wince as Hanji fixed her pleading brown eyes on him.

"I-"

"Don't insult Erwin! He'd never believe in that kind of shit!" Levi snapped, crossing his legs.

"Why doesn't Hanji give the boy an examination?" Erwin hastily suggested in a tone meant to calm the two down. "For all we know, Eren might have suffered some sort of trauma or abuse that caused him to lose his voice."

"Exactly." Levi said dryly, still glowering at Hanji.

"Fine!" With a huff, the doctor skipped out of the room, swinging a large black bag that seemed to have appeared out of nowhere. "Eren! Let me give you a quick checkup~! I promise it won't hurt!"

Levi resisted the urge to roll his eyes again. If he didn't know Hanji better, he'd insist on being there in case she tried to traumatize the poor boy, but Hanji wouldn't fool around when it came to her patients. At least, Levi hoped so.

"Do you want me to report him as a missing person?" Erwin questioned once Hanji was gone from the room.

"...I just want you to find his relatives. His family. His guardians. His tribe. Anyone..."

Erwin nodded obediently. "I'll see what I can do. But... just to give you a heads up, this is a pretty rural area, Levi. If I can't find anything..."

"You'll find something. I am not going to watch over him for the rest of my life!"

"No one is saying you will..." The blond man reassured, sitting on a chair across Levi. "Don't take this the wrong way, but I can't help think about what Hanji has been saying... There is something that seems to be... strange about the boy."

"I'm pretty sure there's some things strange about Hanji as well, Erwin."

Erwin sighed. "You know what I mean..." He gazed in the direction of the sea. "Unusual events occur here. Unexplainable incidents."

"You're taking Hanji's side, aren't you?"

"I'm not taking either of your sides. I'm just telling you to keep an open mind."

"_Mermaids_, Erwin, mermaids."

"...I... I agree it is a dubious topic..." The police chief hastily changed the subject. "On the other hand, Levi, it's the first time I've ever seen you treat someone in such a manner."

Levi gave him the weirdest expression he could muster. "Don't you get started on _that_ too, Erwin. I treat everyone in the same manner."

Erwin could not help smiling again. "But Levi, I can't recall you being so... affected by another person..."

His former high school classmate snorted derisively. "He is a disgusting brat. You know I don't go for those types."

"You don't seem to go for any kind of type..." Erwin murmured, still grinning, much to Levi's annoyance. "I wonder, though, perhaps Eren suffers from some sort of amnesia that reverted him to the mind state of a toddler... It would explain why he doesn't understand certain things..."

Levi immediately shook his head. "Nah. He can actually hold his shit in and he knows what sex is."

"..."

"...He does?"

"Yes."

"...and... if I may ask, how did such a subject come up in our conversation?"

"He didn't understand what Hanji was misunderstanding earlier."

"Oh..."

They remained sitting for a short while before Levi abruptly stood up. "Hanji must be done with his check-up already."

The two walked the short distance to the kitchen, Levi entering first. "So, Hanji, how is h-" The writer instantly froze as he took in the scene before him, shock slowly contorting his facial features.

"Ah, Levi, you're here!" Hanji chirped cheerfully, turning away form Eren. "Doesn't he look absolutely adorable!?"

Eren was sitting on the edge of the kitchen table, grinning shyly at Levi. Usually, Levi would throw a fit about how horribly unsanitary it was to have a butt on the kitchen table, but the fact that Eren was clothed in a **maid dress** temporarily sent his mind shutting down. _  
_

"..."

"...sorry." Levi suddenly apologized, his eyes not leaving Eren. "I must have entered the wrong room." With that, he promptly slammed the door shut, leaving Hanji and Eren staring at the closed entrance for several seconds.

"..."

"..."

Suddenly, the door burst open, revealing a very angry short person. "HANJI ZOE! WHY THE FUCK IS HE WEARING THAT, THAT, THAT, THAT, **THAT _THING_**!?"

"You like it!" Hanji exclaimed, clapping her hands together. "I knew you would!"

"WHERE THE HELL DID YOU EVEN _GET_ THAT THING FROM?"

The doctor smiled evilly, her eyes invisible from the glare of her glasses. "I have my secrets, eheeheehee..."

Choosing to temporarily ignore her, Levi stormed into the room. "Eren!" He cried in an uncharacteristically wild manner, placing his hands on the boy's bare shoulders (it was a very revealing maid dress). "I'm so sorry! I should have known better than to leave you alone with that abdominal excuse of a woman! Don't worry! You can take it off now!"

Taken aback, Eren blinked at him for several seconds before reaching for his notebook and writing. As he showed the page to Levi, the man froze once again, his body rigid in horror upon reading the words.

_But Levi, I like it!_

"...No... no... no... Eren, you're really confused now... Hanji brainwashed you... snap out of it, now..."

Still puzzled, the brunet began scribbling again.

_I dont know what youre talking about, Levi, but I really do like it! Its a lot better than pants! My legs feel more free!_

To emphasize his message, Eren swung his legs in the air several times. Feeling a slight breeze caused by Eren's movement, Levi glanced down, saw the lacy skirt, and quickly jerked his gaze back up. "You... you..."

"You know, Levi, for someone who _seems_ against Eren wearing that maid dress, you sure are pretty close to him..." Hanji observed slyly, holding back snickers as a bemused Erwin took in the whole situation.

As if he suddenly realized how many antigens he was possibly coming into contact with, Levi hastily let go of Eren's shoulders, and was about to back away when Hanji strolled casually up to the pair.

"Oh dear, my hand slipped~" She drawled dramatically before slapping Eren's back, causing the boy to crash into Levi's arms.

"Ah-" Caught unawares, Levi fell to the ground. "Urgh..." He looked up to see Eren's surprised eyes staring back at him, the cross-dressing boy splayed awkwardly on Levi's lap.

"..."

"..."

"..."

Keeping a stone-faced expression, Levi stood up and then helped Eren stand as well, his movements stiffer than a wooden doll. He then looked toward to Hanji and Erwin, the former unsuccessfully attempting to hold back giggles while the corner of the latter's mouth twitched.

"...NOT. A. WORD." Levi spat out in a warning tone, turning his back to Eren.

There was short silence until Levi heard the sound of unbuckling. Horrified, he turned again and found Eren starting to take off the dress off. "What. The fuck. Are you. Doing!?"

The boy held up his notebook, a sheepish expression on his face.

_It makes you angry, Levi, so I decided to take it off._

"Oh. Good. Just... do it another room. You don't change your clothes in front of other people."

Eren's hand twitched, as if he was going to write a response, but the teenager decided against it, and exited the room, picking up Levi's spare clothes which had been lying on the floor. Bean and Sonny, who both hadn't understood a thing, lumbered after him.

"..."

"..."

Once Eren was out of ear shot, Hanji finally let her giggles loose, collapsing to the ground in mirth as she pounded the floor with her fist.

Levi simply gave her look of deep disgust.

"OH LEVI~~~~ THAT WAS PRICELESS! **PRICELESS**!"

"I have to admit, Levi..." Erwin began, the corner of his mouth continuing to twitch, "that was the first time I've ever seen you looking so uncomfortable..."

"Stop. Stop it. Both of you. Stop it. Just stop it." Seething in rage, Levi pulled out a chair and sat down in it with far more force than necessary. "So did you actually check if he was hurt or not or did you spend the whole time making him crossdress?"

Hanji's laughter slowly subsided, the doctor giving a few hiccups before picking herself off of Levi's floor. "Ahahahaha... oh, of course not, Levi... I gave him a full checkup! We finished early, though, so I decided to have a little fun~!"

Erwin coughed loudly into his fist before turning to Hanji with a serious expression. "So... what's your report, Hanji?"

The doctor drew herself a chair before speaking, a grin still present on her face. "Well, Erwin, Levi, from what I can tell here, Eren is fine. There doesn't seem to be anything physically wrong with his throat or his legs..."

"Then he might have had some sort of psychological trauma..." Levi mused, voicing Erwin's suggestion from earlier.

"I did take that in account," Hanji acknowledged, pushing up her glasses in a rare professional manner. "But Eren doesn't show any key signs of psychological trauma..."

"Hah..."

"Moving on to his legs..." the doctor continued, crossing her arms, "His legs are a little... weird."

"...meaning?"

"His legs aren't injured, Levi. In fact, they're fine."

"Then care to explain why he can only hobble around like a one year old?"

"Because he's not used to walking on them. It's as if Eren's legs have just recovered from a long-term injury... but the thing wrong with that explanation is that there's no _sign_ of any long-term injury. In fact, there isn't a single mar on his legs."

Hanji paused, looking like she was about to crack a joke, but stopped at a warning look from Erwin. "It's what's weird about his legs..."

Levi frowned, a little confused. "I don't get it. So he spent his life in a big air bubble? What's so weird about that?"

"It's weird, Levi, because the rest of Eren's body has its fair share of scars and markings and what not. So... why does only the top of his body have scars while his legs are... well, flawless? It doesn't make sense..."

"He spent his life with his legs in a big air bubble." Levi said in a bored tone. Inside, however, he found himself recalling the first time he watched Eren trying and failing to stand...

_It was as if he never stood before_.

The thought passed through his mind before Levi could stop it, but he quickly dismissed it. "Maybe the brat's foreign or from some distant water tribe of caveman... are you _sure_ about the no-physical/psychological trauma thing?"

Hanji shrugged. "Pretty sure. I guess we could go to the hospital in town tomorrow and I could give him a more thorough examination (Ooh, that sounds pretty kinky, heehee). You could even give Eren a tour afterwards!"

Pretending not to hear the last suggestion, Levi nodded curtly. "All right. I'll bring him in early, before you'll get any patients."

"Okay~"

"I'll come as well." Erwin volunteered. "I can't have you biting each other's heads off."

Levi gave both of them a nod. "...thanks."

"No problem~"

They stood together quietly for a few moments until a crash was heard from the other room. Before Hanji or Erwin could say anything, Levi swiftly headed over in the sound's direction, his lips pursed in dread.

He found Eren lying on the ground, tangled in Levi's pants. Apparently, the brat had been struggling with the piece of clothing for the last fifteen minutes.

"..."

_LEVI! HELP ME!_

"...Tch. Damn brat."

* * *

**...Yes, Eren knows to use commas, but doesn't know how to use apostrophes... I'm not exactly sure how that works but I think commas are a lot more simpler than apostrophes, right? ^-^""**

**Sorry for putting Tsukkomi!Levi in, but I just couldn't resist. X)**

**Reviews make me mentally dance around like a crazy person~**


	3. Tour of the Kingdom

**A/N: So I checked my mail and then literally danced around the room like a crazy person. Yes, this is what you awesome reviewers do to me. XD The speediness of this chapter is thanks to you guys! **

* * *

_Flick._ _Flick. Flick. Flick. _

Eren watched the lights in fascination before turning the switch another time.

_Flick._ The lights went out.

_Flick. _The lights went back on.

_Flick._ Darkness.

_Flick._ Light.

_Flick. _"At this rate, you're going to make my electricity bill sky rocket, you know..."

The brunet whirled around at Levi's voice, brandishing his notebook gleefully.

_LEVI! This is so amazing!_

_Flip! _Eren turned to another page.

_ It's almost as amazing as the water coming from the kitchen and the bathroom!_

"...That's very nice."

_How does it work, Levi!?_

"It's called electricity."

_Elicktreecity? _

"Yeah."

_How does that work!?_

"...magic." The man muttered, pulling on a dark jacket as Eren continued to gaze at the lights in sheer admiration. "Come on, brat, we don't have all day."

_Oh, I know what that means! _

Another flip.

_It means you have to hurry up!_ Eren beamed proudly at Levi, as if expecting a reward. Oddly enough, the man couldn't bring himself to disappoint the teenager.

"Maybe you're not a _total_ idiot after all." Levi remarked dryly, sliding his hands in his pockets. "Now, let's get into the car. We need it to go to Hanji's hospital. You know what a car is, right?"

Eren's eyes lit up in excitement again.

_Ooh! I've seen cars before, but this is my first time seeing one up so close!_

"..." Why was Levi not surprised...

After he had helped the damn brat put his pants on (much to Hanji and Erwin's silent amusement), Levi had spent the rest of yesterday teaching Eren exactly what apostrophes were. Once the lesson was over, the man thought his brain was on the verge of splitting open from sheer impatience, but at least Eren was a fast learner.

_Bean isn't coming with us?_

"Damn mutt can be more destructive than you. He'll be fine alone. More importantly, do you know how to ride a car?" Levi questioned, opening the passenger door for Eren as the boy approached the vehicle like one might approach a wild animal.

Eren nodded cautiously, sliding into the seat.

_I sit here._

"Good." Levi commented, slamming the door shut before striding over to driver's seat. Looking like he was about to embark on a wild rollercoaster ride, Eren continued to scribble, sweat forming on his forehead.

_Levi sits there... and then the car MOVES! Like a boat!_

Levi shook his head. "Forgot one thing." Reaching across Eren, he grabbed the seat belt, pretending not to notice the teen's sudden tenseness when Levi's hand accidentally brushed against his arm.

"It's a seat belt," Levi explained, now putting on his own and starting the car. Eren gave a little start at the engine's hum. "It's supposed to protect you in case the car gets into an accident."

_Okay... Levi, what's this button?_

Before Levi could even identify which button Eren was referring to, the inquisitive brunet had already pushed it. The car window promptly opened, as did Eren's mouth.

_LEVI!_ His hands actually shaking in excitement, the brunet almost shoved the notebook in Levi's face.

_The car window! It DISAPPEARED!_

"Hn. Don't touch too many things." He could already picture Eren accidentally setting the airbags off. "Pull the button and the window'll come back up." Levi began to drive, keeping one eye on the road and the other on Eren, who was now attempting to hang his head out of the window.

"...don't complain if a bunch of bugs come splattering in your eyes and mouth..." Levi warned, but the teenager paid him no heed, too fascinated with the trees and what not flashing by.

Levi decided to concentrate on the road.

A few peaceful minutes passed by before he spared Eren another glance, only to see the lower half of the teenager's body, the rest was hanging out of the car window.

"...Eren!?"

His seat belt stretched to the limit, Eren braced his arms against the car door as he reveled in the wind blowing his hair, the green eyes sparkling in wonder at the speeding car tires.

"..." As nice as the view of Eren's butt was (Levi did NOT just think that), the black-haired man hastily snatched a fistful of Eren's shirt and yanked the brat back into his seat. "Do you have a death wish, brat!?"

His hair now thoroughly tousled, Eren pouted.

_I'm not a brat, Levi! It felt so nice!_

"You just keep telling yourself that, brat."

"..."

* * *

Despite the fact that he was banned from sticking his head out of the window for the rest of the car ride, Eren still appeared to have enjoyed himself.

As Levi stopped the car and pulled him out, the teenager continued to look around, captivated at the sight of the large hospital building.

_Levi, I know this building! I've seen it before!_

"You have?"

_Yup! I never knew it was a hospital though..._

Levi furrowed his brow in confusion. Eren acted as if he had never seen the town before, let alone a specific building.

A loud slamming noise interrupted his thoughts, Hanji jumping out to greet them. "EREN~~ Good morning, my adorable little merman~"

"Oi, oi, don't go touching him weirdly!" Levi said warily, raising an arm in front of Eren.

_Good morning, Dr. Hanji!_

"Eren, Levi didn't do anything to you since last time, did he!?"

_He took me for a car ride just now! It was really fun!_

"Hahaha, I see!" Elbowing Levi aside, Hanji put a hand behind Eren and began to guide him inside the hospital. "Well, today, I'm going to perform some tests on you, er, see how your body is doing, basically. You'll be okay, won't you? Levi'll take you around town to make up for it!"

"I am NOT!"

Opening his mouth in a silent laugh, Eren nodded, holding up his notebook.

_If you say so, Dr. Hanji!_

Levi rubbed the back of his head as he followed the two across the white hospital floors. "She'd... probably be good with children..."

"You really think so?" Erwin questioned behind him. Levi turned to acknowledge him, noting the newly formed dark circles underneath the man's eyes.

"...Well, if she doesn't blow the kids up first..."

Erwin gave a soft chuckle. "Very true..." His eyes soon grew serious. "About Eren, though... I have news. And you're not going to like it."

Levi blinked expectantly, giving the blond his full attention.

"Ever since we left your house, Levi, I've been calling and looking up info everywhere..." Erwin began slowly, a frown forming on his features. "And there's no one with the surname of Yeager."

Levi could feel a sense of dread stirring in his stomach. "There must be someone-"

Erwin threw his hands up in the air, a rare look of helplessness on his face. "Levi, I've looked up everything I possibly could. There's no one registered with the surname of Yeager, or even an alternate version of Yeager, not here, not in the state, not in the country, not even in Germany! (You're lucky I took those German language classes at the university...) The Yeager I could find was a fictional protagonist of some popular Japanese manga and anime..."

Levi took a deep breath, running a tired hand through his hair. He knew Erwin well, he knew not many could perform more thorough searches than the police chief, but... "He... he must be adopted."

"If he is adopted, then there's no record of his family's death. Or existence, for that matter..." Erwin murmured. "And I've checked every single missing child reports in the last two decades, Levi. None of them come even _close_ to matching Eren's description..."

"..." Levi shook his head, whether in denial or not, he wasn't sure. "It... it can't be. Something will come up. Maybe Yeager isn't even his real name. Maybe he lied."

"It could be possible." Erwin agreed mildly, but his eyes remained unconvinced.

"Please don't say you're starting to believe Hanji."

"Levi, I-"

"Erwin, it's Hanji. Soon, she'll be going on about how there will be human-eating giants ruling the earth or some other crap..."

"..."

"Hey!" Both looked up at the sounds of Hanji's boisterous voice. "How long are you guys going to stand there? We're nearly done with all of the tests!"

Well, that was rather fast- WAIT a minute-

Levi's eyes widened in sudden horror. "Please don't tell me you've shoved him in a dress again!" He practically shrieked, stomping towards the doctor.

"...well, I did _try_, but Eren refused, saying it would make you unhappy..." Levi ignored her and bolted into the room.

Fortunately for Levi's sanity, Eren was still dressed in normal clothes. Perched on the metal table, he swung his legs around aimlessly, smiling when he saw Levi and Erwin.

"Hello, Eren."

_Good morning, Chief Erwin!_

Hanji plopped down upon a spinning chair and spun around several times before speaking. "I've finished all the x-rays, it'll take some time before we can properly see them, though. I've given Eren a few psychological tests, but so far, he's been fine..."

"..."

"...In other words, he could still be a mer-"

"Eren, let me ask you a question." Levi began as he leaned against a cabinet. Perhaps the best way to disprove Hanji's ridiculous mermaid theory was to be direct as possible.

Eren perked up.

"Why _can't_ you talk? I can tell that you were able to talk before, shitty brat."

The brunet shrugged.

_I can't talk because I don't have a voice._

"...no shit." Levi rolled his eyes. "Let me rephrase my question then. Why the hell don't you have a voice?"

_Because my voice was the best part of me._

"...huh?"

Erwin decided to try as well. "Eren, would you mind telling us where your parents are?"

Another shrug.

_I'm pretty sure they're both dead._

"...What about other relatives? Family friends?"

_...I don't know. It's kind of hard, actually, to tell who your relatives are..._

"...eh?"

Hanji chuckled tiredly on her chair. "Nice try, guys, I tried that approach too. But I only get vague answers or ones that don't make sense..." She turned to Eren as well. "Let's try to figure out Eren's views of beauty! Eren, what do you think is beautiful?"

Eren paused, then pointed eagerly towards the window where one could see the sky, which was a bright deep blue at the moment.

Hanji brightened up immediately. "Oh, yes, indeed, it's quite a lovely day today, isn't it? What else is beautiful to you?"

His hand pointed downward towards the ocean.

"Ah, indeed! Hmm... what about a... an animal?"

"..."

_Bean and Sonny?_

"Aww, you're such a sweet kid, Eren!" Hanji's glasses sparkled mischievously. "...how about something beautiful that's... smaller?"

_Something small and beautiful?_

"Yeah, beautiful, but small, smaller than the ocean or Bean and Sonny..."

Eren's hand shot out, the next second, the teen suddenly snatched his hand back, but it had unmistakably been in a certain "shrimp"'s direction.

"..."

Eren's face grew steadily red as he hastily scribbled on his notebook, his handwriting even more unstable and messy than usual.

_SEA SLUGS! I think SEA SLUGS are really beautiful!_

"...righhhhhhhht..." Hanji couldn't resist giving a few cackles. Even Erwin had to smile good-naturedly.

Levi felt his eye twitch. Anymore of these shitty attempts at match-making and he would barf. Eren was only a kid. A fucking kid! ...come to think of it... "...brat... how old are you?"

His face still a little red, Eren seemed grateful at the change of subject, but hesitated, as if he didn't want to answer.

"What? You can tell me, Eren..." Shit. If he was being shy like that, Eren must definitely be underage. ...Not that Levi was hoping Eren wouldn't be underage, it didn't matter a bit to him, not a bit-

"Tell him fifteen, Eren!" Hanji interjected happily. "Make Levi suffer in hell for three years!"

"HANJI!"

"Just tell the truth, Eren, it'll be fine..." Erwin reassured as the brunet began to write on his notebook.

All three unconsciously took a breath as Eren showed them the page-

_I actually don't know._

"..."

"..."

"..."

"You WHAT?"

Eren blinked, then showed them his notebook again, as if to repeat his message.

Levi looked ready to tear flesh, whether his own or someone else's, it was unclear. "_Why_?"

Erwin scratched his head nervously. "Eren... you must have _some_ vague idea of how old you are... eighteen? Nineteen, perhaps?"

A little disturbed by Levi's expression, Eren gave another shrug before writing again.

_It's not very important where I'm from..._

"Not important!?" Levi growled, crossing his arms. "Apparently, where you're from, age is not important, you can't tell if you're fucking your own aunt, and there's NO toilet or shower! Are you from hell!?"

"Levi! It's not polite to insult the merpeople like that!"

"Actually..." Erwin stood up, noticing a world map conveniently posted on Hanji's wall. "Eren, maybe you could point out where you're from." He motioned the curious teenager to the map. "You know what this is, right?"

_Yup! It's a map!_

Erwin nodded. "Correct. To let you know, Levi is originally from this area... Hanji is originally from here... and I'm originally from here..." The police chief explained calmly, pointing to each place on the map. "And right now, we're all here. Can you show me where you came from, Eren?"

Eren brought a hand up to his chin thoughtfully, staring at the map. His fingers delicately traced over the worn paper until they came to a sudden stop. Eren studied the spot carefully as the three former high school classmates watched on.

"...that's where you're from, Eren?"

"..."

The brunet gave a nod in confirmation.

Flip. _I'm pretty sure, Chief Erwin. I've seen maps before and was told I came from there._

"...E-Eren... you are aware that-"

"Brat, you can't be from there." Levi said bluntly, causing Eren to give him a look of confusion.

_Why do you say that, Levi?_

"BECAUSE. You're only pointing to WATER. That's not a country. Blue is not a country. Choose ANOTHER color."

The spot was indeed in the ocean, the North Atlantic Ocean, to be specific, just above the shore of Germany.

_But, I'm from this place, Levi! I would never forget it!_

"You are not!"

"HAH! You see that, Levi!? He's from the OCEAN! What more proof do you need!?"

"Will you STOP that, Hanji!? Just forget it already! We're trying to find Eren's _age_ here!"

"Oh ho, so you are concerned about how old Eren is?"

"It's an important piece of information that can help identify him-"

"Admit it, you just want to know Eren's age so you'll be safe to fuc-"

"Finish that sentence and this hospital will go up in flames, you she-devil."

Hanji gasped in mock horror. "You wouldn't dare..."

"You know I would." Levi shot back. "Who else would have been able to destroy your make-shift lab back in high school?"

"WHAT? That was YOU, Levi!?"

"...you intelligent dumbass. You never realized it?"

"SERIOUSLY?"

Seeming deaf to the racket in front of him, Eren, deep in thought, began to write again on his notebook.

_Does anyone know how old the lighthouse here is?_

"Eh?" Hanji, in the middle of shaking Levi's jacket collar, paused to glance at the brunet. "The lighthouse... Wow, I didn't know you knew about that, Eren... erm... ...hang on... it's on the tip of my tongue... erm..."

Levi, completely unfazed, turned to Eren with the same expression. "Hmph. You've already forgotten about what we were talking about, haven't you?"

Hanji had already released Levi's collar and was pacing the room restlessly. "I... I know it, I know it, I know it, um... it's... the light house is... seven hundred and ninety one years old?"

"I believe it's one hundred and seventy nine years old as of this year, Eren." Erwin said kindly. "Why do you ask?"

"...damn. At least I was close..."

"Close my ass."

"Q-quiet, Levi, Eren's writing something else!"

_Dr. Hanji, is it all right if I use that chalkboard over there?_

"The chalkboard?" Hanji turned bemusedly towards the dark green object. "Oh, of course. Go ahead. Go crazy. Break it in half for all I care."

"...Hanji, don't you think you should show a _little_ more care for your possessions?"

"Nah, it's all good..."

Eren slowly walked towards the chalkboard, and, picking up a piece of chalk, began to make several marks. "..."

Levi frowned again. What in the world was the brat up to now? "Oi, Eren, do you really need to do that much math to figure out your age?"

Continuing as if he hadn't heard Levi, Eren gave his work a scrutinizing glance before nodding in a satisfied manner. Making sure that he had everyone's attention, the boy wrote upon the chalkboard.

_I think I know my age now!_

"Oh, really? That's wonderful~!"

Still using the chalkboard, Eren began writing numbers.

_1... 9..._

"Nineteen?" Levi read out aloud, raising his eyebrows. Almost a generation below him, but at least the kid wasn't a minor- ...wait, why was he even thinking about such things?

To his mild confusion, however, Eren shook his head and continued writing.

_1... 9... 4..._

"..."

"HUH?"

_194. I am 194 years old._

Setting the chalk piece down, Eren turned, smiling brightly at the three confounded humans.

"..."

"..."

Hanji was the first to break down. "BUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Clutching her sides in mirth, the doctor fell back into her chair. "AHAHAHAHAHAHA! And to think that LEVI was the older one! Well, Levi, looks like you REALLY have nothing to worry about now, ahahahahahahahaha! He's DEFINITELY legal!"

"..." Erwin said nothing, studying the chalkboard as if making sure he was seeing the right numbers.

Levi, his face grim and determined, marched over to the chalkboard. "Eren, I think you make a mistake."

Eren frowned before writing again. _I did not! I thought Levi might say that, so I checked twice! I'm 194 years old!_

"No... no. You can't be. Eren, people don't live that long."

_Levi, I am! _A scowl was beginning to grow on Eren's face as Hanji continued to guffaw wildly.

"No... you meant nineteen _point_ four years old, right? It's a common mistake, to forget the decimal point like that..."

_I don't even know what that is! Why won't you believe me?_

"Eren, you're a HUMAN!" Levi snapped, his temporary patience beginning to fade quickly. "It's impossible!"

"Ah, but not impossible for a mermaid, Levi... eheeheeehee, I bet you're just upset because Eren might be more experienced in bed than you, huh!?"

"Hanji-"

Eren went back for his notebook, as the chalkboard was now full of his scribbling. He tapped Levi's shoulder gently to get his attention. "Hmm?"

_Levi, do you hate mermaids?_

"..." Levi stared at Eren as if the brunet had grown a tail. What... what kind of question was that!? God damn it... Was the brat now looking at him with fucking PUPPY eyes!?

"Yeah, Levi~!" Hanji chimed in evilly, pausing her laughter. "With all your raging about mermaids, you don't seem to like them..."

"I..."

Eren's eyes widened more, the brunet clearly nervous.

"...tch..." Gritting his teeth, Levi snatched an eraser and began erasing the markings on the chalkboard, being careful not to spread any chalk dust. "It-it doesn't matter! They don't exist, so there's no point in liking or hating them!"

_Oh, okay..._

"Come on, Levi, you KNOW he's a mermaid~ Now give him the kiss of true love so Eren'll be human forever!" With that, Hanji suddenly kicked the unsuspecting Levi, sending him flying into Eren.

"AH?"

There was an awkward silence as Levi found himself straddling the brunet. "..."

"..."

Seething in silent rage, Levi slowly raised his head, glowering at his bespectacled friend. "May I ask WHY you find the need to keep throwing us on the ground, you shitty four-eyes!" He hadn't moved from the suggesting position, however, causing poor Eren to wring his hands and blush nervously.

Hanji only wriggled her eyebrows suggestively. "I'm trying to create _DA MOOOOOOD_..."

Levi turned to Erwin. "Erwin, she needs a _doctor_." With that, he slowly got off Eren, helping the boy up again.

For the second time that day, Erwin shrugged helplessly. "Levi, she _is_ a doctor."

"Doesn't mean shit. Take one good look at her, then look at me in the eyes and say she doesn't need help."

"...She doesn't need help, Levi. She's beyond it." Erwin suddenly gave another violent cough. "By the way, Levi, I overheard Hanji saying you were going to give Eren a tour of the town."

"...Erwin, you know I respect you more than anyone (anyone alive at least), but that was such a pathetically lame attempt at changing the subject that it doesn't even count as an attempt. I am _not_ giving him a tour!"

"But LEVI~~~ He's been such a GOOD teenager! ...or should I say bi-centenarian? He's certainly not a teenager, is he now? AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

"_YOU_ are not allowed to speak anymore!"

"It's a FREE country baby~~!"

_Levi, what's a by sentanarian?_

"It's actually not a word, Eren. Don't pay it any attention."

"Don't pay any attention to Levi, Eren! He's not honest with his feelings!"

"Don't pay any attention to Hanji, Eren, you know that already, don't you? It's a common instinct-"

"Don't listen to him, Eren, EREN!"

"Eren, I want you to disregard ANYTHING that comes out of that insane bat's mouth-"

"_EREN_," Erwin interrupted kindly, giving the extremely confused brunet's shoulder a reassuring squeeze, "you don't have to pay attention to either of them." He smiled at Eren in an almost fatherly-like fashion. "I don't suppose you'd know, Eren, but there's a festival going on today and tomorrow night! Maybe if Levi's too grumpy today, he can take you there tomorrow!"

Eren's eyes lit up once more.

_Really, Chief Erwin!? I've never been to a festival before!_

"I'm sure the two of you will be able to have lots of fun..."

"Hey, HEY, what the hell do you think you're doing, Erwin, making plans without the guardian's permission-"

"AHA! So you DO think of yourself as Eren's guardian~?"

"...I can't say a single fucking thing without it being totally misinterpreted!"

* * *

In the end, Levi did give Eren something of a tour. He made it clear that they were certainly NOT going to go to some "fucking festival", Levi claiming he was "too old" for that "sort of shit".

"So that's a building. That's another building. That's another building that's slightly bigger than the other buildings. Okay. Let's go home now."

Eren scowled deeply in protest. _But Levi! You went way too fast!_

Flip. _I wasn't able to look at all the buildings!_

Flip. _Go around again!_

"...We've already went around town at least FIVE fucking times, you brat. If Erwin wasn't the police chief, we'd probably be arrested for looking like potential criminals!"

_We've only went around 4 times!_

"...it was five."

_It was NOT! Unlike Levi, I CAN count!_

"...Eren." Levi only said one word, but amazingly enough, the kid (No matter what anyone said, Eren was still a kid!) got his message. Sticking his lip out sullenly, Eren wrote another page.

_Okay._

"Thank you." Levi couldn't remember a day where he had felt more mentally exhausted. Except for the day before. And maybe the day before that...

Flip. _Levi?_

"Mm?"

Flip. _Can't we go to the festival tomorrow?_

Sighing, Levi accelerated slightly as they left the town. "Festival, huh... I didn't even realize they held festivals here... jeez, what is this, miniature Japan?"

He heard the sound of Eren writing and glanced to him briefly.

_Levi, you don't like festivals?_

"...not particularly."

More scribbling sounds.

_I'm not too surprised by that..._

"...hah, you cheeky brat, are you starting to rub off on me?" Levi rolled his eyes again. Perfect. _Now_ Eren was going to start acting like a teenager. "I hope you appreciate what I go through for you, shitty brat..."

There was a long period of silence, then-

_I do, Levi!_ In the moment he takes to look at Eren, the boy's eyes looked indignant... almost hurt.

Levi hears another flip and turns back to see another message.

_I really liked that maid's dress, you know!_

"..."

Flip. _But I took it off because I know you hate me when I'm in it..._ With that, Eren turned his head resolutely towards the car window, his arms crossed in a sullen manner.

"..."

"..."

Oh sweet Titans... Levi would have grabbed his hair in frustration if his hands were not presently occupied. The brat was actually that _bothered_ about that incident?

"...I didn't hate it." The words were out of his mouth before Levi realized what he was saying. "You wearing the maid dress."

Eren blinked and turned back to Levi, not understanding.

"I-I mean..." Levi actually _stuttered_, catching himself off-guard. Was he feeling GUILTY? Levi, feeling guilty!? Oh great... He might as well start singing like prince charming right now. "...Haaah, damn it, Eren. It's hard for me to explain these types of things. Today, you admitted you thought I was beautiful, right?"

The brunet jerked, as if Levi had kicked him brutally in the face, then scribbled frantically.

_I DIDN'T SAY YOU WERE BEAUTIFUL!_

Flip. _I MEANT THE SEA SLUGS! _

Flip. _SEA SLUGS ARE REALLY BEAUTIFUL!_

"At that time, you felt embarrassed, like you are right now, correct?"

"..." Eren shrank down in his seat, his face now beet red.

Levi spared another glance at him before sighing again. "Well, Eren... that's... that's how I felt when I saw you in that... that dress. O... kay?"

There was an even longer period of silence, and Levi was mildly contemplating whether or not to crash the car into a tree in order to put an end to his humiliation when a sudden thought struck him.

"Hey, Eren.."

Flip. _Yes?_

"...how'd you like to drive?"

Surprised by the sudden offer, Eren blinked even more before a wide grin slowly spread across his face.

"I'll take that as a yes, Yeager."

Against his better judgement, Levi found himself pulling the car over and switching seats with Eren. Maybe this might be a mistake...

...But hardly anyone else used the road beside himself, Eren only needed to drive straight (and only in one gear, too) and if it was really bad, he was more than capable of stopping the brat. What was the worst that could happen, really?

He gave Eren a quick explanation of the controls, and Eren seemed to understand, watching Levi's hands carefully. After Levi started the engine, Eren gripped the steering wheel properly, then hit the acceleration.

All humans, even the great ones, have committed grave mistakes in their lifetimes. Levi was no exception.

_URRRRRRRRKKKKKKKKK!_

The car screeched forward as Eren slammed hard on the pedal with far more force than necessary. "Wait... Eren, hold on, that's-"

_SCREEEEEEEEEECH! _The car zigged and zagged wildly across the path, bumping trees and stones.

"WHOA- AGH- TREE- HEY- NO- GOD DAMN IT, EREN, SLOW THE FUCK DOWN!" Eren's turns were way too exaggerated, as a result, the car swerved right and left every second.

Levi had never one to freak out. Roller-coaster and other thrill rides could never faze him. Nothing could faze him. Or so he thought. Then he met Eren.

"BRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT!" This time, the car barely avoided a large pine tree, bark scraping the paint. "EREN, YOU NEED TO STOP, YOU NEED TO FUCKING STOP!"

What little color Levi usually had in his face drained from it. He looked like a wax corpse as he practically bounced around in his seat. And at the rate things were going, he would soon become one. "YOU SHITTY BRAT! STOP BEFORE YOU'LL KILL US!"

Eren, on the other hand, was having the time of his life. His green eyes giddy with exhilaration, he increased the car's speed even more, much to Levi's horror.

"YOU-" _Bump!_ "LITTLE-" _Bump! _"FUCK-" _SCREECH!_ "ERRRRRRR! ARE YOU EVEN LISTENIN-" _BANG! _"SHIT!"

Eren was not listening. The car continued to zoom around, suddenly veering off the road into the surrounding woods. "E_REN_!"

Still getting tossed around, Levi couldn't believe his eyes as a large gap appeared in their path. A RAVINE!? There was actually a fucking RAVINE here!? Apparently, he needed to get out of the house more often- Levi suddenly realized Eren still wasn't slowing down. "EREN! WAIT! EREN, STOP!"

Eren could see the gap as clear as day. Unlike Levi, however, his face brightened, as if he was being faced with a challenge, and the reckless brunet was only too eager to accept it.

Levi felt his jaw drop, but no longer cared. This was it. This was really it. This brat was going to be the death of him, literally-

_VVVRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRK!_

Amazingly enough, Eren managed to drive over the ravine, the car giving a huge bump, Levi's head colliding painfully with the roof. "OOF!"

For some miraculous reason, Eren's driving immediately slowed down to normal speeds, the boy apparently now content with himself.

"..." Levi spent several dumbstruck minutes staring at the brat and then gawking at the scene behind him and wondering why the hell they were still alive.

He finally regained his senses once they reached the road again. "...Brat... stop the damn car and move the fuck over before I blast your brains out."

* * *

**...Yes, those car scenes were based off of The Little Mermaid. XDDDDDD I just loved that part where Ariel was going crazy with the reins and Eric was all "O-O" **

**But really, Levi makes a terrible tour guide. XD**

**Reviews make these cold hands type faster ;)**


	4. Shalalalalala

**A/N: This chapter is a little later than the others, sorry about that. ^^" **

**I got stuck at the festival part and then unwisely decided to watch Hotarubi no Mori e for references... NOT a good idea if you don't want to become a ball of useless, blubbering mush. T_T" (It's beautiful and worth the pain, though, I would still highly recommend it, both the manga and the movie XD)**

**Thanks for all the reviews! And enjoy the chapter! :D**

* * *

Flip. _Driving was so much fun!_

"...Never again."

Flip. _Thank you so much Levi!_

"NEVER. AGAIN."

Flip. _You're so awesome, Levi!_

"Really, what the hell possessed me back there, handing the wheel over to a..."

Flip. It_ was so fun, Levi! I'm so glad I met you!_

"Flattery will get you fucking nowhere, brat."

Flip. _You looked quite nice when you're all white, Levi._

"You little shit. Are you saying I'd make a good corpse?"

Flip. _Levi, I was wondering..._

"What?"

_Why WERE you embarrassed?_

"...no reason..." Levi muttered, his nerves still a little wracked from Eren's hazardous driving.

Flip. _Do you like maid dresses, Levi?_

"No. I don't go for that shit."

Flip. _Then why were you embarrassed, Levi?_

"Maid dresses are shitty. But yesterday they weren't that shitty."

Flip. _Levi_,_ what do you mean?_

"Sorry, brat, gotta concentrate on the road now."

_LEVI!_

"Safety comes first above all things."

_LEVI IS A LIAR!_

His complexion now fully restored, Levi simply smirked and pretended he didn't see Eren's last note.

But then Eren poked his arm in a-not-so-gentle manner, and before he could help it, Levi already turned back to him, his smirk gone. "What-"

_CAN we go to the festival, Levi?_

Flip. _I really want to see it!_

His eyes flickering back to the road, Levi scowled deeply. "No."

_I'll be good! I promise!_

"No means no, brat."

_PLEASE LEVI!_

"God damn it, Eren, NO. There is no fucking way I'll be taking you to that damn festival tomorrow!"

* * *

"Fuck yeah, you'll be taking Eren to that damn festival tonight." If Hanji was trying to imitate Levi, she was doing a hell of a bad job. The doctor stood in front of them with her arms crossed, her glasses glaring, and an air of stubborn determination.

"..." Levi stared at her emotionlessly, sitting on his porch while an exhausted Eren fiddled with the hose, having finally finished washing Levi's car.

"..."

"..."

"..."

Hanji frowned, her eye visibly twitching from her stiff posture. "O-one of you say something, this is kind of awkward."

Since Eren was incapable of speech, Levi spoke up. "What the hell are you doing on my property, Hanji?"

"Hmph! So rude as usual!" Undeterred, Hanji stomped forward towards the black-haired man. "Come on, Levi, you're not serious, right? I mean, you'll tell Erwin and me that you're not going to take Eren, and you're going to tell Eren you're not going to take him, but in the end, at the very last minute, when Eren is sitting alone all by himself, you'll all be like 'What the hell do you think you're doing, get in the car you damn brat' and then you'll just drive to the festival, that'll happen, right, RIGHT!?" She shook Levi's collar desperately. "I NEED to know that'll happen, Levi!"

Levi simply closed his eyes as his head rocked back and forth violently. "...I stopped listening."

"EHHHHH? FROM WHAT PART?"

"From the moment you started talking."

"LEVIIIIIIIIIIIII!" Hanji wailed, her shaking becoming more and more out of control. "Be REASONABLE! You can't just stay at your home all day, moping around like the little lump you are! Look at Eren! LOOK AT HIM!" She forcefully grabbed Levi's head and twisted it in Eren's direction. "He's so freakin' CUTE! How can you resist such a face!?"

Pausing a moment to hesitantly wave at Hanji, Eren resumed his futile attempts to untangle the garden hose, too tired and preoccupied to figure out what the doctor was actually saying.

"Levi, he's dressed in YOUR clothes! Doesn't that give you an urge to totally dominate his body!?

"...there are so many things wrong with what you're saying that it's not even worth pointing them all out..." Levi muttered, tearing Hanji off of him and soundly throwing her body into a nearby bush before stalking over to the struggling Eren. "Oi, brat, quit it, you'll just end up breaking the hose at this rate."

Eren nodded gratefully, plopping down onto the ground as Levi expertly unwound the tangles.

_RUSTLE!_

"LEVI! TAKE HIM TO THE DAMN FESTIVAL! OR I WILL!"

Levi sent the now disheveled Hanji a glare that nearly caused neighboring trees to shrivel up. "Don't make me strangle you with the hose, Hanji. It would be doing the hose a dishonor."

"But Eren wants to go so badly!"

"I am NOT taking the brat out in public! I can already see the disasters happening..."

"Fine!" This time, Hanji turned to march towards Eren, leaves still sticking out of her hair. "Since you're being such a spineless shrimp, I'LL take the cutie to the festival-"

_SMACK!_ The rest of Hanji's journey was cut short as a boot collided painfully with her buttocks, causing the poor woman to slump to the ground.

"..."

"..."

_Levi? Why did you kick Dr. Hanji like that?_

"..." Levi stared at Hanji's groaning form before shrugging. "My foot slipped."

Eren looked doubtful as he wrote his reply.

_Okay, if Levi says so..._

"Anyway..." The black-haired man kept his back to Eren as he spoke. "At this rate, it looks like you'll be going to that damn festival no matter what, so... I'll... I'll go with you instead of that fucking quack. If the two of you go, you'll probably end up setting the whole festival on fire. Besides, it's not like I have anything better to d-"

He suddenly stopped, feeling a pressure against his face. Levi's eyes slowly flickered to see Eren, rubbing his cheek affectionately against Levi's.

Levi instinctively jerked away to see the brat's face, and immediately regretted it. Because Eren wasn't happy. He was fucking ecstatic.

Eren scribbled furiously, his handwriting crazier than normal.

_LEVI! LEVI! THANK YOU SO MUCH!_

Flip. _I'M SO HAPPY, LEVI, THANK YOU!_

Flip. _LEVI IS THE BEST!_ With that, Eren leapt up into the air, having gained the full use of his legs.

"Yeah, yeah, stop grinning like that, brat, you'll strain your muscles..." Levi muttered, searching his pockets for a handkerchief to wipe his cheek with. "Might as well get this festival shit over as fast as possible."

"Nooooooooo!" A battered hand waved desperately before Levi and Eren could take a step. Nursing her wounds, Hanji dragged herself up dramatically, her eyes still glinting. "Levi! Eren can't go like that! In _those_ clothes!?"

Levi frowned. "There is nothing wrong with what Eren is wearing. They are _clothes_ and they are _decent_. That's all that matters."

But Hanji continued to argue and whine while Eren simply stood and grinned, and Levi eventually became so fed up with everything that he cracked and gave in, as long as Hanji stuck to what was "decent" by Levi's standards.

To Levi's extreme relief, Hanji pulled out a brunet that was dressed in a _male_ yukata (He wasn't sure what he would have done if Eren had showed up in one of those girly kimono things- NOT THAT HE WANTED TO SEE EREN CROSS-DRESSING OR ANYTHING LIKE THAT).

In fact, Levi was so relieved that at first, he didn't notice it. It was only when they were in the car did the hair ornament in Eren's hair catch Levi's eye. At first, he gritted his teeth and reached to pull it out. He should have known Hanji would not have been able to resist adding something like that...

But as soon as his hand touched it, Levi realized that the decoration on the kanzashi was a bright bluish green color, strangely similar to a certain color of eyes...

Eren tilted his head, not understanding why Levi had his hand extended towards him. Levi blinked before gently brushing the brown locks and turning forward. "You just had something in your hair."

The brunet was still puzzled, he twisted his head to look at Hanji, standing behind the car, who merely gave Eren a thumbs up and puckered her lips.

Levi saw the whole thing in the review mirror, and had to quell the urge to suddenly reverse the car.

* * *

_Levi, are you okay?_

"No. No, I am not." Levi muttered, shoving his hands in his pockets sullenly. "Thanks to you, I've suddenly remembered exactly _WHY _I hate festival shit like this."

He and Eren were now walking around the festival, the excited boy twisting and craning his head enough to crack his neck. Levi simply pressed his lips in a firm line and marched forward as if he was marching towards a death sentence. He would have been slouching by now if it weren't for his height...

"...so, brat... what do you want to do?" Levi asked reluctantly, trying not to wince as a passerby accidentally bumped his shoulders. Crowds... people... UGH...

Eren seemed to be thinking busily for several seconds before writing.

_I want to eat food!_

"...then let's go home already and eat the crap in my fridge."

Unaffected by Levi's suggestion, Eren continued to write enthusiastically.

_I want to eat those poofy cloudy things!_

Irritated, Levi closed his eyes. "Fine, fine, I'll- hey!" Eren had already grabbed Levi's arm and was practically dragging the short man to the cotton candy stall. Damn. The brat was getting bolder with him.

Now digging in his pocket for some money, Levi glanced up at the person managing the cotton candy stall, to see-

"...Mike?" The man nodded his head in greeting.

Eren turned to Levi curiously. _You know him, Levi?_

"...He's a friend of Erwin and Hanji's." Levi explained briefly as Mike accepted his bills. "Mike, this is Eren."

Fortunately, Mike simply nodded, satisfied with the brief introduction. It didn't stop him, however, from leaning forward and giving Eren a careful sniff, causing the boy to jump back in surprise.

"...smells like the sea."

"Ah, Eren, don't worry. It's just a weird habit of his." Levi assured the brunet, though, he found himself feeling a little bothered as well. Not because he was protective of Eren or anything like that-

Scowling unconsciously, Levi shoved the cotton candy to the delighted boy beside him. "Eren, here's your cotton candy. Happy? Good..." Eren suddenly shoved the cotton candy towards Levi's face. "What- NO, I don't want anything! Stop!"

Mike took another sniff. "...I smell denial."

"Eren, that's the only thing I'm buying you tonight, so eat it properly, okay!?"

In the end, however, Levi ended up buying Eren pretty much every food the festival offered. Another decision he immediately regretted.

His arms crammed with all kinds of food (Levi was holding Eren's notebook), Eren held up a frankfurter, examining it curiously before sliding it in and out of his mouth.

"..." Levi promptly snatched the sausage away from Eren, hastily shoving it in his own mouth.

At Eren's questioning glance, he merely rolled his eyes. "Even with your ridiculous appetite, Yeager, you won't be able to finish it all by yourself! I'm being kind enough to help you, so don't you dare give me a hard time!"

Eren nodded, too captivated with the food to question Levi as he began to now devour the takoyaki at an alarming rate.

"Hey... give me the rest of that. I had to buy it all, I might as well try some, too." Levi's phone suddenly vibrated, signaling he had received a text message.

_From: Hanji_

_INDIRECT KISS FTW!_

"..." Levi simply deleted the message before turning his attention back to Eren, who was now nibbling curiously on some fried noodles. He couldn't help notice that Eren seemed to have a preference for the sea food, given the way he had wolfed down the scallops and the fried squid...

"Tch... Eren, hold still." Levi paused to fish out a napkin from his pocket to wipe at Eren's face. "Jeez, you eat so messily..." He grumbled as Eren winced, closing one eye as Levi rubbed roughly the corner of the brunet's mouth.

_Vrrrb._

_From: Hanji_

_JUST KISS HIM ALREADY, DAMN IT_

"..." Levi suddenly spotted a shooting booth and began to walk towards it. "Eren, let's go there."

Eren, intrigued that Levi actually wanted to participate in something, nodded and hurried after Levi, careful not to drop any of his food in the process.

Levi handed over some money and took the mock rifle, Eren watching on curiously. "...anything you want, brat?"

After a short moment of hesitation, Eren pointed to a miniature stuffed cat among the shelves.

"Mmm? Okay, fine..." Levi raised the rifle expertly, closing one of his eyes. "I'll get that... as soon as I get THIS!" Without warning, however, he suddenly swiveled around, shooting into a nearby tree.

"AAAAGGGGHHHH!" The tree screamed violently, its branches rustling wildly. "LEVI, THAT HURT!"

"C-customer, that's a bit-"

"If you have to stalk us like that, Hanji, at least _try_ not to make it painfully obvious..." Levi muttered, swinging back to the stall and taking another shot, hitting the cat on his first try.

Eren shifted some of his food to one arm so he could applaud the now victorious Levi, who shrugged casually, the cat dangling form his pale fingers. "...really, though, I never thought you'd be one for stuffed animals." Levi remarked as he took some more food from Eren, enabling the boy to take the cat from him.

Eren simply grinned toothily, turning the cat so he could compare its face to Levi's. It was then when Levi realized the cat's expression was rather... grumpy... sort of like... "...that does not resemble me in the slightest."

The brat now clamored for his notebook, which Levi handed over reluctantly.

_Can you teach me how to shoot too, Levi!?_

"..." Images of Eren going crazy with the rifle filling in his head, Levi quickly shook his head. "Later, Eren. We're holding too much stuff anyway."

_Vrrrbbb._

_From: Hanji_

_Come on, Levi, you KNOW you want to go and press yourself behind him and pretend to correct his position and whisper hotly in his ear~~~_

"..."

Flip. Levi,_ why do you look so angry?_

"...no reason. Just finish eating all that crap so we can go home already."

* * *

Miraculously, Eren did manage to eat all of his food, but he still wanted to look around more, and Levi, feeling that Hanji would never let him hear the end of it if he did otherwise, decided to let the damn brat have his way.

Eren seemed fascinated with the chicks, gently touching their furry heads as they peeped and shuffled about. He looked up at Levi with huge eyes, but Levi turned his head firmly away. "We are definitely not taking anything ALIVE home! That damn mutt Bean is more than enough..."

They were still walking when they heard the loud sound of splashing at the goldfish stand and the sound of swearing. "Goddamn it..." A blond teenager cursed as a bunch of goldfish flopped around on the wet ground, having spilled from their container. "These fish are so stupid! Why the hell do we have so much of them anyway?"

Levi spared them an uninterested glance before continuing to walk, but then paused, realizing that Eren wasn't moving. "Eren?"

"Jean, calm down..." A tall boy said nervously as he bent down, scooping the fish back into the water. "Oh, there's some in the grass. Can you go get them?"

"Gah, who cares already!" Jean growled. "They're just fish! It's fine if only one or two of them die- AGH!?" A hand suddenly grabbed the back of Jean's head and forced his face into the goldfish pool.

_SPLASH!_

"BLRRRGGGHHH!"

There was a moment of shocked silence until Jean ripped his head up, panting heavily as water dripped from his furious features. "What the HELL-" He found himself faced by an equally, if not more, enraged Eren, who was already holding up his notebook.

_That didn't feel good, did it?_

Flip. _That's how the fishes were feeling as well!_

Flip. _It was your fault, so don't try to blame them!_

"The fuck..." Jean sputtered indignantly. "It's just a _fish_! What the hell are you getting so mad about- OOF!" He was roughly shoved to the side by the tall boy. "The hell, Bertholdt!?"

"Sorry about that! Jean has always been a big jerk!" Bertholdt said cheerfully, smiling at Eren. "I'm so happy that someone had the guts to put him in his place!" Eren blinked, looking unsure of what to do.

Behind them, several more teenagers were approaching. "Bertholdt? What's going on?"

"Oh, hey guys! Jean here was bothering a customer!"

Jean's jaw dropped. "EH?"

"What!?" A boy with a buzz cut exclaimed, glaring at Jean disapprovingly before shaking his head. "Jean, shame on you!"

"Lashing out on a customer like that..." A girl with a ponytail added, speaking around a mouthful of the shave ice she was currently eating.

"It's not nice to do things like that, Jean..."

"Wh- I'm the victim here!" Jean was ignored as the teenagers crowded around Eren, who seemed a little lost at the attention.

"Dude, I'm sorry!"

"Jean's always got a bad temper!"

"Haven't seen you around before! You come from another town?"

"Let's hang out and eat together!"

Before Eren could react, Levi, who had been quietly observing everything, stepped in, placing an arm around Eren's shoulders. "Hey, hey, not all at one time. He's new, so give him some space."

"Mr. Levi! Good evening!"

"You know him, Mr. Levi?"

"You actually exist, Mr. Levi!?"

Sighing, Levi turned to Eren. "Eren, go over to that bench under the streetlight and wait for me there. I need to get rid of these annoying brats." Eren slowly nodded and left, his usually bright green eyes clearly in a state of turmoil.

* * *

A few minutes later, Levi approached isolated area to see Eren sitting on a nearby stone wall instead the bench, looking to the direction of the ocean.

The black-haired man tilted his head as he stared at the brunet perched on the wall, not sure of what to say. Levi was a fairly observant man. As he watched Eren push Jean into the water, Levi had saw, much to his shock, an expression of uncharacteristic rage on Eren's face... It was almost as if...

Levi mulled over the questions he could ask Eren. Are you sulking, brat? Pushing him into the water wasn't all you wanted to do, was it? What was that intent in your face? Why did you get so angry? What _happened_ to you? He soon realized there was only one question he really cared about.

"Eren... are you all right?"

The green eyes flickered to him before Eren began writing again, his words easily visible in the bright street light.

_I'm fine.__ I'm just __upset, that's all._

"...Eren, I don't know what you've experienced in the past, but you might as well get used to things happening like that..." Levi began slowly. "Life is pretty shitty, you know. Humans are even worst."

Eren didn't make a move to write anything.

"...what that Jean boy did wasn't actually that bad, considering the things some people do... You know, Eren, good people, like you and Hanji and Erwin, are pretty rare. Most humans really don't give a damn about most things, like me."

_Thank you for reminding me._

Levi scowled at the hidden tone of sarcasm, walking closer to Eren. "Eren. I'm not a very pretty person. I don't go out of my way to help people. I don't get angry when I see those kinds of things. That's why you shouldn't be by me-"

_Levi isn't a bad person!_ The notebook was shoved forward so violently, it almost hit Levi's face.

Flip. _I understand!_

Flip. _There's a lot of things wrong with humans!_

Flip. _It can't be helped!_

Flip. _That's just the way they are!_

Flip. _I just forgot because I was with Levi!_

Eren paused in his frenzied writing, looking hesitantly at Levi.

_If Levi was a bad person, he would not have helped me!_

"...that was more out of duty..." Levi said dismissively. "It's not like I did that out of the good of my heart or anything. Hell, I don't even think I have one."

_But you still helped me. I know some humans would not._

Levi opened his mouth to disprove Eren, but stopped. "...all right, fine. Maybe I'm not a _complete_ asshole..." He tossed to Eren a wobbling package he had been holding at his side. "...but only when it comes to you, shitty brat."

Caught off guard, Eren held the package up to the light, his eyebrows shooting up as he saw the same goldfish Jean had left to die earlier, now swimming contently in their small bag of water.

Levi wouldn't meet his eyes, seeming very interested in the sky. "You're going to have to take care of them. You'll have to clean their bowl and feed them on your own time. I'm not going to help you. And don't even think of coming to me to cry if they end up dying-" The rest of his rant was cut off by another pressure to Levi's cheek, but this time, it wasn't Eren's cheek, it was his lips.

"...Eren?" The brunet had already pulled back, scooting so Levi couldn't see his face clearly. Only his notebook jutted out awkwardly in the light.

_Dr. Hanji said it was the best way to tell Levi thank you._

"..." For some reason, Levi couldn't bring himself to curse at Hanji again. Instead, he focused on Eren. "Hmm? Then why aren't you jumping around like you did before, brat?"

Eren ignored his question, twisting open the goldfish bag and touching the water with his finger. "...oi, what are you doing?"

_The gold one's a girl, and the black one's a boy._

"...how the hell can you tell?"

_I'm naming them Car and Grishy. _

"...interesting names..." Levi remarked as Eren suddenly jumped up, his face bright and cheerful once more. Levi could have sworn Eren's cheeks seemed a bit too pink, but that might have just been the lighting.

_This wall is neat, Levi!_

"Hn..."

_I want to walk on it!_

"Fine. Just don't go falling down, I'm not going to catch you..." Levi warned, following Eren as the boy walked above him. It was now quite dark, but all the street lights were on, so Levi would still be able to make out anything Eren might want to write.

"You don't want to see anything else, Eren?"

_Didn't we see the whole festival, already?_

"True..." The two paused as a firework suddenly erupted into the sky. Eren only smiled appreciatively, causing Levi to quirk an eyebrow. "You've seen fireworks before, brat?"

Eren nodded, his eyes fixed on the incoming fireworks. Levi turned to watch them as well, a comfortable silence between them, until-

_Vrrrrrb._

_From: Hanji_

_HAVE YOU ATTACKED EREN YET!?_

"..." Levi quickly erased it, the loud beeping of the phone catching Eren's attention.

"...what? You know what a phone is, I already explained to you the other day..."

_Levi, I saw Dr. Hanji's name! __What are you talking about? I want to know!_

Cursing Eren's curiosity, Levi pointed to the sky, hoping to distract the brat. "Focus on the fireworks! They're going to be gone soon!"

_Vrrrrb_.

_From: Hanji_

_Ooh! Since you're not responding, I'm guessing you're already ripping Eren's yukata open, aren't you!?_

Levi's eye twitched as Eren tried to peer over his shoulder. "...NO, Eren, you cannot see."

Pouting, Eren bent down, still attempting to look at Levi's phone, his hand closing on Levi's arm.

"H-hey, stop that-" Oh hell no. He wasn't going to let Eren see any of this...

_Vrrrrb._

_From: Hanji_

_RAVISH EREN TILL HE CAN'T WALK!_

Soon, there would be a new corpse in town. And it wasn't going to be Levi.

He finally managed to tear his arm from Eren and shut his phone off. The sudden movement, however, caused Eren to lose his balance, making the boy slip off the wall-

"Shit," Levi swore as Eren flailed in panic. "Eren, come-Oof!" The brunet fell solidly into Levi's arms, the black-haired man catching him bridal style. "Jeez, you..." Levi muttered as an astonished Eren gripped his shoulders awkwardly, one of his hands still clenching the goldfish bag.

"..."

"You eat half of the festival, yet you're still so scrawny and easy to carry..." Levi commented as he gazed into Eren's eyes. The boy frowned at the remark.

Taking advantage of Levi's occupied arms, Eren reached out and pulled at Levi's pale cheeks playfully in revenge. "..." Levi's eyes narrowed a bit as he felt the twin pinches on his face. "Don't make me drop you..." He mumbled as Eren tried to force his mouth into a smile.

Eren only shook in silent giggles.

The wind suddenly picked up, Eren's kanzashi stirred slightly, and a stray leaf landed in Levi's hair. Before he could say anything, Eren picked it out, his tan hand absentmindedly stroking the dark locks back in place.

"...Eren..." Levi found himself saying, and when Eren looked at him, he merely shook his head. "No, I just..." He realized Eren's hand hadn't left his hair. He also realized that he didn't mind so much.

Eren's cheeks were becoming red again, and his eyes darted back to the sky, the wall, the lights... anything but Levi. Levi found that he didn't like that too much. "Hey..." He whispered, leaning forward and softly bumping his forehead against Eren's. Slowly, hesitantly, the shy green came back to meet the sharp grey.

Eren's eyes truly were something to look at... Levi found those eyes getting bigger, nearer, and he wasn't sure if it was he who was moving closer, or Eren, or both of them.

He blinked. Eren was still leaning against him, his brown meshing with Levi's black, the tan cheeks blushing, and his eyes, those amazing eyes, fluttered shut.

Levi followed suit, and then he couldn't see Eren, he could only feel the weight of the brunet against his arms and chest, the pressure on his shoulder and cheek, and the hot breath from Eren's mouth as he tilted his head-

_CRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASH!_

Without warning, another tree suddenly fell to the ground, making both Eren and Levi stiffen in surprise. A chorus of pained groans immediately rose from the branches, and out spilled quite a bit of people, including Hanji, her coworkers, Mike, the teenagers from before, and even some of Erwin's subordinates.

"..."

"..ahahaha, sorry about that, Levi..."

Levi just looked at them all, still not letting go of Eren, who seemed shell-shocked now.

"W-we just wanted to see the fireworks better-"

"I-it's not like we meant to spy on you guys or anything-"

"That was still pretty hot though-"

"SHUT UP! IT WAS A COMPLETE ACCIDENT! DON'T MISUNDERSTAND!"

"We just... wait, Levi, say something, will you?"

Levi continued to just look at them, his expression unreadable.

"Aren't you going to get all mad and rage at us now?"

Levi continued to just look at them.

"...Levi, really, why aren't you just looking at us?"

Levi still just looked at them.

"..."

"..."

"...c-come on, Levi, you're freaking us out..."

Levi's silent staring continued.

"..."

"...GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! WE'RE SORRY!" Terrified for their lives, everyone (yes, even Hanji) ran away at top speed, leaving Levi and Eren alone once more.

"...I should do that more often..." Levi muttered to himself, turning back to Eren. "..."

The black-haired man promptly averted his gaze, shifting Eren to get a better grip on him. "We- we better go home already. It's getting late and weirdos are all around."

Flip. _Levi, you can put me down now..._

"...I can." Levi acknowledged briefly, but made no move to release Eren, instead starting to walk back with the boy.

"Gah, Eren, quit looking at me like that! If I put you down, you might end up falling on your feet again, so it can't be helped! Now let's find the damn car and go before Hanji comes to stalk us again..." Levi was suddenly quite thankful for his ability to suppress blushes. He hadn't thought it would come in handy so often.

* * *

**...Don't kill me. Come on, you know that the first kiss attempt never works out XD jk, jk...**

**Sorry, ryoka-chan, Eren didn't end up cross-dressing after all, but he got a cute hair ornament~ ;)**

**Reviews = happy Raikun-sama = craziness = update**


	5. Looks Like the Boy's Too- oh wait

**A/N: Aww, thank you for all the lovely feedback, you guys! =) **

**And yes, now I am properly replying to reviews, which I shall do right for the guest ones now... ^-^**

**animefan: NOOOOOO! -raises insulin needle- YOU MUST LIVE! FOR THE SAKE OF LEVIxEREN GOODNESS! XDDDD jk jk, but thank you, I'm glad you like it! ^.^**

**Miki: Thanks! Well, he might, for a price though... ;)**

* * *

One could remain in denial for only so long.

Levi sat down on the edge of his bed as he briefly contemplated his situation. He briefly concluded that he was in deep shit.

Because no matter how furiously he had denied Hanji's earlier accusations, or how many times he brushed off Erwin's annoyingly perceptive comments, Levi couldn't lie to himself now.

He actually had feelings for the damn brat. Feelings that most definitely crossed the boundary of platonic.

It was troubling for several reasons. First of all, Hanji. Second, HANJI. Third, Eren was a mysterious, confusing boy who came from extremely dubious origins, and Levi still wasn't a hundred percent sure if the boy was a minor or not. Fourth... at the moment, Levi couldn't tell whether Eren felt the same or the boy was just horrified with himself.

Ever since they had nearly kissed the other night, Eren seemed to have made it his mission to avoid Levi at all costs. He had remained uncomfortably silent the entire car ride back (well, Eren always did remain silent, but), never wrote anything to Levi unless it was absolutely necessary, and, when they retired, slept so far away from Levi that the poor kid was literally half-off the bed.

Not that Levi actually wanted Eren close to him when they slept together.

...Okay, maybe he did. A little. But that was not the issue here.

The issue was that Eren's behavior had continued today. He practically ran away from Levi every time he attempted to say something, and spent the whole morning cooped up in the bathroom, much to the black-haired man's irritation.

It was now late in the afternoon, and Levi had had enough of the kid's ridiculous actions. Spotting Eren in the living room, he walked over to confront the brunet.

Unaware of Levi's presence, Eren was feeding his new goldfish the fish food Levi had been forced to buy (all alone, he may add) earlier that day. Levi observed Eren, the way his eyes stood out against his brown hair and tan skin, the shape of his slender form still visible underneath Levi's shirt, the way his b- maybe it was time Levi should speak up.

"Eren." His tone was rather soft as he said the boy's name, but Eren still jerked violently in surprise, nearly dropping the fish-food container into the pets' makeshift tank.

He hastily whirled around to face Levi, obviously panicking, and Levi, sensing that Eren was about to try and flee again, quickly brought his hands down on either side of the brunet, effectively trapping him against the table in a matter of seconds.

"Will you stop being such a fucking pussy?" Levi growled, locking his eyes with the frightened green irises. "Do you honestly want to pretend that the last night didn't happen?"

Eren, who had been struggling against Levi's arms, froze, obviously not expecting such a question. The brunet immediately went bright red in a matter of seconds, his hands fiddling nervously.

"..."

"...well, do you?"

After what Levi felt like was an eternity and a half, Eren, nearly shaking in shame, buried his face in his hands, his head slowly shaking as he did so.

"I see." As soon as he received Eren's answer, Levi felt a warm feeling wash over him. As he reached over to gently pry Eren's hands away from his flaming face, Levi realized it was relief. "I don't want to, either." He confessed frankly, causing Eren's face to get even redder.

Even Levi himself was surprised at forwardness of his words, quickly, he turned his head aside. "...I'm sorry." His hands slowly let go of Eren's to hang by his side. "I didn't mean... ah... ARGH..." Levi groaned. "Damn it! I've never been in this kind of situation before!"

Still blushing, Eren reached over for his notebook, writing shakily.

_You think I have!?_

Flip. _Why else would I run away from Levi!?_

"But..." Levi struggled for the words he should say, wanting and not wanting to look at Eren. "Eren... you do feel like you want to do... stuff... like we did last night...do you?"

In front of him, Eren nearly bursted from embarrassment, red to even the tips of his ears.

_THIS IS WHAT I CAN'T HANDLE!_

"...huh?" Levi blinked. "What? What do you mean?"

Flip. _Levi is always so calm!_

"Eh!?"

Flip. _Levi's face doesn't change! Not last night or today!__  
_

Flip. _I'm the only one who gets all weird and I have all these strange feelings and my face always is so hot and it's weird it's weird, it's WEIRD-_

_RIPPPP!_

"Eren, calm down!" Levi grabbed the boy's hand as the ferocious force of Eren's writing caused the paper to tear. "Eren... what do you mean, my face doesn't change?" Surely, the boy had seen Levi get all... ...well...

_I mean that Levi only looks grumpy or angry all the time!_

"...oh." Sometimes, it slipped Levi's mind that he had somewhat of a poker face. Or constipated face, as Hanji liked to call it. But even so... "Can't you tell how fucking stupid I'm feeling right now!?"

_Levi just looks grumpy! And maybe a little scary!_

"..." Levi shrugged his shoulders helplessly. "...Eren, I can't help it, that's the way my face just is."

The boy glared, obviously unimpressed by Levi's response.

_Then change it!_

"...Tch." Levi gave another sigh and grudgingly sat down on the couch, motioning Eren to follow him. He couldn't believe he was actually going to have to do this. "Eren... come here."

Eren hesitated before timidly stepping forward in front of Levi, his fingers twisting awkwardly. Levi promptly snatched him by the waist and pulled him into his lap.

"!?" The boy's eyes nearly doubled in size at the close proximity of their faces, clutching his notebook as if his life depended on it. Gritting his teeth in resigned determination, Levi leaned his face closer to Eren, who was once more blushing like mad.

"..."

"...how about now?" Levi managed to mumble out, feeling like an utter fool. "Do I still look the same now?"

"..." Eren hastily averted his gaze to scribble in his notebook.

_You look... a little different?_

"...see, I told y-"

Flip. _ I still can't really tell..._

"..."

Flip. _Because Levi still looks calmer than me!_

"Shitty brat!" Levi hissed in frustration, reaching up to grab Eren's head, curling his fingers around brown strands. Not knowing what to expect, Eren gave him a frightened look, but Levi simply shoved the boy's face against his chest.

Neither of them spoke (or wrote) anything for a few seconds until Levi began to talk again. "...Eren, can you feel that? It's my heartbeat." He felt the boy stiffen, then nod against his skin. "...You can tell that it's really fast, isn't it?"

More nods.

"...It's probably as fast as yours right now." Levi muttered reluctantly, absentmindedly stroking Eren's hair. "So... even though my face is like this, you're not the only one who thinks they're acting weird. Okay?"

Eren hesitantly rose from Levi's chest to glance at the man's face again. Then, he suddenly smiled brightly and nodded, taking Levi's hand from his hair and wrapping their fingers together.

"..." Damn. The kid was really cute.

Eren blinked before beginning to write in his notebook again.

_Levi? Just now, your eyes got more scary-looking..._

"Ah? ...No, it's nothing." Increasingly aware of their position, Levi cleared his throat. "Eren, I... if we're going to be... ...together..." Oh lord, he was talking like a fucking twelve year old. "...I have... some... conditions. I want to know several things."

_Okay?_

"Right. First of all..." Levi scrutinized Eren's face carefully. "Are you sure there's no one out there that can claim you? As their guardian or family?"

Eren stared back at him seriously before beginning to write.

_I don't belong to anyone! _

"...and are you _sure_ you're more than eighteen years old?" Levi knew that they would get nowhere if it was about Eren's "real" age, but he had to know that the kid was at least legal.

Eren's answer is immediate.

_I AM!_

"...fine." Levi closed his eyes, resting his head against Eren's. "That's all I really needed to know, I guess." He murmured, clutching Eren closer and feeling the brunet squirm in embarrassment against him.

He opened one eye as Eren suddenly broke free and raised his head, looking triumphant despite his blushing cheeks.

_Levi, I want condishions too!_

"...that's not how you spell the word, brat."

Eren ignored him and continued writing, a wide grin on his face as he showed the notebook to Levi.

_First, I want to eat cotton candy again! Every day!_

"...I'll buy it when the festival comes around again."

Flip. _I__ want to keep taking care of Car and Grishy!_

"Why else would I get them for you, brat..."

Flip. _I want to drive again! ALL THE TIME!_

"...once you've taken and passed driving school, sure."

Flip. _I want to learn how to write and read better!_

"Tch, you'll be doing that whether you'd want to or not."

Flip. _I want to be able to wear the maid dress sometimes!_

"...we can discuss that later. Is that all?"

Eren shook his head.

_Last one. Levi has to promise, no matter, what..._

Levi inwardly groaned. Oh dear, now he was going to have to make some cheesy promise about never having to leave the damn brat...

Flip. _To never let me fall into the ocean._

"...huh?"

Eren simply smiled, this smile seeming almost... sad.

_Please._

Flip. _Because if I fall into the ocean,_

Flip. _I can't be with Levi._

His eyes suddenly seeming distant, Eren didn't look like he wanted to explain anything more, and Levi wasn't about to push him.

"...all right." Levi ruffled Eren's hair lightly. "I don't really get it, but if that's what you want, brat, then it's fine. I'll protect you."

Eren gazed back at him with slightly wide eyes before smiling widely again. All traces of sadness gone, Eren's face was simply pure joy, his mouth opening in a silent laugh.

_Thank you, Levi!_

Flip. _As I thought, no matter what, Levi is always the best!_

...that was... strange... what was this weird feeling in Levi's chest- OH FUCK NO HE SO DID NOT JUST HAVE A SHITTY "DOKIDOKI" MOMENT FUCK FUCK FUCK THIS SORT OF CRAP SHOULDN'T HAPPEN TO HIM-

"Brat, let's kiss!" The rash words falling out of Levi's mouth nearly gave poor Eren a heart attack.

_WHAT WHAT AHWAT WHAT WHATHAWHAT LEVI!?_

"Do you not want to?" Levi demanded almost haggardly as Eren covered his face with one of his hands as the other wrote.

_I don't not want to, but Levi looks scary again!_

"What!? You didn't have a problem with that last night!"

Eren peeked out shyly from the spaces between his fingers. Levi promptly grabbed his hand and tore it from his face. He was pretty sure that his own face didn't become any gentler, but the look in Eren's eyes slowly turned into something that suspiciously resembled anticipation-

_Vrrrrb. Vrrrrb. _

"Ah." Levi's phone was ringing. Since it was in his reach, Eren leaned over to get it for him.

Levi glanced at the caller id, saw that it was Erwin, and answered, still not letting go of Eren's waist. "Erwin?"

"Levi... I hope I'm not interrupting you with something..." Erwin's voice sounded like it always did, but Levi could have sworn there was as trace of humor in his tone.

"It's fine." Levi replied stiffly, his eye twitching in irritation. "What is it?"

The trace of humor immediately disappeared. "It's about Eren, Levi... I'm sorry to ask you this, could you come over to my place? I have something to talk to you about. In person."

Levi raised an eyebrow as Eren watched him, puzzled. Something about the brat that couldn't be talked about over the phone? He instinctively tightened his grip on the boy's waist. "...sure. When? Now?"

"That would be good."

"Okay, I'll see you then." Levi closed his phone, slipping it into his pocket. "Eren, I have to go out for a while to see Erwin." He explained, his hand leaving Eren's waist to stroke his hair again. "I won't be gone for long, so stay here with Bean and be good, okay?"

Eren nodded obediently. Levi patted his head one more time before quickly setting off, wondering if he had just gained a potential lover or another pet.

* * *

The familiar drive to Erwin's home didn't take Levi long. Soon, he was already inside the police chief's house, seated at a table across Erwin.

"So? What did you want to talk about?" He questioned, noticing in trepidation that Erwin looked rather... shaken, as if he had received a huge shock earlier. "Erwin?"

"After the day at the hospital, I decided to try do some more researching. Want a drink?" Erwin offered, already pouring himself a glass.

Levi simply watched him warily.

Erwin took a small sip from his glass before continuing. "Well, Levi, I stand corrected. It turns out that there was a Yeager, after all."

Levi stared at him, unable to fully register the words. There was a person named Yeager. There was a person that could be Eren's family. There was a person that Eren could return to. It was news Levi had been practically praying for a few days earlier, so why-

Erwin could not help smiling wearily at the look on the writer's face. "Don't worry, Levi. He shares the same surname with Eren, all right, but he's been dead for well over a hundred years."

"..."

"...haah?" Levi choked out in disbelief. "He's dead!?"

"Yes." Erwin confirmed. "The last of his family, actually. He didn't leave any children or any close relatives behind."

"...oh?" Was all Levi could say, not knowing how he exactly felt at the moment. Sad? Happy? Relieved? Slightly shamed? "So... you've called me over just to confirm that you can't find any living relatives of Eren?"

Erwin shook his head lightly. "No, I have not. I wanted to talk about this man who died over a hundred years ago. I read his story and... well, I think you need to hear it, Levi."

Levi leaned back in his chair, his blank face concealing the feeling of uneasiness in his stomach. "Go ahead, then."

His friend took a deep breath. "His name was Grisha Yeager. He was a German doctor and lived in a village near the ocean. He appeared to have had an ordinary life... except for one incident."

"Which is...?"

"Which is... when, only a month or two after starting his practice, he found... an abandoned girl by the beachside." Levi unconsciously gripped the glass Erwin had poured for him.

"Upon finding her, he realized she was unable to speak or walk properly. After helping the girl, he tried to find her relatives or family, but no one recognized her. The girl communicated to him by writing. She told the doctor that her name was Carla, and that she was an orphan with no family. She was a young, pretty, and kind woman, and many of the villagers would have taken her in, but the doctor offered his own home to her. She stayed with him for several years."

Erwin gave Levi a meaningful look before continuing.

"Carla was eventually able to walk, but she never gained back her voice. She and the doctor grew very close. They were actually engaged to be married, even."

"...so they married?"

Erwin shook his head again. "No. Carla disappeared before the ceremony could take place. She and the doctor were riding on a ship to visit his parents when a storm suddenly broke out. Grisha got thrown overboard. He was found almost immediately afterward, washed up safely on a nearby beach. But there was no sign of Carla, not on the ship or in the water. Grisha never saw her again."

There was a short pause between the two men, Erwin finally breaking the silence. "Levi... doesn't this sound familiar? This girl came from the sea... she couldn't talk... she couldn't walk properly... it's almost like... Eren..."

Levi wasn't listening to him, his eyes riveted to the table's surface, not really seeing anything. Disappeared... never to be seen again...

"Levi? Levi?"

It took him several seconds to realize that Erwin had been calling his name. "Levi... Eren said his parents were probably both dead... he said he came from waters that are suspiciously close to where that doctor lived, and they just happened to share the name surname! I read Grisha's stories from his own private journal (don't ask what I went through to get my hands on it), and the dates indicate that Carla disappeared almost a hundred and ninety five years ago, less than a year before Eren claims to have been born! Levi, you don't think that possibly..."

_"I'm going to name them Car and Grishy!"_

Car and Grishy... Carla and Grisha... a rather strange coincidence... almost too strange to be a coincidence...

Levi didn't say anything for several minutes. Then he suddenly downed his glass in a swift gulp. "No. Yes. I don't care. It doesn't matter." He sighed. "Eren is a human. And he won't disappear. He won't." Levi repeated, more to himself than Erwin. "He won't. Eren will talk about his past when he wants to. He'll have all the time he wants because he'll be staying with me."

Erwin studied the black-haired man's face carefully before slowly nodding in agreement. "All right. I won't talk about this to anyone else. You're right... we should focus more on getting Eren to adjust to life here. He doesn't look like he wants to leave anytime soon..." He added, chuckling faintly. "I heard you both enjoyed the festival."

"...shit..." Levi swore, reaching over to pour himself another glass as he realized it was futile to try to deny anything. "I thought these sort of things are supposed to take months, not days. And the kid's such a fucking brat. A fucking adorable brat. Oh shit, did I actually just say that? Don't you dare tell Hanji."

Erwin gave another laugh. "Then you better hurry back to Eren, Levi. Brats can grow up quickly. Or perhaps Eren already has?"

* * *

Levi would have liked to pretend that he wasn't shaken up by Erwin's story. There was no way Eren could disappear like that.

But he drove home at a speed faster than usual, and he found himself practically running as he threw open the door with more force than was necessary. "Eren-" Whatever Levi was going to say, he promptly forgot.

Because Eren was _there_, he was right there in front of Levi's eyes, sitting peacefully with Bean on the floor. At the sound of Levi's voice, the brunet looked up and gave Levi that same damn smile again. He picked up his notebook.

_Welcome home, Levi!_

Flip. _How was your visit with Chief Erwin?_

Eren was simply flipping the pages, Levi realized, the brat had already written his notes earlier. Because he had been waiting for Levi to come home. Like Levi had been expecting to see him when he got home.

"...I'm home." Levi said the words thickly, too thickly, and maybe the alcohol had gotten to his head, because he could only think of Eren, Eren, Eren, Eren, and before either of them knew it, Levi suddenly scooped Eren up, burying his face into the brown locks.

"Eren..." He murmured, and the boy raised his head, peering bemusedly into Levi's eyes as he tentatively touched Levi's cheek. Levi took Eren's hand and brought the fingertips to his lips, much to Eren's shock. He then pressed his lips the back of Eren's hand, his forehead, his cheek.

By now, Eren was blushing like mad, but he still met Levi's eyes, his hands shyly cupping the pale face. Once more captivated by the bluish green, Levi curled his fingers tighter around Eren's shoulders and leaned forward, his breath caressing Eren's reddening cheeks.

They end up moving at the same time; Levi bent down while Eren tilted his head up and their lips met in the middle. It was gentle, chaste, and warm, Eren's mouth was soft under Levi's, and Levi would have continued the kiss longer had they not needed air.

Levi drew back gently before whispering quietly against the boy's mouth. "Since I did that... you won't be able to go back from where you came from, right?"

Seeming a little dazed from the kiss, Eren simply caressed Levi's cheek.

"You said you don't belong to anyone, right?"

Eren nodded, his green eyes clear and honest and _lovely_, Levi thought. "Then... belong to me. Just me. Just stay here."

The brunet watched him carefully, then opened his mouth, and it took Levi a few seconds to realize that Eren was carefully mouthing words to him.

_I will not leave Levi._ _But..._ Eren pointed to Levi and then himself before beginning to mouth words again.

_I want Levi to belong to me._

"...Damn brat. Fine then. It's a deal."

This time, Eren snuggled happily against Levi as they lay in bed, the older man occasionally dipping his head to kiss or caress Eren's hair.

Levi was ready to doze off when Eren poked him again. "Mmm?"

_Levi_, he mouthed, _I want to know more about you_.

"...like what?"

_Anything._

Levi ran his fingers through Eren's hair. "You already know a lot. My name is Levi. I have a minor height complex and can be a little... anal when it comes to cleanliness. I have a short temper and a blank face. I used to write books, but I'm on a break. I have two friends, Hanji Zoe and Erwin Smith."

_How old are you?_

"...I'm a little over thirty years old."

Eren's mouth opened in slight shock. _Young!_ He mouthed. _Levi is young!_

"...shut up."

"...yes?"

_Where are your parents?_

Levi frowned again. "What is this, twenty questions?" Eren shrugged.

_You were all asking me questions. I'm not sure if there was 20, though._

"Eren, that's different."

"..."

The brunet still looked put out, so Levi relented. "It's like you, damn brat. They're no longer around."

_What happened to them?_

"They got into a car accident." Levi said bluntly, tracing his fingers against Eren's cheek. "Five years after I finished school. It was a long time ago."

Eren's mouth opened slightly as the brunet nodded his head in understanding. Levi half-expected Eren to mouth an apology or become uncomfortable, but the brunet did neither.

_Were you angry, Levi? _

Levi let out a small sound of distaste. "What the hell was there to be angry for, brat? It was no one's fault. Shit happens. That was all to it."

Eren opened his mouth again, but hesitated slightly, as if he wasn't sure if he should say what he wanted to say. Levi watched him attentively.

_I envy you, Levi._

The brat's eyes seemed sad and distant again.

They stayed quiet for some time until Eren broke the silence in his own way.

_Levi, were your parents grumpy people too?_

"...no." Levi said honestly. "They were pretty happy people, actually."

Eren raised an eyebrow, puzzled.

"Yeah, no one else could understand it either. My dad used to lamely joke about how I somehow got the grumpy genes of the family." Levi paused. "...maybe that's why I turned out to be so grumpy. I heard too much of his lame jokes when I was young so my face turned out like this."

He hadn't meant to be funny when he said it, but Eren still opened his mouth in a noiseless laugh, his eyes once more joyful.

"...you really can't make any noise at all, can you?"

_Does that bother you?_ Propping his chin against Levi's chest, Eren looked neither worried or offended, merely curious.

"No. In fact, I think you being able to talk would bother me." Eren's face scrunched up, displeased. It was actually becoming a very familiar expression to Levi.

_I'll have you know that my voice was very nice! _Eren forgot to mouth the words slowly in his indignation, Levi barely managed to understand him.

"Oh, I believe it. I already can see you singing opera dramatically." Levi was pretty sure Eren had no idea what the word "opera" meant, but from the scowl on the brunet's face, Eren could tell that Levi was insulting him again.

_Singing is boring, anyway!_

Eren rolled his eyes and blew a puff of air out of the corner of his mouth, clearly intending to empathize his message.

Levi simply gave him a quick kiss, pulling back to see Eren's flustered face and smiling, truly smiling, for the first time in years.

* * *

**Sorry, I know this chapter's shorter than most, but I felt like this was a good note to end it. ^^" Kinda rushed along their development... oh... oh well... ^-^"**

**Reviews make me dance to Shingeki no Kyojin's first opening~ XD**


	6. What Would I Give

**A/N: Okay, this is a super short chapter because I ran out of time. ^-^" Soon, my updates will get less frequent, so I wanted to get at least something for you guys before I temporarily disappear. X(**

**And now everyone's afraid or suspicious that this story will end in tragedy... Guys, just read my profile. I don't want to say anything here in case I spoil the story for anyone, but if you're seriously that worried, just read it. ^O^"**

**EDIT: OH WOW UPLOADED WRONG DOCUMENT XD SORRY EVERYONE**

* * *

Levi woke to see Eren staring at him.

"..."

The brunet in front of him immediately blushed and fidgeted slightly. Prior to Levi's awakening, Eren had apparently been stroking his hair as he slept, gazing at his sleeping face, not expecting Levi to suddenly wake up.

Levi simply looked at Eren, blinked, then closed his eyes again. "Eren... what time is it?" The boy traced several numbers on Levi's collarbone.

_1...0...2...4..._

"Ten twenty-four? I see..." The older man murmured, reaching to pull Eren closer, his arms slung around his waist. He shifted his head forward to kiss Eren's forehead.

Tentatively, Eren pressed a soft kiss to Levi's cheek in response, his ears still red from Levi's kiss.

Levi, slightly amused, brought his hand up to cup Eren's face. "Oh, was that another thank you? Did you just want to kiss my cheek?"

Eren smiled, his hand holding up two fingers to indicate his answer.

"Hn..."

_Levi_, Eren began to mouth, _we should get up_. _  
_

"...let's not." Levi muttered, wishing Eren was flush against him as they were last night. "Stay here with me, okay?"

Eren nodded happily, pressing his face into the junction between Levi's neck and shoulder. Levi instantly wrapped his arms around Eren, pressing his lips to Eren's hair again.

He had never felt so comfortable for a long time.

Right now, it didn't matter that all the things Eren and Hanji were saying before might be true, it didn't matter that he had probably fallen for a former mermaid six times his age, the only thing that mattered was Eren clinging to him docilely, and everything was perfect-

"Do I sense development or DO I SENSE DEVELOPMENT!?"

"..."

"..."

"...Eren." Levi said slowly, his calm expression contrasting strongly with Eren's shocked one, "I want you to leave here now and wait for me in the kitchen. I'm going to kill Hanji and I'd rather you not be here to see it."

_LEVI!_ Eren mouthed in consternation, his eyes darting back and forth between Hanji and Levi as he instinctively drew the covers over his body (although he was clothed).

"OHOHOHOHOHOHO oheeheeheeheeohohohohohoho!" The doctor was practically dancing on the spot in maniacal joy. "I KNEW this was going to happen, I KNEW IT! I KNEW IT I KNEW IT I KNEW IT I KNEW IT KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"

"...are you done now?"

"NO, NOOOOOOOO! THIS IS JUST TOO PRICELESS! EHEEHEEHEEHEE AHAHAHAHAHA MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA OH MY LORD, I THINK I'VE GONE CRAZY! IT'S JUST SO DAMN CUTE! STAY STILL I NEED TO TAKE A PICTURE-"

A nearby desk promptly flew into her head.

_CRASH!_

"Not today!" Levi yelled, standing at the foot of the bed in his sleeping clothes while Eren panicked on the bed, still gripping the sheets.

"DID YOU GUYS END UP DOING IT!? **DID YOU**!? AAHAHAHAHAHAHA LEVI I'M GOING TO KILL YOU, YOU SHRIMP-"

"HANJI."

"OH NO NO NO NO NO NO, YOU'RE NOT GOING TO BE GETTING RID OF ME THAT EASILY-"

"HANJI."

Eren had somehow managed to find his notebook in the middle of the chaos.

_Dr. Hanji, I'm sorry, but could you wait for us to get up first!?_

"..." Hanji pouted, pausing in her fangirl dance. "Dang it, Eren, why do you have to be so cute and ask me like that... ah... fine... fine... I'll just leave you two lovey dovey birds alone... ahhh... I feel so old now... like my children got married or something..."

Without warning, the doctor suddenly burst into tears, and, crying and laughing hysterically, ran from the room at top speed.

"..."

"..."

"I'm still going to kill her."

Flip. _Please don't, Levi!_

"Don't worry, Eren, Hanji's a doctor, she'll be fine even if she's killed." Levi said carelessly, walking back to the bed to the brunet.

Thoroughly unconvinced, Eren was about to scribble a reply when Levi sat down and suddenly pulled the boy into his lap again. "Hah..." He rested his chin on Eren's shoulder, an almost defeated look in his face. "I'm the kind of person who hates human contact and would scoff at the mere mention of cuddling... and yet now I'm wanting to do this kind of corny crap..."

Smiling again, Eren hastily wrote a few words before raising the notebook to Levi's eyes.

_Really, Levi!? I feel very special then!_

"You better feel special, damn brat." Levi glanced again at Eren's beaming face, and, deciding the boy didn't look flustered enough, blew softly into his ear.

"...!" Eren's entire face instantly crimsoned as Levi placed a kiss on his lower jaw. "Hmm... I think you look nicer all bothered and blushing, Eren." It was a lie, of course. The damn brat looked fucking adorable no matter what he was doing. But Levi would carry that to the grave.

Poor Eren looked like he wanted to hide his face again.

_Levi! Levi is being_ stupid!

"..."

Flip. _Levi, don't we have to get up soon?_

"...five more minutes..."

* * *

Much to Levi's annoyance, however, they came into the kitchen room to see both Hanji and Erwin. Hanji was still wiggling her eyebrows and winking enough to make Levi puke, while Erwin stood there with an apologetic look on his face, the police chief obviously torn between guilt and amusement.

"So." Hanji gave another wiggle of her eyebrows. "So. So... you have anything important to tell us, Levi~~?"

"..."

"I'm taking Eren out to town today." Levi announced loudly before beginning to make himself some coffee, Eren trailing after him like a duckling.

"Seriously!? You're taking Eren out on another date!? AAAAAAAAAH!"

Levi cursed quietly, surprised that Hanji's last squeal hadn't cracked any of his glasses. To make things worst, Bean, having woken up by the racket, saw Hanji and loped around excitedly, barking at the top of his voice. Erwin hastened to calm him.

"It is NOT a date, it is an errand!" Levi corrected sharply, thinking his head might split open from all the noise.

Eren cocked his head curiously.

_What's a date? Is it fun?_

"...TOO MOE!" Hanji exploded, pretending (or maybe not) to swoon on the spot while Levi calmly stepped over her body to get his cereal.

It was up to Erwin to answer the question. "...well, a date, Eren, is when two people who like each other do fun activities with each other, such as eating dinner, or seeing a movie (do you know what a movie is?) and what not. And they talk and get to know one another better. Most people go on dates before marrying each other."

_Oh! I understand!_

Flip. _So when Levi and I went to the festival, it was a date?__  
_

"Yes, yes, that's right, Eren." Erwin said absentmindedly.

"..."

"...a-ah, wait-"

"It was NOT." Levi growled through gritted teeth before sipping his cup of coffee. Eren, seemingly unperturbed by the older man's intimidating behavior, began to write.

_Why not, Levi?_

"Just because. It wasn't."

Flip. _But we went somewhere fun!_

"No, I did not have fun. Not one bit"

Flip. _And we talked and got to know each other better!_

"...what the hell, Eren, we did not do that!"

Flip. _And we like each other!_

"..." Levi promptly brought his coffee to his mouth in order to buy himself some time to answer, uncomfortably aware of the three attentive pairs of eyes fixed on him (Bean was busy eating his own breakfast).

Finishing his coffee, Levi set the cup down and casually pushed a bowl of cereal towards Eren. "...only one out of three, Yeager, you lose. Now eat your damn cereal and stop grinning like that, you'll end up looking like Hanji if you do that too often."

_Yes!_ Eren looked like he would have sung in joy if he had a voice.

"OH COME ON LEVI STOP BEING SUCH A STICKMAN! WE ALL KNOW YOU WANT TO KISS AND MOLEST HIM LIKE THE DAMN PERVERT YOU SECRETLY ARE~~!"

Levi ignored Hanji. "Ah yeah, going back to what I was talking about in the first place..." He turned towards Eren, who was busily digging into his cereal. "Eren, I was thinking we should go out to buy you some clothes."

The brunet paused in his eating, raising his head up to Levi with a quizzical look.

_But Levi, I have clothes!_

"...yeah, but they're mine. You're not going to wear them forever, are you?"

"E-EH?" Hanji ran to the table, her head swiveling back and forth between Eren and Levi. "Wh-what do you mean by that, 'forever'!? Explain yourself, Levi!"

"...It means he's staying with me." Levi spat out bluntly despite himself, a very scary shadow hanging over his face. "The damn brat came out of fucking nowhere, so I don't have a choice if I want to keep my sanity."

"Wh-what? WHAT? WHAAAAAAAAAAAAT!? H-HOW DID THINGS ESCALATE SO QUICKLY!?" Hanji screamed, dashing to Eren and putting her arms protectively around him. "Y-you intend to marry Eren? Mother will never allow it!"

"...Hanji, calm down a bit-" Erwin attempted, but Levi cut him off irritably.

"Who the hell is this 'Mother' you speak of? I only see a crazy being who clearly belongs in the jungle. Now hurry up and get your hands off of him!"

Hanji only clutched Eren tighter. "OOH! Possessive Levi! It gives me the shivers! Can't I molest Eren just a little bit too!?"

"I'll cut you into mincemeat before you can even try!" Levi threatened, grabbing a knife from one of his drawers.

"Erm, Levi-"

Eren began to write something in his notebook, his face happy and ignorant of the ruckus around him.

_I really like wearing Levi's clothes._

Flip. _Can't I wear them a little longer?_

"...Don't be stupid, brat." Levi grumbled, reaching out to tousle Eren's hair. "At this rate, there won't be enough clothes for the both of us. Now, Erwin, do me a favor and get Hanji out of my kitchen before she drools all over the floors."

"...sure thing..." Erwin murmured, putting a hand on Hanji's shoulder and gently steering her to the exit, much to her horror.

"WH-WH-WHAT but-but no, no, no NO, I want to see more of my lovey dovey boys in action, Erwin, you CAN'T! Besides, I have to help Levi with shopping-"

"Goodbye..." Levi waved lazily at her, hiding his smirk by drinking his second cup of coffee.

"You will pay for this later, Levi, you little shrimp! YOU WILL PAY-"

_Slam!_

Levi let out a quiet sound of relief as the door shut behind the two. "My god... I just can't get how that woman's mind functions..." He heard the sound of Eren's pencil and glanced in his direction. "Hmm?"

_But Dr. Hanji is so nice!_

"...in a creepy, disturbing sort of way, sure." Levi acknowledged sourly, sitting down next to Eren, the brunet fidgeting slightly as he did. It didn't escape Levi's notice. "...if you have to use the bathroom that badly, go ahead..."

Embarrassed, Eren jerked up in his seat.

_I DO NOT have to use the bathroom!_

"Then what do you want?"

"..." Eren fidgeted more before finally writing a response, half-hiding behind his notebook in shame.

_I want to kiss..._

Levi raised an eyebrow before reaching out to force the notebook down with one hand. With the other, he tilted Eren's chin and descended on his lips.

Their kiss was a bit rougher this time, Levi was finding it more and more difficult to hold back when it came to the brat. Eren's eyes fluttered shut as his hand shyly traveled to Levi's shoulder.

Levi kept his eyes half-open, preferring to watch the brunet's expressions as he slowly claimed Eren's mouth, Eren's grip on his shoulder tightening involuntarily as he did-

"Woof! Woof!" Bean suddenly nosed his way between them, barking happily as he licked Eren's cheek.

"...stupid mutt..." Levi hastily pushed the sheepdog away before he could be slobbered on as well. Eren laughed silently, hugging Bean and burying his face into the thick fur to hide the redness in his cheeks.

_He saw your tongue, Levi, so he wanted to join in!_

"...Eren... No. Just... no." Levi hastily turned away. "Come on, we need to get ready..."

Still a little flushed from Levi's kiss, Eren stood obediently, giving Bean one last pat.

_Levi, how did you get Bean?_

"...I didn't get him."

Flip. _Did you get him from Dr. Hanji?_

"...more like she forced him on me because she couldn't take care of both Bean and Sonny..." Levi explained, pocketing his car keys. "...hmm..." He paused on his way to the sink. "Now that I think about it, what the hell do brats wear these days?"

_...Do you think Dr. Hanji should come with us?_

Levi shook his head vehemently. "Like hell she should. I don't want her putting anymore weird things on you."

Eren gave him a mischievous smile.

_But Levi, you said you didn't hate the maid dress!_

"...all right, fine." Levi admitted grudgingly. "Maybe I didn't, but I _would_ hate other people seeing you in that thing." He brushed his fingers gently against Eren's dog-slobber-free-cheek. "So please, Eren, let's get only _guy_ clothes today."

Eren nodded, giggling noiselessly.

"...shut up, brat."

_I'm very happy right now, Levi!_

"...because of the maid dress?" Levi questioned, a hint of incredulity in his tone.

The brunet shook his head, still smiling.

_Because, I'm a part of Levi's world!_

Levi blinked. "...oh..."

Eren continued to write.

_So I don't care what happens _

Flip. _As long as I am with Levi!_

"..." Levi stared at Eren for a while, the response "Stop being so fucking adorable and marry me" on his lips, but he settled for ruffling Eren's hair and turning away. "...yeah, I know. Me too."

* * *

**I should just rename this chapter to... Hanji and fluff. O-O" Three words basically sums up the whole thing... but anyway...**

******Thank you guys for all the reviews! ^.^ Just reading them gets me pumped to type out the next chapter! I might be gone for a while, but I assure you, I WILL RETURN, I PROMISE! -waves sword for emphasis-**


	7. No, I Won't Leave You!

**A/N: OH ME GOSH IT'S 2 AM I'M DOOMED.**

**...anyway, really sorry about the last chapter. ^0^" -common sense appears- See, Raikun, that is why you do not update two of the fics at the same time when you are rushing and behind schedule- **

**-elbows common sense out of the way- Anyway, I'd just like to thank everyone who was really nice and understanding! =) No one was a jerk about it, so I'm really grateful for that. XD I'd write you all prize fics if you'd want, but my writing can really suck, just to warn you...**

**Anyway, onto the next chapter! So glad I could get this up...**

* * *

"...Hey, Eren, this looks good. Here, hold it up like that. ...Yeah, it looks like it'll fit you. Okay. Let's just buy seven more of the same kind. All right. We're done now."

_Wow! That was fast, Levi!_

"I know, right?" Levi replied monotonously, holding the bags filled with Eren's new clothing. "Hmm. That was a lot less headache than I thought it would be."

The brunet grinned as he held up his notebook.

_Then can we go buy plants for Grishy and Car?_

"...do we have to?"

Eren gave Levi his best pleading eyes again.

_Please!?_

Flip. _Their home seems kinda empty without anything..._

"...fine." Levi mumbled as he set the bags down neatly in the backseat of the car. "But if that's the case, we need to buy them a proper bowl to live in. There's no way in hell I'm letting my cooking pot be a fish tank forever."

_You could always buy a new cooking pot, Levi._ Eren suggested innocently as he tossed down the bag he had been carrying.

Flip. _Besides, I thought you'd be disgusted._

Flip. _Having fish live in something you usually cook food in._

Levi shrugged nonchalantly. "If I didn't, you would have spent the whole time complaining on how the fish needed a better place to stay in, which would have honestly been a lot more irritating then having the damn things in my cooking ware."

Much to his slight irritation/secret happiness, he found Eren beaming at him again. "...what?"

_Levi is so nice sometimes!_

Flip. _Even if he doesn't want to admit it!_

"...shut up..." By now, they were in the pet store. Eren stared curiously at the rows of fake aquatic plants, curiously reaching out to finger the plastic leaves.

_Levi, these feel really weird!_

Flip. _How can they be so green without water?_

"...magic." The word have eventually became Levi's explanation for things he didn't feel like having to explain to the brunet.

Eren's eyes grew wide as he nodded eagerly in understanding.

_Oh, I see now!_

"Yeah. Should we buys some of these?" Levi asked, scanning the plants as well. If they were fake, it would be less one thing to take care of...

Eren started to write a reply, but a loud voice nearby interrupted them.

"Hey! It's Mr. Levi and Eren again!" Both males turned around to see the same group of teenagers they had seen at the festival. Chattering happily, they crowded around Levi and Eren eagerly.

"Eren! Hi!"

"You remember us, don't you?"

"What's up?"

"Ah, it's Mr. Levi!"

"I still can't believe he exists!"

"...why aren't you brats in school?" Levi inquired grumpily as Eren tentatively held up his notebook.

_Hello! I remember you,_ but...

Flip. _ I'm sorry, I still don't know your names._

"Hahahaha, that's fine! I don't think we gave you our names anyway!" The boy with the buzz-cut exclaimed, reaching out to shake Eren's hand. "I'm Connie! It's nice to meet you, Eren!"

"Hang on, I don't think Eren gave you his name, either..." Levi remarked, narrowing his eyes suspiciously.

"S'at's cuz' hoctaa Ha'shii's alkin' ll ahout uuu' eyes'! (That's because Dr. Hanji's talking all about you guys!)" The girl who had been speaking finally swallowed her mouthful of food. "I'm Sasha! I heard you really like food too, Eren! What's your favorite food!? I like eating hamburgers the most!"

"Wait a minute, exactly WHAT has Hanji been saying?"

"...I don't think you would want to know, Mr. Levi..."

"...And I think I need to pay that crazy bat a visit. Eren, I'll be right back..."

Eren nodded before replying to Sasha's question.

_What's a hamburger?_

"YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT A H-" Bertholdt promptly gave Sasha another ice cream ("Hey, no food in the pet shop!"), effectively cutting off the rest of her rant. "Don't mind Sasha, Eren, she's just a food-obsessed freak. I'm Bertholdt! You remember me and Jean from the festival, right?"

The said boy, who had been standing a bit away from the whole group, looked towards Eren grudgingly. "...hey. Sorry about before. It was kind of immature of me."

Eren studied Jean carefully for a few seconds before nodding and giving him a wary smile.

_Yeah, maybe I shouldn't have shoved you like that._

"Yeah."

"..."

"Hahaha!" A larger blond gave Jean an affectionate slap on the shoulder. "You've gotta loosen up sometimes, Jean! You take things way too seriously! Reiner!" He added to Eren, a friendly smile on his face. "I heard you're new in town! Are you going to go to school here?"

_Hi, Reiner. I don't think so..._

"Really!? How old are you?"

Levi, who had been walking out of the pet shop to find and throttle a certain doctor, stopped in his tracks, glancing at Eren warily before hurriedly speaking up. "The brat's ni-"

Eren had already written his answer and was showing it to his new friends, eyebrows raising as he did.

_I'm 19.4 years old!_

"Nineteen point.. four?"

"Wow! You're older than all of us! You're old, Eren!"

"You actually keep track of stuff like that!? That's so weird!"

"Shut up, Jean! That's so awesome! So that means you were born in January?"

Eren, catching sight of Levi's slightly surprised face, smiled and gave him a quick wink before turning back to the group.

_Yes, that's right!_

"Ooh, I'm born in January too!" Bertholdt remarked excitedly. "What day you born on!?"

_25._

The brat was lying... Levi realized as Eren silently laughed with the teenagers. And... he was actually doing a pretty good job of it, contrary to Levi's expectations. Sighing, Levi gave him a small wave before buying the fake plants and sitting outside of the pet shop.

Eren was now demonstrating his talent for determining fish genders. "Say, Eren, what gender is that fish? The big blue one that looks like a potato chip!"

_Female._

"Hmm... what about that one, Eren?" Connie questioned, pointing to another tank.

_Male._

"This one?"

_...It's still too early to see what gender they are._

"HUH!? WHAT THE HECK DOES THAT MEAN!?"

"Jean, stop being so loud! You're going to get us kicked out of here!"

"If anyone's going to get us kicked out of here, it's gotta be you, french fry girl!"

"You're _still_ calling her that name, Jean? Anyway, you know a lot about fishes, don't you, Eren?"

Eren shrugged modestly, his green eyes twinkling. Eyes that Levi could spend his whole life-

"And we have caught it on camera!" A voice announced, doing a rather poor impersonation of a dramatic narrator. "The grumpy shrimp checking out a potential mate he plans to court!"

"..."

Hanji hastily put away her phone. "Just kidding, Levi, just kidding. I really didn't have it on recording."

"...have you finally calmed down from your insane high?" Despite his tone, Levi made no move to throttle her. "So you've been spending rumors about us, Hanji?"

The doctor chuckled, sitting down next to Levi. "Only spreading the good news that the old bachelor has finally hooked up with someone." Her smile grew as she saw the bag Levi was holding. "What's that you're holding there? Something from the pet shop? And I thought you were only going to buy him clothes today!"

Levi snorted quietly. "Damn brat. At this rate, I'll end up spoiling him too much."

"Well, you're loaded, so you won't have trouble at all supporting him and your neet lifestyle!" Hanji teased. She suddenly lapsed into a more serious expression. "Hey, Levi... do you still want to see those x-rays I took from before? Of Eren's throat?"

Levi watched Eren motion eagerly to Reiner and Bertholdt. "...No. I don't need to see them."

"Oh?" Hanji quirked her head curiously. "What do you mean?"

"I still won't believe that Eren's a former merman. But I don't care about that anymore. You know..." Levi flicked off an invisible speck from his knee. "Your psychology tests have a flaw."

"Hmm?"

"Something bad happened to that kid." Levi explained. " I don't know exactly what, but he's experienced some sort of trauma. But I'll wait. When Eren feels like telling me, I'll listen to the brat."

"You're quite serious." Hanji commented quietly, still smiling behind her glasses. "I never thought you'd act like this around someone."

Levi was still staring at Eren. "Me neither. He reminds me of... the sun. He's damn annoying, causes all sorts of trouble, and he'll eventually be the death of you. But..." His voice trailed off before continuing again. "The sun's bright. And warm. And the planet wouldn't exist without it."

"Heehee, I see..."

"..."

"..."

Hanji suddenly sprang up and threw her arms around Levi's neck, her face colliding painfully with his chin.

"Wh-what the-"

"GAAAAAAAAAAAAH YOU LITTLE SHRIMP! WHEN DID YOU GET SO STRONG AND MANLY! IT'S TOO MUCH! I CAN'T!" With that, Hanji ran off, giggling and cackling madly to herself again.

Levi stared after her for several seconds before shaking his head and turning back to Eren. He would never get used to that woman's lunatic behavior.

* * *

"By the way, Eren..." Sasha whispered loudly, trying to be appear secretive and failing. "What is your relationship with Mr. Levi?"

"Yeah!" Connie added eagerly, his face full of curiosity. "The Doc's been talking about it, all right, but we all want to know the truth!"

"And everyone and their mother saw you guys almost kiss at the festival-"

"SHUT UP! WE WILL NOT TALK ABOUT THAT TIME!"

"..."

Blushing, Eren looked furtively back and forth before writing in his notebook.

_Levi and I are... together. I think._

Everyone nearly fell down in excitement.

"WHAT!?"

"No kidding!"

"Woot! Way to go kid!" Connie cheered, clapping Eren on the shoulder. "I was pretty sure that he had to be, like, asexual or something!"

"So he LOVES you!?"

_...I think so?_

"HUH!?"

"How far have the two of you gone?" Bertholdt whispered excitedly, his eyebrows nearly disappearing in his hair.

Eren blinked in confusion.

_What... I don't understand..._

"Did you... like... you know, sleep together!?"

"..."

"...he's not saying anything."

"He's red as a beet."

"They must have!"

Eren froze and hastily shook his head wildly.

"Hahahahahahaha, are you sure about that, Eren!?"

_I am sure! Please stop laughing!_

Reiner put a comforting arm on Eren's shoulder. "Don't mind them, Eren, they're just kids being stupid.""

"...Reiner, you're not that much older than us.." Connie pointed out quietly.

"But hey, doesn't it feel weird?" Jean asked despite himself. "I mean... the guy's shorter than you, so isn't it a little..."

Eren blinked.

_Why is it weird?_

Flip. _Isn't it normal for the smaller one to top?_

"EH-EHHHHHHHHHHHH?" The teenagers promptly exploded around him.

"SO YOU GUYS HAVE DONE IT?!"

"THAT SHORTY ACTUALLY-"

_WHAT? NO! WE DID NOT!_

An arm suddenly draped itself over Eren's shoulders again. "You annoying brats are making too much of a racket." Levi remarked irritably, tugging Eren closer to him. "Come on, kid, let's go."

Eren's hand trembled in embarrassment as he wrote his next lines.

_Okay, Levi!_

Flip. _Thank you everyone for today! __I'll see you guys later! _

"Ah, all right, bye Eren!"

"See you later!"

"Let's hang out again!"

"Remember to use protection!"

Eren waved back at them happily before allowing Levi to drag him out of the store.

"Hn. You looked like you enjoyed yourself."

_Yes, I did!_

"That's good."

_But I like Levi the best!_

"...you better." Levi mumbled, jerking Eren down to kiss his forehead.

* * *

"I was kind of surprised when you told them you were nineteen instead of one hundred and ninety four, brat." Levi admitted as he drove them back, his eyes fixed on the road.

Eren gave him a quizzical look.

_Of course I told them that, Levi._

Flip. _If I told them something like that,_

Flip. _they wouldn't have believed me!_

"...then why the heck did you have no trouble telling Hanji and Erwin and me?"

_Because I trust you guys!_

Flip. _Completely, I mean._

Oh. So he had the brat's trust. Levi clenched the steering wheel and wondered how a piece knowledge could be so gratifying yet terrifying. "...I see."

"..."

"...by the way... So I'll top because I'm smaller, huh?"

Eren almost jumped out of his seat at the words. Levi had to bite back his chuckle."So I guess my height's good for something after all..."

"..."

_Stupid Levi._

"Heh..."

Eren didn't write anything for a while, and Levi didn't think much of it, since Eren was probably sulking from his last comment.

He turned once he heard the sound of scribbling again.

_Levi, can I ask you something weird?_

"Hm?"

_If I was a bad person before, would you still like me?_

"...well, if I was a bad person in the past, Eren, would _you_ still like me?" Levi questioned, his eyes going back to the road.

Eren looked out of the window, his eyes deep in thought before he scribbled his answer.

_I think I would still like Levi._

"And why would you still like me, Eren?"

Flip. _Because Levi is not the past Levi._

Flip. _So I don't think it matters._

Levi gave Eren a rare smile. "...And that, Yeager, is my answer to your first question."

Eren blinked in surprise. He paused, chewing the inside of his cheek, then started to write again.

_Levi, I want to see the ocean._

"Huh!?" Levi almost crashed the car in shock. "WHY?! NO! Aren't you afraid you'll fall in?"

Eren smiled back at Levi's worried expression.

_I believe Levi will protect me._

Flip. _So I'm not that worried._

"...fine." Levi said after a reluctant , pulling the car over. "I'll take you to see the stupid ocean, but you're going to have to view it from a DISTANCE."

_I'm okay with that._

* * *

The ocean glimmered and sparkled in the sun. Eren stared at it, wearing an expression of what looked like quiet sadness. Levi stood behind him, his arms wrapped securely around the brunet's waist as they stood on the cliff (very far from the edge).

"...can we go now?" Levi didn't bother to hide the impatience in his voice. "I really don't understand why the hell we had to come here in the first place."

Eren cracked a smile, reaching to write in his notebook.

_Levi, you really are good at protecting me, aren't you?_

Flip. _I can barely see the ocean at all from here._

The black-haired man frowned deeply. "Good. That's how it should be. Now let's go."

Eren ignored him and continued to write.

_The ocean's been my home for almost two hundred years, Levi._

Flip. _For a long time, I didn't think I would ever want to leave it._

Flip. _I didn't think I would fall in love with a human._

It was rather strange of Eren to use the word "human", but Levi was too distracted by the meaning of the sentence to care.

Eren continued to write.

_It's really strange, Levi._

Flip. _I haven't known you for very long._

Flip. _But when I see you, I feel so happy._

Flip. _Whenever you touch me, I feel even happier._

Flip. _Even when I dream, I think about you._

Flip. _I didn't really mind giving up my voice that much.._

Flip. _But sometimes I wish I had a voice just so that I could say your name._

"..." Levi tightened his grip on Eren's body. "Shitty brat. You don't need a voice to make me happy."

Eren squeezed Levi's hand before scribbling more.

_I'm sorry we had to go to the ocean, Levi._

They were both too far from the cliff to notice the unusual sea waves that started to cling to the edges of the rock, as if clambering to reach above.

Flip. _But I just wanted to say goodbye to it._

"Then say it already, for hell's sake, Eren!" Levi growled. "Before a fucking earthquake comes and makes you fall off the damn cliff!"

His green eyes serious, Eren began to write slowly.

_Levi, I have to tell you_ something.

_Long ago, I used to-_

**RUMBLE!**

Without warning, the ground beneath them shuddered, knocking both of the two off balance. "Wha-what-" Levi managed to choke out in a mixture of horror and consternation, while Eren gave him a look of sheer terror.

"You've got to be fucking kidding me! Earthquakes aren't supposed to come out of nowhere, goddamn it!"

**BOOOOM!**

The earth suddenly split open, chunks of the cliff were falling into the sea, the waves towering over them. Levi couldn't believe what was happening in front of him. "Eren! We need to get out of here!"

Eren just stood where he was, frozen, his eyes fixed on the water below. Suddenly the ground under his feet gave way, sending the brunet plummeting down the cliff, his green eyes bulging in panic as he opened his mouth in a silent scream.

"EREN!" Before Eren knew what was happening, he was roughly thrown back onto the cliff edge, hitting solid ground with a thump. His heart pounding wildly, Eren whirled backward to see that now _Levi_ was starting to fall off the cliff.

Levi saw Eren mouth his name in panic before quickly reaching for his hand. Their fingers brushed.

And then a particularly large wave closed over Levi, his hand slipping out of Eren's frantic grasp as the water flooded his senses, and the world became black.

* * *

...

...

...

...

...Voices. Loud voices. Frantic voices.

The voices didn't matter because Eren didn't have a voice. Eren. Where was Eren?

Levi was able to protect Eren, right? Eren was safe, right? Eren...

"...Eren... didn't fall into the ocean, right?" His voice was raspy and weak as he spoke. Levi wearily opened his eyes, realizing that he was lying on the ground. His body was drenched in sea water.

"L-Levi..." He blinked and recognized Hanji's face, her glasses were off as her eyes were full of tears. "L-Levi, I-"

"Where is Eren?"

"I... h-h-he..." Hanji hiccuped several times before attempting to compose herself. "Th... the earthquake came out of nowhere, L-Levi, the whole town is in a panic-"

"Eren?"

"He... he saved you, Levi. When you fell into the water, he... E-Eren went after you."

"Then where the hell is he?"

Hanji's voice trembled before breaking completely. "I... I don't know..."

"NO!" In a flash, Levi was up again. Waves of pain coursed through his body, but he couldn't care less. "Eren, Eren, he can't be-"

"Le-Levi," Hanji clung to his arm desperately, "C-calm down! You're in no position to move-"

"I don't want to hear it!" Levi shook his arm from her grasp and started to run. "THAT STUPID BRAT! WHY DIDN'T HE LISTEN TO ME!?"

"LEVI!" His former classmate shrieked, beginning to stand to go after him, but Erwin grabbed Hanji's shoulder, his face full of sorrow. "Hanji, leave him."

"But, Erwin-"

"Let him go. You can't stop him."

* * *

Levi went to the place where he had first found Eren. He went there because he didn't know where else to go.

At the beach, there was no sign of the chaos from earlier. The weather was beautiful.

The sky was so blue, it was nearly painful to look at it. A few white clouds drifted lazily as a slight breeze blew. Levi felt as if it was mocking him.

"Eren..." He said slowly, not able to believe what had just happened. Eren, who had just been by his side a moment ago. Eren, who had thrown his world in complete disarray. Eren, who had liked wearing a maid dress. Eren, who was a demon of the road. Eren, who had smiled and blushed for him. Eren, who had laughed and giggled with him. Eren, who kissed him. Eren, who he had woken up to. Eren, who he had kissed. Eren, who told Levi he loved him.

"EREN!" Levi heard someone screaming the boy's name, a split second later, he realized it was himself. "Ah... ah... hah..." Panting slightly, he slid down on the sand, his hands clutching his hair. "Eren..."

Levi felt like he lost his mind, so when he first spotted the mop of dark brown hair in the water, he thought he was hallucinating.

It didn't stop him, however, from desperately rushing out into the water. "Eren!?" The mop of hair rose, and Levi saw the most beautiful shade of green in the world again. He thought his heart would stop beating.

"EREN!" He cried desperately, and he was nearly convinced it was an illusion when Eren shrank back from him.

"Are you hurt!?" Levi demanded, reaching out to grasp Eren's hand. His eyes widened as he clutched the tan flesh, he could touch Eren, Eren was real, Eren was safe- "Eren, thank god-"

"D-don't come any closer!" A voice suddenly cried, a beautiful voice, Levi thought, as Eren tore his hand away from his.

"What the hell are you saying?" Levi grabbed Eren's hand again, squeezing it as hard as he could. "Wait, you can speak? No, never mind, that's not important. My god, Eren, I thought I would never see you again!" Before the brunet could make another protest, Levi quickly embraced him, holding Eren close.

And then he felt the scales.

"...Huh?" Levi glanced down. Eren took advantage of his confusion and quickly pushed Levi off of him.

"P-please get away from me... Levi..."

"Wh-what..." Utterly speechless, Levi gawked at what used to be Eren's legs. Instead, a shimmering blue-green tail swayed below the ocean's surface, twinkling in the sunlight. "E...Eren?"

There was an extremely long stretch of silence.

"...well damn." Levi said, slowly bringing his gaze back to Eren's face. "No wonder you liked wearing dresses better."

Eren promptly burst into tears. "L-Levi... I-I'm so sorry! It wasn't you, it wasn't you, Levi, it was me! I saw you fall into the water and you were drowning, and, and, I didn't think, I just dove in after you!" Wiping his face furiously, Eren shook his head. "No, I did think. I didn't want you to die, Levi... I should have just gone away but I heard you call my name and I just couldn't, I couldn't..."

"...I don't believe this..." Levi cautiously extended a hand towards Eren's waist. Eren hesitantly nodded and allowed Levi to touch the area where his skin became scales.

"I..." Eren swallowed thickly. "I... I need to tell you everything, Levi. Everything about me."

Levi's fingers slowly trailed off Eren's body, his eyes not leaving Eren's face. "...and... I'll listen..." The man said slowly, the shock still clearly etched in his face.

"I... I never knew who my father was." Eren began, his tail curling as he spoke. "But I had his surname, Yeager, and I knew his given name, Grisha, my mother used to cry it out in her sleep. My mother raised me. Her name was Carla. She was my world. But, one day, when I was only twelve years old... she was killed."

Under the water, Eren's hands formed into fists. "She was caught in a sea net. I tried to untangle her, but I couldn't make it in time. The fisherman dragged her up and, thinking she was a demon, hacked her into pieces." Eren closed his eyes, as if the action made the memory less painful. "On bad nights, I could still hear her screams."

Levi said nothing, his hair dripping with water.

"I had always despised humans, but from the day, I became obsessed with annihilating them." Eren went on, opening his eyes. "I banded with a group of merpeople and we set out to destroy the human race. We sunk countless ships... we made so many soldiers drown... I must have killed hundreds of them, Levi."

The man remained silent, still listening carefully.

"But then... at least sixty years after I began killing humans... I got caught in a net. I thought I was going to die like my mother. An old man came to me, I was certain he was going to kill me with his knife but instead... he set me free." Eren rubbed his arm, as if remembering a sensation of the net leaving his skin.

"That incident... what do humans say? Turned my world upside down? After that, I could never kill another human again. I realized... that's there was not much difference between humans and merpeople. Humans could still care and love like us. I was still obsessed with humans, but in a different way. I wanted to understand them. I wanted to understand how the very race that killed my mother could save me. As the years passed, I began to wish to be a human. To understand those feelings."

Eren smiled bitterly as he thrashed his tail. "So here I am, over a hundred years later. I turned from a deadly shark to a harmless guppy. I made a deal with the sea witch to become a human, but if I ever went back into the ocean, I would be forever a merman again. So I became human and then I met you, Levi."

Eren's eyes filled with tears, which he hastily rubbed away. "Like the idiot I am, I fell hopelessly in love with you! Imagine! Me, a human killer, in love with a human! And now I can't ever be with you... I'll never be human again!" His voice beginning to crack, Eren paused, breathing heavily.

Levi simply watched him, saying nothing.

Eren suddenly let out a hysterical laugh. "Levi, how do you feel about that!? You're in love with a merman! A merman who can never leave the sea! Now you'll leave, won't you? Now you'll stop loving me, won't you?" He finally broke into sobs, hiding his face with his arms. "Of course you will!"

Levi continued to watch him for several seconds. Then, he finally opened his mouth to speak.

"Of course I won't. I'll never leave you or stop loving you, no matter what you are, you shit-faced goddamn brat."

* * *

**...yeah, I know, the action was way too rushed. I'm sorry. ;_;" It's just how the story goes, but I don't think I ended in that bad of a place...**


	8. Only One Problem Left

**A/N: Hi guys! :D So excited that I could get this chapter going!**

**Sorry that the last chapter was kind of sad, but hopefully this one will make up for it! Thank you so much for your reviews and support! ^-^**

**Ah, btw, I forgot to do this before, but better late that never... Kids... DON'T DO ANYTHING JUST BECAUSE YOU READ IT FROM THIS FIC AND THOUGHT IT WOULD BE COOL! By anything I mean breaking into someone's house, letting someone without a license or permit drive a vehicle, kicking a person's butt, driving like Eren did, etc., etc.. I know rules can be tiring but some of them actually exist for a reason. ^ ^"**

**And also, credits to Danni Tran and Anna for Hanji's "I knew it I knew it" and the "demon of the road" part respectively. XD so sorry I used your comments without permission and kept forgetting to do this...  
**

**Now onto the chapter! (Oh what the heck, you guys probably skipped over this anyway, I wouldn't blame you!) XD**

* * *

Despite the fact that he could now speak, Eren could only stare at Levi, utterly dumbfounded.

"..."

"...I thought you got your voice back already." Levi remarked, having already resumed his usual stoic expression. "Why are you just floating there gaping like a retarded monkey? Did becoming a fish shrink your brain too?"

Still shell-shocked, Eren shook his head slowly. "No... no... Levi, what are you saying? What are you saying!? You're-you're confused right now! You're not thinking clearly!"

Levi gave a scornful scoff in response. "I've never thought more clearly in my life. You just caught me off guard." Seizing a handful of the merman's hair, Levi kissed Eren without warning, green eyes going wide as he plundered the slightly salty mouth. Eren's slightly salty mouth. This was still Eren. His Eren.

The man finally pulled back only to drag Eren flush against him, breathing into his wet hair. This was still Eren. Eren's scent. Eren's eyes. Eren's displeased and uncomfortable expression. Eren. "Eren... I lo-"

"N-NO!" Eren nearly screamed, his eyes going even wider in panic. "Levi, DON'T! I'm a monster! A freak! I don't deserve-"

"Shut it, brat." Levi interrupted sharply, his face too close to Eren's. "You just put me through hell and worst in the last few minutes and you think being a fucking merman will get you off the hook!? Well, it won't, goddamn it, Eren! Don't try to fuck with me!"

Eren began to tremble, still grasping for words. "Levi... you're not serious!"

Levi's eyes narrowed dangerously. "Just try me." He wrapped his arms around Eren again and placed a surprisingly soft kiss on the side of his forehead. "Eren, come home with me now."

"Levi-"

"That was an order, by the way, not a request."

"LEVI!" Eren shrieked, as if his exclamation would make the human see sense. "Have you gone crazy!? There's no way we can be together now! We are different SPECIES!"

"And I don't give a fuck. Now let's go." With that, Levi promptly lifted Eren half out of the water, giving a slight grunt as he did. "Gah... you're heavier as a mermaid, brat..."

Eren practically shrieked in terror. "What- STOP! Levi! Put me down! THINK, Levi! With me like this, you won't be able to have a normal life! I want you to enjoy a normal life like you should! I don't want to burden you down like this!"

"I don't enjoy life period." Levi shot back, a hint of anger present in his voice. "So come home with me."

The brunet shook his head desperately. "You say that, Levi, but you're not thinking about what happens later! How on ocean will we live!?"

"Don't be stupid, Eren, you'll live in my bath tub." The black-haired man stated, as if it were obvious.

"Wha- But... but I won't be able to be with you all the time!" Eren protested, tugging feebly at Levi's arms. "And... and... I won't be able to sleep with you!"

Levi tilted his head thoughtfully. "...Then I'll get you a portable bath tub so I can take you everywhere. And if you really want to sleep together, then I can just put on a diving suit and climb in the bath tub with you."

"You won't be able to go out with me!"

"...Eren, are you honestly ignoring the fact that I've been staying in my house like a hermit or are you just fucking stupid?"

"We..." Eren suddenly blushed deeply, looking away from Levi. "We won't even be able to sleep together... that is... ...sex..."

Levi glared at him before leaning over and biting Eren's ear, earning a surprised yelp from the brunet. "L-LEVI!?"

"Then I'll just make you give me blowjobs forever. Do you know what that is?"

"I DO AND I AM _NOT_ DOING THAT FOREVER!"

"Tch, what a troublesome brat you are. Then I'll just get Hanji to operate on you and give you legs and all the stuff between them."

Eren tried bringing up a more serious concern. "Levi... now that I'm a mermaid, I won't be able to age. I'll just stay the same way for a hundred years and then turn into sea foam, while you'll grow old in front of me and die and I can't, I can't, I can't-"

Levi thumbed away the tears appearing in Eren's eyes. "Then I'll get Hanji to elongate my life for a hundred years too, and find a way to keep myself looking young until then."

"S-stupid Levi! That's not even possible!"

Levi simply stared straight into Eren's face. "I love you, Eren, so I'll make it happen even if it is impossible."

Eren finally settled for letting out a scream of frustration. "Have you gone crazy, Levi!? Do you know how much of a mess I'll cause?"

"I don't care."

Eren's face went from blushing to paling. "You HAVE gone crazy, Levi... and it's all my fault..."

Levi rested his forehead against Eren's. "Then fucking take responsibility and let me bring you home, Eren."

The merman stared back at him, frightened by the intensity of Levi's gaze. "I... what if I don't want to come home?"

"Do you honestly not want to?" Levi asked, his eyes barely blinking.

"Y... yes! Of course I don't want to!" Eren turned his head away in a sudden burst of anger. "Now that I am once again a merman, I have no business with the human world! There is a reason why I was made a merman, and I will not fight it any longer! So please, Levi, let me go! Now!"

Levi only tightened his grip on Eren. "Is that really true?"

"How many times do you need to ask!?"

Levi's glare intensified. "If it's true, shitty brat, then why the hell aren't you pushing me away?"

Eren visibly gulped at the question, but still refused to meet the grey gaze. "I... I am still weak in my merman form. I haven't gotten fully used to swimming again. That's all."

"Bullshit! Eren." One of Levi's hands grasped Eren's chin, forcing the brunet to look up at him. "I know who your father was."

"E-eh!? What do you mean, Le-"

"Erwin found his journal when he was looking for people that could have possibly been related to you." Levi explained, loosening his grip on Eren's chin to caress his cheek instead. "He met your mother the same way I met you. Then she went into the ocean to save him, like you did."

Eren could only give him another blank stare, unable to process everything he had just heard.

Undeterred by Eren's silence, Levi continued to caress his cheek. "Eren... do you really want to become like your mother? Crying out my name at night when you think nobody can hear you? Eren, just be with me and be happy. You know, Eren, I haven't been happy for most of my life. I've always been somewhat of an unfeeling, uncaring, grumpy person with a shitty attitude of I-don't-give-a-fuck. It's not like I had any reason to be like that, it was just the way I was, and I didn't think anything was wrong with that. ...But..."

Levi halted. "But... after I met you, I... I actually... well... you actually make me feel... ungrumpy."

"...ungrumpy?"

"Yes."

"Is that a big deal?"

"Yes."

The brunet's hand slowly crept up to cover Levi's. "...Levi, did you really feel that bad when you couldn't find me?"

Closing his eyes, Levi nodded, brushing his lips against Eren's shoulder. "I thought I was going to lose my mind. I thought I was hallucinating when I first saw you. You don't know how happy I was to be able to have you here again, Eren... And I know it's fucking weird because, really, I haven't known you for any more than a few days. But apparently, a few days was all you needed to completely fuck up my life."

"...I..." Eren's voice trembled with badly hidden anguish as he hung his head. "I was also very happy. I was so happy when you came in the water for me, Levi. I was so so happy when you told me you wouldn't leave me, even if I was a merman! But I was so afraid! I am still so afraid!"

"There's no need to be afraid, Eren." Levi assured calmly. "We're not doing anything wrong, and I won't ever change my mind. I have a feeling we've both been unhappy for most of our lives, so let's just fuck all logic and be fucking happy right now."

"I... I..." Eren swallowed before raising his head, his face fearful and determined and full of emotion. "I want to be with Levi! More than anything! Levi! LEVI! I love you! Please don't leave me!"

Levi snorted before letting go of Eren's face and opening his arms wide. "How many times do you need me to fucking say it, brat!"

His green eyes full of pain, Eren threw himself into Levi's arms, trying and failing to hold back his sobs. "Levi... Levi... I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you so much-"

Levi immediately clutched Eren even tighter, quietly muttering uncharacteristically sweet words to him between chaste kisses.

"A-ah, Levi, what are we going to do!?"

"Shhhh, it'll be all right." The black-haired man murmured, his voice partially muffled by Eren's hair. "Eren, I want you to take me to the sea witch. Maybe she'll make you human if you give up your voice again."

Eren shook his head a second time, trying desperately to steady his voice. "N-no, Levi, she's not like that, you don't know her! If Annie sees that I've fallen in love, which she will, she'll claim that my love is the best part of me and she'll take that away! Or she'll claim that I need Levi's heart or blood or something to become human! Or she'll make me human again but turn you into a merman!"

"...The sea witch's name is Annie?" Levi mused, stroking Eren's hair. "Hm. Sounds pretty mundane for a sea witch if you ask me."

"TH-THAT'S all you have to say!?"

Levi shrugged. "You know, brat, your voice is really annoying. It's loud and screechy and won't stop." He tucked a loose strand of wet hair behind Eren's ear. "It really suits you."

Reddening once more, Eren suddenly seemed very interest something below the surface. "Th-that's... really mean of you, Levi."

"I know."

"I have a feeling something like that really shouldn't make me happy... Ugh, I'm such a weirdo..."

"I know." Levi moved to kiss him again, but Eren placed a hand on his chest, the other wiping furiously at his eyes.

"I... I don't understand, Levi! I love you so much, why can't we be the same species!?"

"...Stop crying like that, brat, I'm not that much of a sadist." Levi pressed another kiss to Eren's temple.

"Urgh... I'm not crying..." The brunet muttered as the pale arms continued to grasp him comfortingly.

"Eren, stop crying like that. No matter what, I'll find a way for you to be human again."

"But what if you can't!?" Eren wailed into Levi's shoulder, his tail flapping wildly.

"Shut up. Don't underestimate me. I will. But if I really can't..." Levi rubbed Eren's back soothingly. "Then I'll find a way to become a merperson."

Eren attempted to chuckle weakly. "P-please don't do that, Levi, grumpy mermen aren't that popular..."

"Hmph. Sure didn't stop you from falling in LOVE with me."

"Aaaaaaaah!" Eren let go of Levi to clutch his head in embarrassment. "I shouldn't have wrote that! It was so lame!"

"It was." Levi agreed nonchalantly. "But it's the truth. Now, Eren, will you take me to the sea witch or should we just go home like this? If it's the second option, mind you, I need to be careful not to let anyone see your big ass tail..."

Eren wrapped his arms around Levi's neck, blinking at him wearily. "To be honest, Levi, I really don't want to go Annie. She scares me and I don't want you to have to be around her. The only reason why I want to become human now is so that I can be with Levi."

Levi kissed his cheek. "Just because you're part fish doesn't mean you can't still be with me, brat. It'll just make things a hell of a lot more inconvenient."

"Levi, I want you to take me home."

"Then I will." Levi promptly lifted Eren again, starting to turn back towards the shore before the merman interrupted him again.

"I want a confession, Levi."

"...huh?"

"I want Levi to declare his love for me." Eren stated, a slight grin forming on his tear-stained face. "Then I'll come home with Levi."

"..." Levi could feel his eye twitch. "...didn't I already say that I loved you, stupid brat!?"

Eren gave a small nod of acknowledgement. "Yes, you did, Levi, several times. But you always do it in such a... unromantic way." The brunet explained, making a small face of displeasure as he did.

"...because I'm a total fucking romantic." Levi would have thrown his hands up in sheer frustration if he hadn't been holding Eren. "What the hell do you want, shitty brat!? A declaration of marriage or something?"

"That would be nice, Levi, thank you!" Eren said cheerfully, ignoring the sarcasm that had been dripping from Levi's words.

"..."

"...NO." Levi replied adamantly, his face stone. "Like hell I am doing that!"

"Then I won't be coming home with Levi!"

"Shut up! You're coming home with me whether you like it or not!"

His arms still hooked around Levi's neck, Eren gazed at him beseechingly. "Levi, pleasssssssssse!?"

"...FUCK." The writer swore, glaring hard at the sky. "What the hell do they even say at marriages!?"

"Oh, I think I know!" Eren chirped happily. "I saw lots of weddings on boats in the ocean!"

"I'm sure you did, fucking brat..." Levi muttered sourly.

Eren chose to ignore him, flipping his fins thoughtfully. "Hmm, how did it go... I, Eren Yeager, will love you, Levi, for the rest of my life... when you're sick and when you're healthy... when you're happy and even when you're grumpy... when you're mean and when you're mad... ...what else is there?"

"...I'm pretty damn sure that's not what you say, Eren."

"Then say it yourself, Levi!"

"I WILL NOT!" Levi stormed, fuming in anger. "Do you have any idea, you shitty brat, of how much that will KILL my character!? Do you have any idea of how much of my character you're killing now!? Do you have any idea of how much of my character you've killed already!?"

"..." Eren tilted his head innocently. "I don't think I understood most of what you just said, Levi."

"Grrrrrrrrrr..." Levi rested his chin on Eren's shoulder. "Goddamn you, Eren, I cannot believe I am actually going to do this."

"Eheehee, you will, Levi!? That makes me very happy!"

"Shut the fuck up, you brat..."

"..."

"..."

"...Levi, when are you going to-"

"I will! Just..." Levi lifted his head, grimacing as if in pain. "All right... fine... let's just get this stupid thing over with."

The merman and human were respectively too giddy and too grumpy to notice that the water behind them began acting strangely.

"...so..." Levi began awkwardly. "I... Levi..."

"Yes?" Eren asked eagerly.

"...don't rush it. Damn it, Eren, you made me lose my place."

"I did not! Levi is just trying to stall!" Eren argued before noticing something gray coming up behind Levi. Something that looked suspiciously like... A SHARK!?

"All... right... let me start over again..." Levi took another deep breath. "I..."

Yes, Eren realized, it was a shark swimming to Levi. A shark with its mouth wide open and teeth bared. And swimming fast. Very fast.

"I, Levi... will... love... you... Eren Yeager..." Levi managed to choke out chunkily before Eren suddenly ducked out of his arms, giving the shark a quick but powerful punch to the nose and smashing its head with his tail for good measure.

_THWACK! BAM!_

The poor shark quickly sank to the ground, knocked out.

Levi, not having seen anything, turned around, looking at Eren in confused indignation. "Jeez, brat, what the hell are you doing!? If you were going to get this embarrassed, then you shouldn't have asked me to do this in the damn first place!"

"N-no, Levi, you don't understand! That's-"

"Argh, just let me finish!" Levi growled, his hands slamming down to clench Eren's bare shoulders. "Anyway... I will love you for the rest of my fucking life... um... shit, what comes next... to have and to hold?"

Eren spotted another shark, and, panicking, broke free of Levi's grasp and also punched the second shark, this time with so much force that the shark's head actually flew off.

"And- Eren, where the heck did you go!?" Levi whirled around to see Eren shaking in terror, the shark's bleeding corpse had already sunk into the ocean. "...get back here! Anyway, as I was saying, to have and to hold, from this day-"

"YEEEEEEAAAAAGGGGGGH!" Eren screamed, hitting yet another shark out of the way, sending it flying across the water and out of Levi's sight.

"Eren!? Calm the hell down! I'm fucking nervous too!"

"Levi, no, stop, we need to get out of here-"

"Damn it, Eren, I can't stop now! I'll feel even more stupid than I already do! Anyway... to have and to hold, from this day... yeah... for better, for worse-" This time, part of the rocky cliff tumbled down into the sea, headed straight for Levi's head-

Eren gaped in horror. "LEVVIIIIIIIIII!" Still not knowing what was going on, Levi waded over to Eren, the rock just barely missing him and splashing into the water.

"...I don't know what's wrong with you today but I'll just keep going. For better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, some other shit-"

"SERIOUSLY, LEVI, STOP!"

"In sickness and in health-" Still clueless about the entire situation, Levi clamped his arms around Eren again so the merman couldn't move away.

The water began swirling dangerously around them before suddenly turning into a miniature typhoon around them. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH-"

"To love and to cherish-"

The typhoon got stronger-

"UNTIL WE FUCKING DIE!" Levi yelled the last bit, looking just as panicked as Eren but for entirely different reasons.

Miraculously, right after he said the words, the ocean suddenly calmed, leaving them drifting almost peacefully in the sea water.

"..."

"..."

"...that was painfully humiliating." Levi swore, hugging Eren tightly. "PLEASE never make me do that again, Eren."

"...uh..."

"I mean it. I was so embarrassed there could have been a fucking typhoon behind me and I wouldn't have noticed." Levi glanced at Eren sullenly. "...you don't even seem that happy."

Eren finally embraced Levi back, still shocked about what had just happened. "I am just... surprised." The merman took a few wary seconds to ensure that no more dangers were approaching them before smiling brightly and kissing Levi on the cheek. "Thank you, Levi!"

"Whatever, brat." The man suddenly scooped Eren back up, the brunet letting out a small exclamation of surprise. "I'll be lugging you home now."

Eren pouted slightly. "When Levi says that, I feel so heavy."

"That's because you are."

"Hey-" Eren suddenly froze, his indignation turning to shock again.

Levi blinked down at him inquiringly. "Hmm? Eren? What's wrong now?"

Not responding, Eren just stared out farther into the water, his eyes wide in disbelief. "It can't be..."

Thoroughly confused, Levi glanced in the same direction.

"...eh?"

The deeper water was a richer, darker blue, but it was still easy to see the dark shape that broke its surface silently.

"What the-"

Eren's hands slid off of Levi's neck in shock. "Mi... Mikasa?" He whispered quietly.

As if responding to his voice, the dark shape rose slightly, now easily identifiable as the head of a young woman, wisps of her black hair floating as sea water dripped from her fair, Oriental features. A gold circle on her head, she fixed her large dark eyes on Eren with an unreadable expression.

"...you..." The merman began haltingly, as if he wasn't sure of what to say. "You've... you've become ruler, I see. A good thing for the merpeople."

Mikasa said nothing at first, not helping the already-easily-sensed tension in the air. If he looked hard enough, Levi was able to see the faint silhouette of a dark tail in the water.

"...Eren. You would have been a better choice." The mermaid's voice sounded as flat as her expression.

Eren's face twisted into a bitter smile again. "Don't talk nonsense. Of course I would not have been."

Mikasa simply continued to stare at him, her eyes now betraying a hint of emotion. "Why are you doing this? Talking in a language of humans as if it was your own? Risking your life to save one? Declaring that you love one? Would you really go with him, Eren? As a merman?"

"...Mikasa..." Eren moved to slip out of Levi's arms. Instantly, Levi grabbed him back, his grey eyes smoldering at Mikasa. It took a minute or two of Eren holding his hand and muttering reassuring words before the man reluctantly loosened his grip, allowing Eren to swim out towards the mermaid.

Eren paused a short distance across from Mikasa, swallowing nervously. "I... I know, it's crazy. It must be a big shock for you to see what I've become. But..." He reached out to hesitantly touch her cheek. "Levi is my world now. If he's not there, I... I can't breathe. Can you understand?"

Her facade finally breaking, Mikasa lashed her tail in response, but didn't push away Eren's hand. "Of course I do!" She hissed through gritted teeth, her eyes flaming in anger and tears. "_You_ were my world, Eren! I couldn't breathe when you were gone!"

Eren stroked her cheek sadly. "I know, I'm sorry. It was wrong of me to leave like that. But I couldn't risk staying. I couldn't bring myself to kill any more humans, and I would have endangered everyone, especially you and Armin. You still stayed strong and kept going without me, and I'm proud of you for being able to do that-"

"Then you can keep going without _him_!" Mikasa interrupted, clutching Eren's hand desperately. "Please, Eren! Don't go with him! Come back to us!"

Levi, not taking his eyes off the two merpeople, started involuntarily.

Still smiling, Eren embraced Mikasa with his other arm, holding her close. "Mikasa, I'm sorry. You deserved better than me."

The mermaid only shook her head, hugging Eren back tightly.

"...didn't you love me? Even just a little bit?"

Eren's eyes snapped open at the words as he jerked back to look Mikasa in the face. "Of course I did! I love you even now! But... even if I'm a merman now... I still want to be with Levi. No matter what I tell myself, no matter how crazy I am... I think I still belong with him."

"...I'm sorry..." Mikasa whispered quietly, leaning her head against Eren's shoulder. "I caused it. The earthquake. And the sharks."

"Ah..." Eren blinked before nodding wearily in resignation. "I should have known that was you."

"Are you angry?"

"Just a little. But I understand." Eren kissed the top of Mikasa's head gently. "I know I can never make up for abandoning you, Mikasa. But if it's possible, let me visit you and the others from time to time from now on. I missed you too, you know."

Mikasa remained silent, while Levi frowned impatiently from behind.

"..." In a sudden swift motion, Mikasa raised herself above Eren, her black hair swinging wildly as it broke free of the water's surface.

"Mi-Mikasa!?" Eren exclaimed, bewildered. "Your hair! Why is it so short!?"

Mikasa only clenched something in her hand. "Eren. This one is different. You'll have legs no matter what you do, so you better come back to me every once in a while." With that, she brutally shoved the object into the brunet's mouth, causing him to choke and sputter.

"Eren!?" Inwardly panicking, Levi swam quickly towards the merman. Mikasa suddenly disappeared, her tail splashing back into the water.

Not caring about the mermaid, Levi hastily pulled Eren into his arms. "Eren? Are you all right? What did she do to you?" How could Levi have been so stupid, he should have never left Eren alone with that thing-

His eyes nearly popping out of his head, Eren could only gasp and choke, his whole body shaking as if he was having a seizure. "Eren!" Not knowing what to do, Levi grasped his hand, his mind whirling in fear.

Squeezing Levi's hand back as hard as he could, Eren suddenly threw his head and screamed. "EEEEEEEEEEEEYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"

It was the last sound he ever made.

Levi nearly fell down, partly from the force of Eren's scream, and partly because he had heard that scream before. On a cloudy morning that now seemed eons ago.

A moment later, Levi realized that he was now holding legs, not a tail, and Eren was panting slightly against him, limp from pain, his eyes gazing at Levi incredulously.

They stared at each other blankly for several minutes. Then Eren's face erupted into a smile, the smile that sent Levi's common sense over the edge, and Levi was suddenly lifting Eren into the air.

Eren was still smiling like crazy, clinging to Levi's neck in a death grip, while Levi haphazardly made their way back to the beach, falling down in the water several times and getting back up to run around with Eren in circles. They ended up falling awkwardly on the sand, their bodies still half in the water, Eren touching Levi's face, smiling and laughing.

No sound escaped his lips, but Levi couldn't care less because Eren looked too damn _happy_, and that made Levi too damn happy as well, and he found himself actually laughing too before kissing Eren messily on the mouth.

There was a loud burst of barking from a distance away, and soon Bean was on the beach with them, bounding around happily while Levi lifted Eren up into the air again, the two grinning and laughing like the joyful lovestruck fools they were.

* * *

**...Oh man, I felt like I was writing ****m-preg when Eren was getting his legs back. XD Sorry that he didn't come up from the water with a sparkly dress like Ariel. The thought of Levi holding Eren and running in circles with him was just a lot more appealing than Levi just twirling Eren around. ^O^**

**Ah, and this will NOT be the last chapter, there is still more to come! Unfortunately, it might take me a long time to update, as I will be starting classes come Monday. X( I'll try my best, though... **

**Reviews make me run around and be happy! Like Bean! XD**


	9. Now We Can Run

**DO YOU HEAR THE SHIPPERS SING? **

**SINGING THE SONGS OF THEIR FIC!**

**IT IS A MUSIC OF A FANDOM WHO WILL-**

**OH ME GOODNESS IT'S BEEN OVER TWO MONTHS...**

**While this has not been my longest hiatus, I'm still very sorry about this delay, especially at the rate I was typing up chapters in August. F****irst time at college... first time in a new environment... new friends... Kevjumba videos... yeah those are my excuses for taking so long. ^_^"**

**Thank you all you awesome reviewers! Yeah... that's... all I can really say right now. =) I**

**Ah, actually, it's not... I love you guys! You make my day! You make me feel all warm and fuzzy inside like how Eren makes Levi feel and vice versa! XD**

**Oh, and I know some of you were kind of disappointed that Eren lost his voice again, but, well, I kind of wanted to give them that imperfect realistic (!?) ending. I blame the influence of all the angst fanfiction in here.**

* * *

It felt like the longest silence Levi had ever experienced.

Erwin's mouth had literally dropped open. Hanji looked ready to faint in shock, her hands clutching at her face. The two had ran towards the beach, having heard Bean's barking.

As he stood holding Eren bridal-style, with Levi's shirt wrapped awkwardly around the brunet's waist and sea water still dripping from both of their bodies, Levi couldn't really blame them for being shell-shocked.

"...haaah?" Hanji managed to squeak out as she stumbled closer, nearly falling on the wet sand.

Noiselessly, Erwin opened his mouth several times before finally deciding that he needed to sit down.

"Waah... aa-aah... haaah...?" The doctor attempted again, making vague hand gestures, fresh tears appearing on her face. "A-aah..."

"..." Eren gave her a tentative smile.

Clearly torn between confusion, disbelief, happiness, and other emotions, Hanji struggled a bit more before suddenly wailing a loud "WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" and crashing into the two males, nearly knocking Levi to the ground by the force of her hug.

"OOOF! Hanji-"

"BLEBLE AAAH AAAH AAAH YEEEE YEE GAARG GAAAAAH GAAAAAAAAH!" A mixture of confusing babble continued to spew from the now fully on sobbing doctor. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"

As disturbing and disgusting as her crying was, Levi didn't feel like kicking her away for once. "You... you sound like a beheaded chicken... say something actually coherent, will you?"

Smiling crookedly, Eren untangled one of his arms from Levi's neck to give Hanji's hand a reassuring squeeze. Hanji only sobbed louder, her tears streaming down her face. "E-E-E-E-E-E-EREN-L-LEVI-IDIOT STUPID STUPID STUPID STUPID STUPID STUPID STUPID STUPID STUPIIIIIIIIIID!"

"...shut up." Levi muttered as he closed his eyes, temporarily leaning into her embrace.

Still sitting on the sand, Erwin could only laugh quietly in disbelief.

The waves continued to crash on the beach.

* * *

Far below the surface, Mikasa sank on the ocean floor, her now cropped hair drifting in the water.

A blond merman soon appeared behind her, placing a comforting arm on her shoulder. "You did the right thing." He whispered quietly. Before he could say anything else, however, Mikasa suddenly grabbed him and squeezed him into a cartilage-crushing hug, "M-M-Mikasa!? I can't br-"

"Armin... he's so far away from us..." Mikasa murmured quietly, slowly weakening her hold on the blond. Armin coughed a bit before attempting to smile gently. "N-not really. Now he knows that he can come see us any time he'd like to. He'll just be a few minutes from the shore."

"...but..." Mikasa's pale fingers dug into Armin's shoulders. "I just wanted to be by his side..." She bowed her head, shaking it slightly so her black locks hid her face. "That's all I ever wanted... and now... I can't be by him... forever..."

Armin sighed before embracing Mikasa back. "I know... I know."

"Ahahahaha! And here I was thinking you only had Leonhardt in your mind, Arlet!"

The blond flinched noticeably but didn't let go of Mikasa. "Wh-what are you saying, Ymir! I am comforting a friend! Please sense the atmosphere here!"

"Ahahaha..." Ymir swirled upward, hooking her arm around another blonde mermaid's neck. "I must say, though, that was some confession Eren got, the lucky bastard. I'd still totally dig you too, Christa, even if we were different species!"

"...I-I'm glad we don't have to worry about that, Ymir..." Christa fiddled nervously with her hair as she smiled in the direction of the surface. "Mikasa, don't be too sad... They seem so happy now!"

Mikasa gave a barely perceptible nod as Armin continued to pat her back.

* * *

Surprisingly enough, no one asked any questions.

The mysterious earthquake had thoroughly mystified the town, but after several outbreaks of unusual storms following soon after, the residents decided to just blame it on global warming and go on with their lives.

Levi wasn't really sure to whom or what he should be grateful for having Eren back. So he settled for simply never leaving the boy's side. And Eren didn't mind a single bit.

He couldn't really quite remember the next few days after Eren had gotten his legs back. All he could remember was Eren, Eren, Eren, and Eren.

They literally spent hours lying down together, Eren usually sitting on Levi's lap, running his fingers through Levi's hair, while Levi would wrap his arms around the boy's waist and lean over to place kisses on Eren's head and face until Eren was bright red in embarrassment.

* * *

Eventually, some questions were asked.

Levi was lying down on the couch, resting his head in Eren's lap. The brunet was happily stroking Levi's hair, the adoring expression in his eyes enough to match a lovestruck high school girl.

"By the way, Eren... who was that Mikasa girl?"

Eren blinked at Levi before pausing his petting to reach for his notebook.

_My sister._

"Hmm..." Looking up at Eren, Levi lifted his hand to touch the former merman's cheek. "You guys don't look that much alike."_  
_

_I know. We're not related by blood._

"Yeah. I could tell." Levi cupped his hand around Eren's face. "I think you're a lot prettier." Eren reddened immediately, and Levi had to chuckle at how easy it still was to rile the boy.

Pouting at Levi's amused expression, Eren began writing again.

_Maybe one day we can visit Mikasa and my friends._

Flip. _I can introduce you!_

"Maybe not. She looked like she wanted to drag me down and drown me..." Levi muttered darkly.

_Don't say that, Levi!_

Flip. _I'm sure you guys can become the best of friends!_

"..." Levi jerked his gaze from Eren's notebook back to the said brunet, ready to give a retort, but the words died on his lips when Eren gave him a big grin, setting his notebook aside to rest his hand on Levi's.

_Levi_, Eren hesitantly mouthed, clutching the pale hand closer to his cheek. _I... love... you._

Eren always resorted to mouthing words, Levi noticed, when he was about to say something he thought was important.

"I know." Levi stated in a fake tone of nonchalance, unable to resist a small smirk when Eren's eyebrows furrowed in indignation.

Before the brunette could retaliate, Levi hastily sat up, shifting off of Eren's lap so he could pull the former merman into his own instead. "I love you, too." Levi murmured against Eren's forehead, causing Eren to blush again.

"...Hey, Eren..." Eren tilted his head questioningly. "I think I like seeing you mouthing 'I love you' to me more than you writing it... do it again."

"!?" The brunette gave him the most horrified expression he could muster. "You don't want to?" Levi asked, landing another kiss on Eren's cheek. "For me?"

"..." Eren's subsequent glare was so stern and reminiscent of Levi's usual frown that the author had to let out another chuckle at the irony.

_I... love you._ Eren managed to mouth again before squeezing his eyes in embarrassment and jerking his face away from Levi.

Levi smiled gently as he easily brought their foreheads together again. "...Say it again."

_I love you!_ His eyes still tightly shut, Eren moved his mouth as quick as he could. He was rewarded by a loving caress of his hair. "...Again." Levi whispered.

Sensing the absence of mirth in Levi's voice, Eren hesitantly met his gaze. _...I love you, Levi. I love you. So much... So m_- The rest of his silent speech was cut off as Levi suddenly swooped down to kiss him.

He kissed Eren gently, tenderly, clutching his brat close as if he was trying to convey his response to Eren with his touches. But it wasn't enough, apparently, because as soon as Levi gave Eren time to breathe, the brunette looked at him with hot, determined eyes and mouthed the words, _Say it to me too, Levi._

"I love you, Eren." The way he said it, without a moment's hesitation, made Eren go red yet again. "I love you a lot." Levi continued as he kissed along Eren's jawline. "I love you so much." His pale hand found Eren's tan one and laced their fingers together. "And I'll always love you, so you better stay with me forever, shitty brat."

Eren let out a shaky, soundless laugh, wrapping his arms around Levi's neck. Levi grabbed him closer, his hands slipping under Eren's shirt as he pressed light kisses on the tan neck. "...I love you..." Levi repeated as Eren's breath suddenly hitched. He pulled back to see Eren's face again. "I love..." His voice died again.

Now panting slightly, Eren gazed back at him in expectance, his cheeks flushed an attractive shade of pink as he twisted the collar of Levi's shirt in an iron grip.

"..." Levi swallowed thickly. Damn it. He needed to stop before Eren would explode from blushing so hard. Or before Levi himself would explode because Eren was so FUCKING CUTE CUTE CUTE WHY WASN'T HE ALREADY LEVI'S WIFE-

Ahem. "...sorry..." Levi mumbled, his hands reluctantly sliding out of Eren's shirt to wrap around his clothed waist comfortingly. "Maybe that was... a bit... fast..."

Still trying to catch his breath, Eren resorted to his notebook again. _No... I... didn't hate it..._ Even his handwriting seemed to be trembling. _  
_

"..."

"...Eren..."

"?"

"I need to know... did you... well... were you together with someone else before?"

Eren blinked at him and Levi found himself turning away this time, his stomach involuntarily flipping at the thought of another person with Eren, _his _Eren-

The brunette covered his mouth, his eyes suddenly crinkling in mirth. _Levi is jealous!_ Eren wrote, his green eyes glinting gleefully.

"...shut it, cocky brat." Levi fumed as he kissed the top of Eren's head, preferring not to see his lover's cackling face for the sake of his now-non-existent pride.

Eren gave another silent chuckle before leaning over to peck Levi's cheek.

_Don't worry, Levi__ is my first!_

"...oh..." Levi found himself blushing slightly in relief at the words. "...that's... that's... that's good, goddamn it." He managed to stutter out before seizing Eren and pulling him down on the couch.

Eren clutched Levi back, immediately burying his face against junction of Levi's collarbone and shoulder. Levi rested his chin on the mop of soft brown hair, letting out a quiet, satisfied sigh. He had every right to be content now, his Eren was here, locked securely in his arms, breathing peacefully against him, and -

"...!"

Without warning, Levi jerked back up. "Wait, Eren!?"

"?"

"You... you've never been with anyone before? In all the time that you've lived?"

Eren nodded slowly, confusion evident in his green eyes.

"...That means... you've... you've never had sex before. In all the time you've lived."

Getting more confused by the minute, Eren nodded again.

Levi felt his jaw slacken in horror.

FUCK.

FUCK IT.

FUCK HIS LIFE.

FUCK EVERYTHING.

EREN WAS A VIRGIN. A FUCKING _TWO-HUNDRED YEAR OLD_ VIRGIN. A TWO-HUNDRED YEAR OLD VIRGIN!

WHAT THE FUCK WAS HE SUPPOSED TO DO?

(He should have seen this coming, really, but this was the first time in days that Levi had actually acted on his... his... desires that were a _little_ less innocent than poofy clouds of pink-)

_Levi? What's wrong?_

Flip. _...Is that... bad?_ Eren questioned, trying and failing to hide the fear in his face.

"..." Levi wanted to flip a table at the moment. Badly. "Tch... Don't look at me like that, you little shit." He flapped a hand awkwardly. "I'm just worried! I... I really fucking love you a lot so sometimes I feel like doing _more_ than kissing and hugging you! I'm scared of hurting you, damn it!"

Much to Levi's chagrin, Eren's eyes filled with mirth again.

_Don't be silly, Levi! I trust you!_

Flip. _I know you'd never hurt me!_

Levi stared heavily at his smiling, innocent lover before wondering whether to scream and smash his head into the nearest wall or just kiss his adorable brat senseless. He decided to settle for the latter.

"...idiot... don't... trust me so much..." Levi murmured between kisses. Eren grinned sheepishly.

_It's... really embarrassing. _ He mouthed slowly to Levi. _And uncomfortable. But..._ Eren took Levi's hand again and held it to his cheek. _I want it. Because I love Levi a lot too!_

"...okay..." Was all Levi could say before kissing him on the forehead again.

_Heehee! I'm so happy!_

"...I can already tell, it's also written all over your fucking face." Levi grumbled, immediately wincing a bit at his choice of words.

_Levi l__oves me so much!_

"..."

"..."

Damn everything. How the hell would Levi be able to deflower someone so fucking pure!?

* * *

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! STOP! LEVI! YOU CAN'T DO THIS TO HIM! OR YOURSELF!" Hanji wailed, stomping her feet in place desperately, half covering her face and half staring.

Looking a little embarrassed and averting his gaze, Erwin patted Hanji's shoulder gingerly. "Hanji, I think Levi can-"

"HE CAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN'T!" Even Bean and Sonny winced a bit from the noise the doctor was emitting.

"..." Levi spoke up. "As you said once before, Hanji, it's a free country. I can do whatever the fuck I want." He shifted slightly, causing Eren to wince in surprise. "And that includes eating breakfast with Eren sitting on my lap and feeding me my oatmeal. Hey, brat, give me more." The brunet obliged obediently.

Levi closed his mouth around the offered spoon, his eyes not leaving the newspaper he held in one hand as the other rested on Eren's waist. Having fed Levi, Eren proceeded to scoop some oatmeal for himself, leaning into Levi's shoulder as he did.

"YOU'RE NOT EATING BREAKFAST!" Hanji protested loudly, grabbing the back of her head in frustration. "YOU'RE KILLING ME ON THE INSIDE WITH YOUR FLUFF AND CUTENESS AND ACTING LIKE A NEWLY MARRIED NEET COUPLE! STOP IT! I'LL DIE!"

"..."

"...WAIT NO! DON'T EVER STOP IT! I'LL DIE! HNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGG-"

Levi narrowed his eyes as he flipped to another page. "Erwin..."

"Yup..." Erwin replied automatically, his hand gently tugging Hanji by the collar of her shirt. "We're leaving now. We just wanted to make sure you two were alive and well. I bought some groceries, so I will just leave these here and _we_ will be going-"

"DON'T FORGET THE ROSE PETALS!" Hanji suddenly burst out, pulling a bag out of nowhere and letting loose a blizzard of petals in the room.

"H-huh?"

"The fuck, Hanji, get out, you're ruining my breakfast!" Levi mumbled through another mouthful of oatmeal as Eren frantically tried to brush the petals off their heads.

"NOOOOOOOOO EREN MY BABY-"

_Slam._

"Leave it to that nut to give us more shit to clean up- what the hell are you smiling about, brat?"

Eren left the spoon in the oatmeal bowl to pick up his notebook and pencil.

_Because Levi is happy!_

Flip. _I know it!_

"...Hmph. So _now_ you're able to read my expressions?" Levi muttered in scornful disbelief, his tone contrasting with the way he stroked Eren's hair free of petals.

Eren nodded enthusiastically.

Levi only rolled his eyes, but secretly, he had to admit, he was feeling the same way. Eren's notebook was becoming more and more unnecessary, Levi could now tell (to a certain extent) what Eren was feeling or what he wanted by simply watching the boy's face and his body language.

And it made Levi happy too.

* * *

Despite Levi's less-than-enthusiastic attitude, Eren did end up taking him to meet Mikasa and his other mer-friends.

The atmosphere was riddled with a tension reminiscent of a protective father meeting his daughter's first boyfriend.

Levi had glared at Mikasa the entire time, expecting her to either attack him or try to snatch Eren away at any moment.

Mikasa responded with ice-cold politeness, clearly not happy with how Levi draped his arm protectively over Eren's shoulders and prevented the brunet from putting more than a toe in the water.

Eren, Armin, and Krista all tried their best to maintain a friendly and light conversation, but it ultimately failed when Ymir began shamelessly questioning about the progress of their relationship, along with Levi's blatant response and Mikasa's angry reaction.

Personally, Levi thought the visit to his parents had been much better. Even though he himself had initially been against it.

* * *

"...There's really no point in being here." Levi mumbled as he reluctantly trudged through the rows of headstones.

_What are you saying, Levi?_

Flip. _There's__ many points in being here!_

"Whatever..." Levi sighed before pausing in front of a pair of graves. "We're here. This... these... are them. What's left of them. Yeah."

Eren immediately brightened before he bent to sit down respectfully. Levi raised a questioning eyebrow at him as the brunet began to write in his notebook, taking extra time to make his handwriting neater.

_Hello, Levi's parents!_

Flip. _My name is Eren Yeager. It's very nice to meet you._

"...Eren-"

Flip. _Your son Levi is... a funny person. __  
_

Flip. _He acts grumpy all the time, his face always stays the same, and he cares too much about cleaning._

"..." Did Eren _have_ to write that?

Flip. _But he's also very kind and thoughtful and loving. I love him very much._

So Eren could write things like that easily and joyfully in front of a grave but not in front of Levi, huh?

Flip. _That's why I'm very grateful to you for having Levi and raising him. I can tell that Levi cares about you very much._

Flip. _I'm clumsy and there's still a lot that I don't know._

Flip. _But I'll do my best to take care of him from now on._

Flip. _Thank you._

* * *

Levi had watched Eren in silence, but as they left the cemetery, he suddenly paused and took off a scarf he was wearing. "Eren. Hold still for a bit so I can put this around you."

_Huh? But Levi, I'm not that cold._

"Just let me do it." Levi muttered before wrapping his scarf awkwardly around Eren's neck and then taking the brunet's hand.

"..."

_Hey, Levi,_ Eren mouthed as his hand was occupied, _do you think they would have liked me?_

Levi snorted. "Are you kidding me? They would have gone completely fucking gaga over you. It might be have been even worse than that damn Hanji."

* * *

There were some pleasant surprises.

One morning, Levi opened his eyes to see an empty spot next to him. Fruitlessly telling himself not to panic, Levi swung himself out of bed and was short of screaming Eren's name when-

...was that _pancakes_ he smelt? A quick dash into the kitchen confirmed that yes, there were pancakes in the kitchen, along with a startled (and adorable) Eren wearing an apron and in the middle of washing dishes. "...the hell are you doing, Eren?"

_Clang!_

Nearly destroying several plates in the middle of trying to get his notebook, Eren finally managed a few, hastily-scribbled lines of soapy hand-writing.

_LevisorryIjusthtoughtitwoudlbegooodtomakepankakes_

Flip! _Don'twrorryi'llcleanall of it up_

Flip! _It's_

Flip! _...I don't know..._

"..." Levi glanced at the table, loaded with what looked like a week's worth of unburnt pancakes, and then at the counter, which held a what looked like a month's worth of... not-so-nicely-cooked pancakes. He wondered how on earth Eren managed to make anything without burning half of the house down, but then remembered Hanji had borrowed (KIDNAPPED) the brunet yesterday to teach Eren how to cook.

Thoroughly flustered, Eren hastily ran in front of the burnt pancake stack, blocking them from Levi's view.

Flip! _Those... don't eat them..._

Flip! _That was practice... don't look..._ Eren explained, shamefully ducking his head behind his notebook as he did.

Levi continued to stare at Eren for a few seconds before shoving him lightly out of the way, ignoring Eren's questioning glance.

_Wait, Levi, what are you doing?_ Eren scribbled, panicking as Levi began helping himself to the burnt pancakes.

_STOOOOOOOP LEVI THOSE ARE NO GOOD!_

"Shut up." Levi growled, grabbing onto one of Eren's flailing wrists. "There's nothing wrong with these. So stop trying to waste food here."

_BUT-_

"I'm eating it." Levi said in a stern warning tone. "Now stop trying to clean and eat your damn food with me first."

Unable to disobey, Eren hastily scrambled to sit next to Levi, still looking awkwardly at the floor. Levi rolled his eyes and pulled Eren's chair closer to his own. "...Eren, you don't have to force yourself to do... whatever you're trying to do. If Hanji's talk of being my... my wife is what's causing you to act like this, then-"

_I'm not forcing myself!_ Eren wrote quickly, almost knocking over a stack of pancakes as he did.

Flip. _I really do want to learn how to make food for Levi!__  
_

Flip. _And how to clean better like Levi!_

Flip. _And how to fold and make Levi's clothes nice too!_

Levi swallowed a mouthful of Eren's pancakes without batting an eye. "So you want to be my wife. That's fine. You can still be my wife without doing all those things."

_WHAT!?_ This time, Eren nearly fell off of his chair.

Putting out a hand to steady Eren, Levi gave a rare smirk. "Oh? You don't want to be my wife then?"

"..."

_Stop teasing me, Levi..._

"Heh..." Levi's hand slowly left Eren's shoulder.

His pout fading, Eren began to write again.

_I really do want to do those things, Levi._

Flip. _Not because I think I __have to._

Flip. _But because I want to make Levi happy!_

"...stupid brat. You just need to be here to do that."

_But when you love someone, you want to make them even happier, right?_

Levi was certainly not feeling all warm and fuzzy inside when he saw that.

Flip. _If it's too much troubling for Levi, I can stop-_

"If I didn't want to eat your cooking, I wouldn't eat it." Levi quickly interrupted, his eyes glued to his plate. "Besides, your cooking. it's... it's not as shitty as I thought it'd be. So..." He reached out to ruffle Eren's hair. "Thanks, Eren. I appreciate it."

The brunet's eyes widened before brightening up in delight. Letting out a silent giggle, Eren leaned over and pecked his lover on the cheek.

"...Although..." Despite himself, Levi eyed Eren's apron-covered body as he bent his head to whisper into Eren's ear. "You know, there are other ways to make me happier..."

"!?" Eren gave him a look of innocent bewilderment.

_What do you mean by that, Levi?_

"...You'll figure out... later. By the way... where'd that apron come from?"

_This? Oh, it came from-_

"Wait, wait, WAIT, don't even answer, I know, it was Han-"

_Chief Erwin! He said Levi would be happy if I wore it!_

"..."

"...HAAAAAH?"

Erwin was going to have some major explaining to do.

* * *

There were some... surprising surprises...

"I'm home..." Levi drawled lazily as he shut the door, starting to take his bag off. "Did you clean the windows proper-" His fingers suddenly froze in shock, the shoulder strap of his bag slipping from them.

Eren, who had bent down to retrieve a spoon he had dropped, straightened and turned to face Levi, beaming brightly as he shook the folds of his maid dress.

_Levi! Welcome home!_

Flip. _How was your day out?_

"..."

"Eren..." Levi began slowly, his eyes slightly bulging as he spoke, "I thought... we would talk about wearing that... that thing later-"

Eren pouted slightly, and Levi had to strongly resist the urge to practically glomp the brunet then and there.

_But there isn't anyone else here to see me!_

Flip. _And you don't hate it, right, Levi?__  
_

"...no... but..." Twitching slightly, Levi tried to keep his gaze focused on the wall beside him, but his eyes kept flitting back to Eren. "That's..."

His head tilted inquisitively, Eren took a step towards Levi, who automatically retreated.

"..." Eren suddenly burst out into a fit of silent giggles.

_Levi looks so funny!_

"Shut up..." The black-haired muttered as he face-palmed half in shame and half in embarrassment.

Flip. _Am I really that cute?__ Haha, now I see, Levi really does get shy when he sees me in this!_

"...Are you making fun of me?"

Flip. _I should wear this more often!_

"Damn it, Eren, NO!"

Still shaking slightly from laughter, Eren grinned mischievously at Levi before suddenly pulling his cheeks and dashing away.

"Eh..." Levi stared after Eren for a second. "Why you...!" He found himself exclaiming almost playfully before easily catching up to the brunet, scooping him up and kissing his cheek.

Eren wriggled against Levi's hold, but still laughed and leaned into Levi, his hands resting on Levi's shoulders.

"Shitty brat..." Levi muttered while smiling reluctantly, about to force Eren down into a kiss when-

"Hey," A freckled, smiling man called from the open door, "Levi? Sorry to intrude on you, but I was wondering, do you know the tall dark blond teenager who has a really bad temper-"

"..."

"..."

"..."

"Oh."

"Hey."

"Uh."

Flip. _Nice to meet you?_

"...uh... um." Marco swallowed nervously as he slowly backed away. "I'll... never mind. It's... not important... I'll... email you... la... ter..."

_Slam!_

"..."

_Levi? Why do you look so... defeated?_

"Fuck my life..."

* * *

_Later that evening..._

Flip. _Levi, who was that guy, by the way?_

"Marco Bodt. My editor." Levi explained casually as he laid on the couch. "He's the guy I went to see today."

Flip. _Oh, I see. What did you see him for?_

"I'm going to start writing again."

The sudden declaration startled Eren, who had began folding their laundry.

_Really, Levi? How come?_

"It's started to reappear. My desire to write." Levi explained, uncrossing his legs.

Eren smiled cheekily as he set the clothes aside. _Is it because of me, Levi?_

"...maybe."

Flip. _What will you write about? I want to know!_

Flip. _Will it be about mermaids!?_

Levi chuckled at the eager expression on Eren's face. "No, probably not."

Eren wilted in disappointment.

_Flip. Then what will it be about?_

"It'll be about a grumpy person."

Flip. A_ grumpy person?_

"Yeah. A grumpy person." Levi reached over to touch Eren's hand. "A grumpy person who learns how to be happy."

* * *

There were also some really bad surprises.

"...so you're... Annie..." Levi said slowly. He and Eren had gone to visit Eren's friends again. Armin had also brought along Annie, the sea witch who had turned Eren human and who Armin had adamantly referred to as his "FRIEND". Perhaps he had mistakenly thought it would lower the tension between Mikasa and Levi.

"Yeah." The half-octopus woman replied nonchalantly, her cold eyes flicking to Eren, who returned her gaze steadily. "...So. How's your human life going?"

"..."

_Fine, thank you, Annie._

"...so... nowwww have you two done it?" Ymir questioned curiously, much to the embarrassment of Eren, Krista, and Armin.

"YMIR!"

"Why do you ALWAYS have to talk about those kinds of things?"

"..." Mikasa said nothing but glared heavily at Levi.

"...actually, now that I think of it, you two should be careful." Annie suddenly remarked, momentarily catching everyone's interest.

"Huh?"

_What do you mean by that?_

"Eren's a human male, but he can still get pregnant."

"..."

"..."

"_WHAAAAAAAAT-_"

"No need to panic, it won't ever happen as long as you guys use those... what are those called, condoms?" Annie paused as she took in both Levi and Eren's shocked faces.

"...wait... you guys... didn't use one?"

"..."

"..."

Levi and Eren slowly turned to face each other, the former's mouth slackened in astonishment while the latter gazed with wide eyes.

"...Ah."

OH SHIIIIEEEEEEEEETTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT -

* * *

_...What? No. No. NO. Fuck that. That certainly NOT how you were born, damn it! _

_You're our ADOPTED child, ADOPTED. __Annie was just fucking with us!_

_...but it doesn't mean we love you any less, so stop looking at me with that expression... I swear, for someone who isn't related to Eren, you two pull the same goddamn faces around me..._

_...what do you mean, "so you guys actually did have sex?" _

_...we did, but why the hell would you want me to go into detail about stuff like that-_

_AUNTY HANJI TOLD YOU **WHAT?** THAT'S IT, YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED NEAR HER ANYMORE!_

_No, Eren, I am not going to fucking calm down, I swear-_

_...hmm? More of the story? ...Well, it's in a pretty good place, let's stop it there._

_The rest? Come on, you already KNOW the rest, we've told you that story at least five thousand four hundred ninety three times already. But yeah. That's the story of how Mom and I met, and why Mom can't speak. NOW do you understand why I waited until you were older to tell you? _

_...Yes, that is why Uncle Jean and Mom get into arguments so much..._

_...Yes, that is why Aunty Mikasa doesn't like me that much..._

_...what happened to Car and Grishy? No, they're not dead, they're still alive, they're those big-ass carp in our pond. _

_NO, you were not named after a goldfish, you were named after your grandparents! From Eren's side and mine!_

_Hmph, you're welcome, you tiny brat. Now, it's actually pretty late, so go to bed._

_Yes, NOW. NO, Eren, it is not all right if we let the brat stay up a little longer-_

_...Night. I love you too._

* * *

**For those of who don't understand... their (adopted) child is asking Levi questions, and he's answering them. He and Eren had been telling their kid the story the whole time. XD might have been a little awkward at the kissing parts... meh oh well.**

**Anyway, I'd like to say that I really enjoyed writing this story! I have to say, it wasn't exactly my best work (I really should to go back and correct a lot of errors here and there) but ****I was really honored and touched and happy with all the feedback I received. =) I even got FANART! (Hana Sakurano)**

**Also thanks to my dear KkarolBoss for putting up with my ridiculous rants, haha! ^_^ Without you, I don't think I would have been able to even pick out a title for this fic...**

**...so... yup! That's it, folks! ^O^" Hope ya all liked it!**


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